Reflections

What a sad start to 2012

2012-01-01T20:31:00.000+05:30

How can 2012 be happy for me when it has started on such a sad note! The last week was one of the best I had ever had since I started working. My parents and my sis had come over to my place and were here since 24th Dec. And today, they have gone back.

How desperately I had wished that time just comes to a standstill. I wished they had stayed longer. But then I also know even if they had stayed for 1 year, it wouldn't be enough for me. All good things come to an end. And so has this.

Those lunch boxes for the lunch and for the fruits, that morning breakfast, that ready dinner when I came back home, that magic presence because of which I didn't have to worry about anything in life and etc etc. I am missing them too much, even when it is not even 1 hour.

2011 - the year that was

2011-12-31T01:10:00.006+05:30

" I again emphasize, 2010 has been the best year for me. I wish 2011 to be still better, and if not, I am going to MAKE IT :)"

These were the closing lines of my blogpost exactly one year back where I summarized my learnings of the year. So, it is again time I ponder over 2011 that sees the last sunrise today, and what has been my take-away from this one.

2010 had indeed been special and I had hoped 2011 would be better. But it couldn't happen. Rather, it went the opposite way. Whereas the last year was so eventful, this year had been confined to the same routine of office to home and home to office. It has been 17 months now at The Smart Cube and am still the same here. En-route, I have been promoted as the Senior Analyst, but that was always on the cards. The best thing that had happened was that I cleared CFA Level 2. The worst thing - I still do not have a job in Finance domain.

Talking of takeaways, I think each day and each minute of your life teaches you something. Whether it is for your good or your bad, learning curve increases always.

Patience is the best virtue - but should be accompanied by smart work. It is good to wait for better results, but shrewdness is the much needed aspect to survive in today's competitive world.

Work hard, but make it known even if you can't make it count. Your top management should know your effort and the hard work. Even if you have not put in so much, exaggerate it in pubic.

This is in context to CFA Level 2. Practically, I just got 20 days to study for this. There was not even a minute chance to clear this days before the exam, yet my hard work paid and I got through. So, put your honest hard work in those areas where your fate lies in your own hands exclusively, means where no one else is there to decide your destiny.

Human being is the most selfish living organism in this world. When they need help, they would be utterly sweet towards you, and the moment their job is done, they won't even recognize you. Hence don't overdo anything for anybody.

Never trust anyone in the office. Be a diplomat (not possible for me though)

Brand name of the college you graduate from is the foremost important point, rather than how well you perform in any college. Even if you are a 5 pointer from IIT/IIM, you are a genius. And even if you are a perfect 10 from XYZ college, you are useless.

Learn to be vocal. You are getting paid for the hard work you put in. Your company is not obliging you by paying. Hence, raise your voice if you face any issues there. And more so, maintain the work life balance.

Futures and Options market is more addictive than alcohol/tobacco. And majority of the time, you end up losing your hard earned money.

I hope 2012 goes better. And who knows where would I be exactly one year later. I can easily predict that 2012 is going to be the 2nd most happening year of my life (after 2010).

Happy new year to all. God bless you!!

Trying to be at ease

2011-12-10T23:36:00.003+05:30

It has never been 3 months that I haven't written down anything here. And it has a reason this time. I am occupied with too many things right now that although I wish to write something here, I won't, because the situations have changed.

Let me explain. When I was in college or at Rewa or my initial phases of The Smart Cube, there was one common thing - Fearlessness. Whatever I wished, I penned down, without fearing about the repercussions. At college, the reason might be that I thought - the management or the faculty is obviously not have the time to read a blog of some XYZ student, and secondly, my thoughts generally reflected that of other fellow students, hence I always had support and more importantly, I was being the voice of others, which I enjoyed.

I wrote many negative things about my stint at Rewa. Though it was true, I didn't fear because there was nothing to fear. Again, no one was going to read that and in any case, I always knew I was leaving that place once and for all in a very short time.

About The Smart Cube, I have always written good things. This has also increased my blog's visibility as I notice that many prospective employees search for the information about this organization through my blog. Simple reason - this is a small company, and not many web links exist about it.

Since the last few months, there have been certain developments in my life which I feel is unsafe to share on this public forum. I have, lately, stopped being so vocal about my personal life. I have realized that privacy is very important and have grown to be matured enough to understand the importance of each word I speak and write. This is atleast what a 16 month stint in a corporate world has taught me.

There are ambitions, there are dreams. I am just not finding the way to realize them. I can see my dreams turning into reality one day, but I am feeling dejected to see that there is no opening I can find. I have taken many wrong decisions in my life and thus, it is becoming more difficult for me to take the next plunge, fearing this might also turn out to be one of those wrong ones.

Whatever I can reveal is - everyone has his own belief and lifestyles, I have one too. Many want to get settled with a secured job and regular earnings, have a family and lead a tension free life. My thinking is that I am already 25, and am just another common man in this world. Why world, even in my local street, I am just nobody. I want to make a difference, but I am not able to find a way.

This post was just to ease myself out of the shackles I have put my mind into. A small illustration of outburst on my very own page might soothe and refresh my mind and encourage it to move ahead. In Hindi, man ki bhadaas nikaal raha hun yaha.

CFA Level 2: the journey and the outcome

2011-09-13T23:46:00.002+05:30

When you feel from within that you are writing a post only to increase the counter, there is certainly something wrong. This post has been long due and somehow, I could never build up the mood and the tempo. Well, here it is ... Finally!!!

26th July, 2010 was a historic day in my life. It was my first day at The Smart Cube and on the same day, CFA Level 1 result came out and I had passed the exam. The euphoria and the pride did last for few moments, but then it was the next obvious thing. Registering for the CFA Level 2 as soon as possible.

Well, Level 2 has historically been the most difficult of all the three levels. Yes, Level 3 is said to be easier. This prompted me to start studying from Day 1 and try to have a huge buffer time for the 2nd, 3rd, 4th... revision and solving question papers. I registered for the exam somewhere around mid-August and the 6 glossy, shiny books arrived back at home in Lucknow.

There was a time when I loved new books (context: school), only because they were new. Who doesn't love new things? But that love soon faded away when there was a realization that those have to be read also. Times have changed. Now, I waited to look at my new precious possessions only to start with them without wasting much time.

It would have been mid-September when I started the cramming part. I made up the time-table as to which chapters needed to be read till what date, then further breaking the chapters into number of pages to be read in a particular day, etc. etc. Swati (Parikh) advised me several times to get rid of the heavy volumes of CFA material and start reading the Schweser's notes, but my philosophy was different. I thought notes would never build the concepts, they can only enrich you with a limited knowledge that you will pass the exam.

However, I kept reading the books. The further I got, the more I started forgetting what I had read. It seemed like a task that I need to spend 10 minutes on a page just to read the lines, not understanding them at all. Finally, I tool 6 months to read through all the books once. It was already March end.

2 months into the exam, and I re-opened Book#1, just to find that I couldn't even recognize some terms which I had already gone through. Had it not been for those pencil marks, I would have been sure that I skipped the books completely.

Though it came as a depressing shock to me, there was something more waiting. From April 6, I was staffed on a project at my company which somehow, made me to work 14+ hours a day. Even on weekends, I went to the office. The scope of the project said that it will end somewhere in the last week of May, i.e., a week just before my exam was.

I took the first opportunity to bring it to my manager's notice that I had already applied for a 2 week leave in May and I requested to make it 3. Request Denied.

My last resort was to quit the eccentricity (read: books) and pick up Schweser's ASAP. I tried to study PDFs in every 5-10 minutes break I could steal in the office and then from 11pm to 2 am when at home. Those were really tough days. I compared it with Level 1, where I was at home for full 45 days. Here, I seemed to start from scratch in April and with just 2-3 hours a day, there seemed to be no end. Talked to Kaushik, who was also to give the paper, he told that he had withdrawn because of the lack of time. I thought to do the same, but something stopped me.

Vaibhav Jain can never fail. This is what I just kept on saying to myself. I negotiated with my manager and somehow, on 10th May, I was allowed to leave. That left me with 23 days to study. No sooner did I reach Lucknow than I picked up the Schweser's hard copies and glued myself. It started with 10 hours a day to finally 16 hours daily. My sleeping hours shifted everyday by 1 more hour, like it was 4 am to 11 am on one day, then on next it was 5 am to 12 noon, and so on. My breakfast had become my dinner, lunch my breakfast and dinner my lunch. Moreover, I never before heard my father say to me that don't study so much and find time for yourself. Haha!!

31st May and I finally completed 3 rounds of going through all the Schweser notes. 3 days left and so many test papers to take. For Level 1, I gave myself 10 days to solve the test papers and I knew that only helped. And for Level 2, just 3 days. Anyways, not giving up the hopes, I continued with solving test papers. All through, I knew I have fallen short by atleast 3 days.

Couldn't comment on the level of my preparation, I went for the exam on June 5th. Well, the morning paper was a torture, a black fate that seemed to be have written when I turned down Swati's suggestion. Would you believe it, I missed 20% of my paper because of lack of time. Since, CFA doesn't do negative marking, I just plainly ticked the remaining questions after quickly just glancing through them. It came as s huge shocker and my morale was so down that I was demotivated to do well in the afternoon session.

The good thing was, everyone around me was depressed with their performance, even Swati whom I met in the exam hall during lunch break. The afternoon session started, and I moved on strategically, not wasting too much of time on a particular question like I did with Derivatives (spent 45 minutes on just one set of question). I started with my strongest area - Quant, but somehow even that simplest of question looked out of my reach.

Disgusted with myself, as I use to impart tutorial sessions at my company on the same concepts. I, however, could complete this paper on time and I could say it went better than the morning.

Thought a lot about the exam for some days and then completely forgotten, taking it as a surety that I have flunked. I started looking for alternative exams that can help me move onto my dream of landing up in an investment bank.

26th July, 2011. Exactly 1 year later than that historic day was my result scheduled to arrive at my mailbox. It gave me tremors. Although I knew I had flunked, yet the surprise element always remained. I applied for a leave on 27th, as I thought I couldn't face questions of my colleagues - pass or fail??

The result had to come by 6:30 pm. I continuously refreshed my inbox about 10 times a minute. Parents and sister had come to my home at Noida for few days, and my sister's first question as soon as I came home was - what about the result? I just said, I have failed.

From 6:30 to 8 pm, I was chatting with Kushal. He, too, was waiting for his result. At around 7:45pm, he said that he passed, result had arrived. Next 15 minutes were more horrifying for me. And at last, at about 8 pm, I received the e-mail. PASSED!!!

Thank you Maa, Papa, Anjali, Arunesh, Swati, Manica and all those who played small roles in motivating and encouraging me. Love you all!!

Level 3 is on June 3rd, 2012 :)

Supporting Anna Hazare's Lokpal Bill

2011-08-30T10:23:00.002+05:30

The newspapers, television, internet, hoardings... everything these days is filled with Anna Hazare, protesting for Indians to eradicate corruption. This revolution is said to be the strongest post the Independence in 1947.

All educated Indians, somewhere or the other, feel so let down, dejected, irritated with corruption in the country. For the last few months, this reached the pinnacle, where everyday some scam was caught with a total money involved amounting to thousands of crores. So, it was high time that some cleaning needed to be done in this country.

I started earning from June 2010. As a responsible citizen, everyone has to duly pay taxes. I was ready for this. Although my tax for the last fiscal was nil, but the feeling that I will have to pay few thousands to the Government this year is really bothering me. Look at the kind of return they bless us with. My hard-earned money is going to the accounts of these fraudsters. Nothing is proper in India. And the politicians are not the only ones to be blamed. We, as citizens of the country, were doing nothing, until now. And now, when the movement was initiated by Anna Hazare, something remarkable happened.

I first heard about Anna ji through Facebook, in March. A friend of mine had shared a video figuring Anna ji and Kumar Vishwaas. They were requesting the citizens to wake up and support Anna ji for protesting against the Government, asking it to pass a Lokpal Bill, which underlines some strict laws for all the corrupt politicians and public alike. He was to sit on a fast to begin somewhere in April. I appreciated the old man's intentions and initiative, but then moments later, forgot about it thinking that nothing is going to happen. I bet, there would be many like me who would have thought this during that time.

One thing separated India from other countries. We have trends of events here. If someone is going to do something which gives him publicity, it becomes a trend and everyone starts doing the same. And then our media... always hungry for such kind of actions. Anna ji's protest became famous and it made the 74-yr old unknown person a famous personality.

Soon after, yoga-guru Ramdev baba started his own version of fasting. It failed miserably due to mismanagement and various other issues. The difference I can gauge is the intention. While Anna ji really wanted to create a spur, for Ramdev it was a publicity stunt.

Anna ji announced a lot in advance that he was again set to start indefinite fasting from August 16, 2011. This time, everyone was eagerly waiting and excited to bring a difference. Marketing was properly done and the build up to the event made it more popular. Anna ji and team was sent to Tihar Jail because the politicians feared what would happen if the bill was actually passed. It was ironical that Government took years and months to arrest corrupt officials like A. Raja and Kalmadi, but only few minutes to imprison someone who was protesting against the corrupt. It happens only in India.

Anna ji was idolized as second Mahatma Gandhi. His principles were same and he was a Gandhian. Indeed he began his indefinite fast on Aug 16 in the Ramlila Ground, New Delhi. Thousand of supports came in from all over Delhi and infact, India to voice their support. The Government, after various ups and downs, took 12 days to finally concede to Anna ji's request. But these 12 (+1 for celebrations) days saw what India had never seen after Independence in 1947.

I thought that only the World Cup Cricket win or Sachin's 100th 100 can unite the Indians in this way. But the crowd which came to support Anna for this social and noble cause changed my mindset. I started believing that Indians have become frustrated. Although no one really took to initiation, when it began, all came together. I went to Ramlila Ground on Saturday, 27th Aug. I had never seen such a huge crowd and all educated, disciplined lot. It really looked like fellow countrymen and supporting and fighting for each other. Tricolor was waving everywhere. Slogans for Anna ji and India were heard everywhere. Vande Matram had filled in the atmosphere like eternity. It was a very very great experience I felt on Saturday.

The Government agreed to Anna ji's 3 demands and he broke his fast the next day. There were more than 1 lakh people gathered for celebrations. In the evening, similar number of people gathered at India Gate for celebrating the success. Malls, etc were found desolated as every other person was busy supporting the cause.

If things go as planned and wished, we might see a better India in next coming years. Probably, it can change my stance to settle abroad for my lifetime as nothing seemed happen for the betterment of this country.

Shiva Oasis Resort - Review

2011-07-14T13:00:00.004+05:30

Last weekend was fun. Or what would you expect when half a dozen school friends gather and decide to take a plunge for partying? I have already penned down my experiences for that memorable trip and I use this post to give a review of the resort where we spent a day in and which somewhat spoiled our overall fun - Shiva Oasis Resort.

Shiva Oasis Resort is located on the Delhi-Jaipur Highway, about 5 kms from Neemrana Fort in Rajasthan. We chose this place as it boasted of many features, excellent infrastructure and it fit into our budget well (Rs 6500/day for a room) . Moreover, it was so close to Neemrana Fort that we zeroed in on this.

When we booked the tickets, we were asked to hurry up for the confirmation as there was only limited availability because of heavy weekend rush. So we confirmed and handed over the advance payment ASAP. On Saturday, when we reached there, we could hardly find 4-5 odd cars parked. It was so desolate as if we guys were the only guests there.

We went straight to the reception and were informed of various time-boundations for different facilities, for example, no swimming after 8 pm, no lunch after 3 pm, etc. Flabbergasted with the difference in their advertisement on the website and the reality we found, we were quite upset. We had no other option, but to extract the fun within our group itself without any external support. Just thought that we could have done this even at our home. To add to the agony, we found no other guests there, except for one family.

Nevertheless, after checking in at about 3 pm, we saw that the rooms were not ready at all. The television was not working, the Air Conditioner had problems, the room was unclean, etc. We were annoyed with the kind of serivce they provided. Everything was being done on our request, even the cleaning of the room.

We next went for the lunch, and ordered some snacks and food. The lunch was included in our package deal, for which we later on got to know that there were numerous clauses in this as well. Snacks weren't covered in this and shockingly, we weren't even informed of this in advance. We had to pay extra for our entire lunch.

They did not have adequate drinks in their storage. And whatever they had, they charged around 2-3 times the market price. The service at the restaurant was again 'poor'. Next we played some table tennis and asked the autorities for billiards equipment. We were told that table tennis is free but we would be charged for the billiards.

We went to the room and felt quite thirsty. Hence, we ordered 2 bottles of plain water via intercom. The water never arrived until we blasted the authorities on the fourth attempt to request for a bottle of water. And even after that, they brought us mineral water and charged for it later on. Horrible the service and their understanding was!!

Few hours later, we were informed that they had cricket kit which was free of cost. We asked for it and were told to wait for another 40 minutes. They probably felt as if we had the entire week to spend there. Later, we played cricket for about an hour, by which we managed to somehow kill our time.

We were upset by the management so we asked them for an extension in time for the swimming pool from 8 to 10 pm to compensate. They had to agree, they had no other option. We went for the swimming. The pool was a comedy in itself. The maximum depth was just 5 feet and it was hardly 5 meteres long and 3 meters wide. We asked for a ball to play with and they had none. Finally they managed to give us a basketball. But.. A Basketball in the pool, really??

We came out of the pool by 9 pm and went for the dinner after taking a bath. They had South Indian as one of the menu items. Shubham and I were excited to have that and hence we confirmed if we can get that. They were affirmative. But 20 min later, the waiter returned saying that it wasn't possible during that time to serve us south indian. Bull Shit!!

We didn't have too much of energy left, so we went back to our rooms and slept. We decided to leave ASAP from the resort the next morning for Neemrana Fort and then directly back to our home in Delhi.

The next morning, we woke up at about 8 am, went for the breakfast, which was good for a change. Right after, we checked out and left.

Our experience for the overall stay at the resort was aweful.

Service - Very Poor
Infrastructure - Good
Food - Good
Drinks - Average
Swimming Pool - Poor
Other Facilities - Poor

I would recommend to think twice before going to Shiva Oasis Resort unless you are a couple and going there to relax on the weekend. The place is not for fun.

The weekend that was...

2011-07-05T12:50:00.004+05:30

Life has become interesting after that epic exam I took exactly 1 month from today. The weekends, which were totally devoted to studying and completing maximum counted pages I could, these days the weekends are long awaited only for the fun I have planned way in advance. I haven't been completely free on weekends since that day. To add to that, next 4-5 weekends are also planned.

This most recent weekend could be rated one of the best I had in all these years. 7 of us (school friends) made plans to meet up and have loads and loads of fun. Anshul, Mayank, Kush, Shubham, Atish and Abhishek Sinha. I took an off from work on Friday as it was planned to be a three-day out.

But at the last moment, the plan seemed to fail as Shubham, Atish and Sinha told me that they aren't getting tickets to come to Delhi from Lucknow. Somehow, after some bluffing by Anshul, they booked tickets by Volvo and were here on Saturday.

Thursday: I reached at Anshul's place at about 11 pm. Kush was already there and they had made all the arrangements - Smirnoff and Blender's Pride. Nothing much done that day, we were just at home, chit chatting.

Friday: Mayank had to come at about 11 in the morning. Anshul had to go to office for 2-3 hours. Kush had already left for IIT because of some of his lab work. I was alone at home, waiting for these guys to come. It was about 3 and I called Anshul and Mayank to know their whereabouts. Mayank said he would come at about 7 and Anshul told that he was also stuck at office and would come by the evening. I was feeling extremely bad as I seemed to have wasted one holiday of mine. I spent the day surfing the net.

Finally, when Mayank and Anshul were at home, we called up Kush too. Later in the evening, I got to know that the team for the project I was working on had to stay in the office till 12 midnight. So, it was a good decision in the end to have taken an off.

The four of us went to Blue-O @ Ambience Mall, Gurgaon later in the night. We did some bowling and consumed alcohol. Later, I did something which I never expected myself to do and that was, dancing on a dance floor.

We went to eat the paranthas behind the Genpact building at about 12 in the night. Awesome crowd comes there during those hours. Girls and guys enjoy their physical intimacy sitting in their cars, etc ;) Unfortunately, I have only been the spectator always :P

We came back to Anshul's place at about 2 and went off to sleep.

Saturday: Atish, Shubham and Sinha arrived early morning, even before I got up. Some samosas and chhole bhaturey for the breakfast, plus the drinks again. We headed for Shiva Oasis Resort at about 11 am. The car trip was fun. Bought Signature from a highway theka. Finally reached at about 4 and felt very bad on reaching there. We went on to play cricket there (after so many months I had held a bat or a ball), then went on for swimming and later in the night, some drinks again. Slept after a very very tiring day at 12.

Sunday: Frustrated by 'nothing-interesting' at the Resort, we checked out at about 10 am. We did a very heavy breakfast, with me eating 2 Masala Dosas, some Aloo Poori and (for the very first time a non-alcoholic drink in so many days) coffee. We went to Neemrana Fort. One of my office colleague had created a lot of hype over that place about being so awesome. Actually, Neemrana was the only reason why we booked that Resort (vicinity). The entry fee for Neemrana visitor was Rs. 500 per person for just 2 hours. And when we went inside, there was NOTHING worth watching except a few scenic beauty. We were told that the place is good when you stay there as guests-residents for a day or two. Anyways, gloomy here too.

Initially we were puzzled how to cover the entire Fort in just two hours, but eventually came back in about 70 minutes. We drove back home, after a brief 10 min stay at Star Mall, Gurgaon (in search of tickets for Delhi Belly).

Reached back at 3 pm, we watched Pyar Ka Punchnama (once again!!), over Signature and Pizza. Planned to see Shaitan next, Shubham told that the downloaded movie has been cut at a number of places, so it is better not to watch it at home, rather going to some theatre. We decided to go to Select City Walk Mall, Saket.

Having reached there, our plan for the movie got replaced by the visit to Hard Rock Cafe. I had heard about this place umpteen times but never went there. For the first time in my life, I had Tequila Shots, along with some Beer too. By the end of it, even I wasn't down, I thought to give alcohol a break. We came out of HRC and went to PVR, Saket. God, this South Delhi is just so damn cool. Seems girls have descended directly from the heaven. But I feel very sad there, because I keep thinking when will I get opportunity like that, rather then roaming with 5 male friends :P

Came back to Anshul's place at about 12 and went off to sleep by 2 am after a serious leg pulling of Kush.

Monday: Atish, Shubham and Sinha left at 5 in the morning as they had Shatabdi to catch at 6:15. I woke up at 6:30 and went to my home at Noida by 7. And then... the dull day commenced which ended the most awesome weekend I had in several years.

The week after CFA

2011-06-12T21:14:00.002+05:30

It has been 7 days since that horrible day - 5th June 2011 - my CFA Level 2 exam. Paper was too difficult and it seems I have screwed it. All efforts I have been making since so many days seem to go in vain. But anyways, I have decided to move on and forget about that. Since, I can do nothing about it now, I shall just wait for the 'obvious' result.

This week has been very happening. I have not been working to my best of capability in the office, because it is taking me time to get into the groove. Seems like it is time and I escalate myself to start doing some serious work from tomorrow.

Saturday had been the most happening of the days. Wouldn't like to mention it publicly but it was really awesome. I shall keep this private to me.

Have been watching a movie daily since the last four days - Tanu weds Manu, Love ka the end, Pyar ka punchnama and today went to X-Men with Arunesh, Madhur and Ghosh. The movie was not good. In any case, I wasn't willing to go for this, instead I preferred Shaitan. But Madhur didn't like that idea and he was oscillating between X-Men and Ready and we zeroed-in for the former.

Today (Sunday) evening, I met Yash after a total of 11 years. Wow!! Although we had been planning to meet for the last 8-9 months, yet we could never make it. He is leaving for Pune forever tomorrow, so this was the last chance and we capitalized on it. It was so nice meeting with him after more than a decade. I still remember his last words before leaving for Vadodara in 2000 - "I want to see you become the captain of the school". Although I couldn't, but it touched me a lot. Anyways...

I have decided I am going for jogging from tomorrow morning, probably at 5:30 am. This dilemma surrounding the change of my accommodation is increasing exponentially. I am not able to make it whether I continue staying here or shift in with Mayur with two other friends of his. The rent for this current place is too much.

If I clear (1% probability) CFA Level 2, I would repeat that post where I detailed out CFA Level 1 journey, this time about Level 2. If not, well... I don't know what would I be doing then :P

50 hours before the CFA exam

2011-06-03T06:05:00.003+05:30

2 more days to go. Too much on stake. Too much of pressure. And above all, physically I am weak and mentally I have become drained.

This is the situation to the final countdown for CFA exam on 5th June. I am not well. My body has given up. My mind is so tired that even reading a single vignette seems to be the most frustrating thing ever in my life. I have given up everything, including the hope. But there is one thing that has still kept me bounded and committed for the D-day. The ATTITUDE.

As I said, too much is riding on this exam, yet nothing in relation to a job shift or a better pay scale. It is just that I am a pretty egoist and eccentric kind of a person. I registered for this level 2 exam only in over-confidence and a wave of excitement that if I have cleared level 1, I can clear any exam. How ridiculous!!

I know I have it in me to give my best and to give it all. I know I have luck with me (touchwood!!). Yet, the situation now is that I don't see clearing this one this time.

The reason being, I am only 50 hours away from the moment and majority of my answers are going wayward when taking mock. I am finding no clue as of how to find an answer and even how can I come closely to finding it. Over confidence has given way to lack of confidence.

I have taken 15 days leave for the preparation, about Rs 35000 has been invested in it. I have sacrificed fun moments over the last few months, no movies, no recreational activities. Studying in office, fighting with my room-mate to slow down the volume, giving up several occasions I could have got to come home or to go to Gwalior, sacrificed the probable trips to Pathankot and Sammed Shikhar ji, sacrificed the company expedition to Mukteshwar, sacrificed 15 days of leaves, gained about 10 kgs, sacrificed IPL (although I am not interested), sacrificed the opportunity to successfully complete the crunch project I was into and probably degraded my reputation at office of being so mature and responsible that I used to carry.

To add to this, my egoist nature does not allow me to handle and accept failure.

I just hope some miracle happens. I know I have given 15-16 hours a day for this in the last couple of weeks. O God, are you free?

CFA - Sachin says Impossible is Nothing

2011-05-16T01:48:00.003+05:30

I don't think the month of May will see another post after this. The reason being I am toiling for about 12 hours a day to prepare for my CFA, and the interesting thing is that I am finding no hopes of being fully prepared till 5th June.

The biggest mistake I feel I did this year was to stick to the curriculum books despite everyone experienced telling me to go for Schweser right from the start. Swati told me in September that her brother didn't even open the curriculum pack, studied from Schweser and easily cleared the Level 2. I was always of the belief that passing the exam and understanding the concepts are two different things and I opted for the latter. Now I am feel being stupid. At the end of the day, the degree matters. In any case, I am not in the relevant profile, so understanding the concepts do not matter to me much as of now.

I remember the last year when I was preparing for my Level 1. About 50 days I had studied, read the curriculum books about 4-5 times before solving numerous question papers - about 7 days before the final day. This year, even completing the course once will leave me only 3 days for the test papers (as per my assumption on May 12th).

It is not that I realized late to study. I had begun studying in the 2nd or 3rd week of September. I was moving slowly, reading each word of the curriculum book. And where am I now... I don't even remember a single concept what I had read. And this is not unusual. According to majority of the candidates, the first reading is a waste.

It is 16th now. I am yet to start Ethics (this I didn't even do from the curriculum books) and I am in mid of Alternative Asset. That means, Fixed Income, Portfolio Management and Derivatives are still left. And then, re-reading all of the books one more time. I have to do all this in the next 10 days, but how?

I always give motivational advice to every person who needs it. Now it is me who need them myself. I always look to Sachin for the motivation in these situations. I know one thing for sure, as Sachin says - Putting in efforts is in my hands, the results are not. So atleast I should do my part well, the results shall follow.

Last year, I had given up all the hopes at one point of time. And it was only 9th April. This time, 100 times more difficult situation I am in, I just say - I am NOT giving up.

Super crunched times

2011-04-30T01:11:00.003+05:30

I had posted the last one on 11st April. This was the day when it all started. And it seems to finally have taken a pause, and would probably come at a very vigorous speed on Monday, 1st May.

I have been going to the office DAILY, which includes weekends and a Good Friday holiday since 11th April, except for one Sunday (17th April). On weekdays, I am working for close to 13 hours daily, and on weekends for about 8 hours. The condition has become miserable - physically, mentally and financially.

It seems like problems have started to enter my life. I have become weak, unhealthy and leaner. I am unable to find time to study for my CFA, and it is only 4 weeks that are remaining. I have to literally start the course from scratch. Even Level 1, I got 10 weeks to study and had stretched for 12-14 hours a day to complete the course. CFA seems impossible now.

On top of that, salary and promotion problems have demotivated me to a great extent. I am furious. I am not happy at all. I know I deserve it, but I am not getting it. Why? Ufff...

I wish I could pour it out here, but being a public place, I refrain. But inka ye attitude nahi chalega

Sachin @ Kotla

2011-04-11T00:07:00.003+05:30

What's with this April? This is turning out to be my favorite month.

2nd April - India won the World Cup

10th April - I saw Sachin 1st time on the field (2nd overall)

14th April - Saw Sachin for the 1st time ever in my life (came to my college)

24th April - Sachin's Birthday

Anyways, the focus of this article is the event on 10th April. I had gone to Ferozeshah Kotla to watch the IPL4 match between Mumbai Indians and Delhi Daredevils... or to say, I had gone to see Sir Sachin Tendulkar.. for the 1st and probably the last time on-field.

The idea took birth when a bunch of my friends went to Kotla to see India versus Netherlands World Cup match. One of my friend, Neetish told me about 10th April's match and the last chance to see Sachin. Although a bit tentative, I proposed this idea to Arunesh on March 24th, when India was on verge of defeating Aussies. Although still tentative, we booked the tickets on March 30th, when India was on verge of defeating Pakis :)

Not too much excited, I somehow made up my mind to see Sachin. We were 5, reached stadium 1.5 hours before the commencement of the match. This was no theater where each seat was booked. We had tickets, but the choice of seats was purely on first come first serve basis.

There can never be such an excitement for me seeing Sachin versus Sehwag - or Sachin celebrating Sehwag's wicket - or Sehwag giving tips to the bowler how to bowl to Sachin. Brotherhood???

The first disappointment and the surprise was the size of the ground. It was very small compared to what we see on television. All thanks to the lovely camera work. I was reminscient of my own Inter-school match when I was in Class XI. This was no different. Believe my guys, watching a match on TV and watching live, although both amazing, have entirely different feel.

You watch it on TV to have a close analysis, ball by ball, with all comfort and the commentary. The zoom-ins, hawk-eyes, various graphs and charts make it a different ball game altogether. But here in the stadium, it was the experience of watching the icons live. The deafening sound of Sachin... Sachinnnnnn... and the crowd cheering each and every ball and run, the hopes of getting a ball in the crowds in our own zone add excitement and the greenery ofcourse :)

I wouldn't comment on my hatred for IPL which just doubled today. Come on yaar.. Indians cheering Morkel to get Sachin out... not just acceptable. But overall, it was amazing. Though missed the fireworks from Sachin's, Sehwag's or Pollard's bat because of the low total scored by Delhi and then subsequently chased by Mumbai, Malinga's 5 wicket hall made up for it.

I knew this would be my first and the last visit to a live match. In all probabilities, Sachin wouldn't play in Delhi any more unless he plays an ODI next year, but then chances are very low I would be here in Delhi or would be free in that case. So.. it was an experience which would be with me FOREVER.

Sachinesque

2011-03-30T23:53:00.003+05:30

31st March. End of the month. End of Financial Year 2010-11.

End of Shoaib Akhtar's career. End of Pakistan's hope of reaching the Finals of the World Cup. End of Sachin's successful encounters against Pakistan in WC. And... end of the speculations on the teams reaching the finals.

Wow... what a wonderful 8 hours we had just few hours ago. Although on 30th if not 31st, India emerged victorious yet again against Pakis in World Cups. And yet again, the script-writer was our very own Sir Sachin Tendulkar.

This was entirely a different innings than the one in Centurion in 2003, where his 98 of 75 balls is even discussed today. This was a rather un-Sachin-like innings. Out of 450+ ODI innings, never had Sachin got 7 lives before finally succumbing. He got out on 85 of 115 balls. In the interim, he hit marvellous trademark shots, but gave all the fans 7 heart attacks. He was expected to reach his 100th 100, but even he wouldn't have wanted his 100th 100 to be full of 7 lives. It is something you don't achieve daily. He would want to remember this as a fluent innings, full of dominance, full of control and which will mean a lot more... the ton on World Cup FINALS and that too on his home ground.

There was a contribution from almost all the players today. They have looked like a unit since Quarter Finals who are the deserving candidates to lift the cup. They are picking up their games at the right time, at the right moment. Somehow, they aren't disappointing as they did in 2003, where Sachin and the bowlers fought lone battles almost every time. This makes me feel that India can lift the cup this time.

Sachin got out on 4 in the Finals in 2003. He wouldn't want to repeat that, cognizant of the facts about his team's unpredictable collapses. Indian team can collapse anytime, any day. They can beat a team comprising of the best 11 players of the World on one day, and can drag themselves to a loss even against Ireland on the other day. So unpredictable is their nature, that Sachin would not risk it in the Finals this time. This time... being his LAST time.

2nd April would be a big big big day. For Sachin, For team India, For ME. My heart has skipped several several beats on numerous occasions since 1995 (when I started following cricket, err, Sachin). The Cup is the ONLY thing which has eluded Sachin for all those years, accounting to over 2 decades. Sachin's will not be a Bradmanesque end. It will be a Sachinesque end - having achieved EVERYTHING. And more than Everything, it is the RESPECT, that he has achieved.

Love Respect Adulation Trust and Godliness are some of the minor attributes Sachin has earned. People say he is like Don Bradman. I say, please don't insult God by comparing him with a human.

LOVE YOU SACHIN.

Something about myself

2011-03-21T20:33:00.005+05:30

Yesterday was Holi. The festival of colors. And the festival I hate the most (dislike would have been little better but a little less harsh to let people gauge the animosity I have with this festival)

Well, not to dive deep into the reasons for the above, I just thought I pen down things I love and hate (like and dislike) the most, and shall keep updating it :)

First I begin with the negativities (in chronological order - the one I Hate more is ranked above)

1. Dancing

2. Ignorance

3. Holi

4. Someone trying to push me for Non-vegetarian food

5. Partying

6. Faking (believe me, I can't fake for more than 10 minutes and that too after trying a lot)

7. Being away from my parents

8. Coding (in relation to computer programming)

9. Keeping surroundings dirty and unorganized

10. Show-off

Now the things I like and love (again in chronological order - the more I Love are on top)

1. Parents and sister

2. Sachin

3. Gtalk/Facebook

4. Being pampered

5. Maths, Statistics and Finance

6. Chocolates

7. Studying and gaining knowledge about everything

8. Music by A.R. Rahman

9. Respecting elders

10. Cooking

Well, these were the top 10 of both the qualities as of now. There is also one category - neutral to those which many like/dislike very much (means mil jaye to thik, nahi mile to thik)

This is in no particular order

1. Gadgets

2. Movies

3. Bike

4. Pubs/discs/bar (infact, I hate these places)

5. Branded and expensive clothes

6. Delicious food

7. Trying to look hot/cool

8. Gifts

9. People to give me company

10. Adventure

My 24th Birthday

2011-03-16T00:56:00.002+05:30

And this day comes again.. And I have maintained the consistency of the title.. hehe

Well, this was my first birthday after entering the corporate life. Birthdays at schools and colleges have an entirely different meaning than the birthday at the office. Friends are there, ofcourse, but there is a very thick line between a friend and a colleague.

My last year's birthday was an absolute fun.

This year's birthday started with an absolute ill omen. My Reliance phone broke down and so did many calls which I might have received at 12 midnight. Nevertheless, got lots of wishes, expected all but one.

I reached office on time today. Sharp 9 am, only to see that even the customary balloons were missing from my desk. However, after I had spent good 10 minutes on my workstation, the office boys came and put up the decoration. But alas, till then, no one wished me. It was only after seeing the decoration that people realized it was my birth day today. Everyone was so engrossed with their stuff.

Even I had too much of work today. Birthdays in corporate life has no meaning. Literally. Even a 5-10 min chit-chat with colleagues at one of the best companies in terms of fun was too much. Everyone went back to their work and just forgot. But then, what is someone expected to do also? Hehe..

But the best part, and though expected, they ordered a cake for me. It was so tasty, that everyone praised Dipti who ordered it (though I had set my preference even before and had asked to procure this one only). :)

Stepped out of office not before 7:30 and went to Mandir.. I think after a long long time. Came back to home at about 9.

By mistake, I forgot to remove my birthday notification from Facebook. I always want to see that who remembers my birthday actually, not using reminders like these. Anyways, a large number of friends wished me. Felt awesome in the end. Hehe

Finally, I am 24 now. Time to get mature, time to get serious in life. Hope I get a girl this year now, so that I celebrate the quarter century of my life with her. Lol...

The awesome weekend

2011-02-28T21:42:00.002+05:30

Now that I have been termed as a farzi blogger by one of my very good friends, just because of my extremely reduced frequency of posting blog posts, I am reminiscent of the day when Abhiram said that my blog gets update more frequently than Rediff's news. Those were the days... phewww!!! :)

These days I find hard to think of a topic to write. Now that I have decided only to script personal experiences of mine, and no news/reviews/socialism/copy-paste etc, I have lost the vigor to write. Professionalism doesn't allow me to write about office so publicly and now that my life is only office to home to office, there is not much topic.

Indeed. But then, somehow I have the stuff to write today. Not that I am going to crib about India's tie against England yesterday in the WC, nor anything about the Financial Budget of 2011.

Actually, it is about the most awesome time I sometimes get to spend. About every alternate weekend I visit Arunesh's place and enjoy there. Home cooked food, mother like aunty, seems a family away from family. But then, this weekend I went to meet Victor. He has come to Delhi for few days, so I went to Anshul's place. Kush was also there.

I reached Saturday afternoon and the plan was to leave by Sunday evening. As a matter of fact, the school friends are always awesome and so are these bunch of guys. We watched the movie Mirch in the evening on the lappy. The choice of the movie with 4 guy friends sitting around is just obvious. In the night, it was all about Vodka :)

We slept at about 3:30 am and then I got up at 10 in the morning. Watched the match, with Sachin scoring yet another fantastic ton. As I was about to leave at 6, they asked me to stay over and leave tomorrow morning. It becomes so tough to get up at 6 am, board the metro from Dwarka to Noida (1.5 hours), reach home, get ready and go to office. I reached office today at 10:30 am. However, match tied. Huh!!! I am so so so angry.

Victor is going to stay for few more days. If he is here till Saturday, may be we shall meet up Voila. It has been months I have seen her.

Meanwhile, the tension because of my roomie continues. I am happier at office than at home, unlike about all the humans. Performance at office going awesome but back at home, it is so frustrating. People say don't bring office life into home. It is vice versa with me. I take my home tension (and not because of wife) to office.

I stop here. Probably, will write more soon. Sumit, you have given me a reality check now :)

Donated blood for the first time

2011-02-02T20:30:00.005+05:30

Donation in any form is divine, and when the question is of blood, the feeling becomes more divine. I donated blood today, courtesy, The Smart Cube, my organization.

A blood donation drive was held today. This had been intimated about a week ago, and I was firm that this time I won't lose the opportunity. It had happened in the college many times, but never felt doing the good work.

The process lasted about 5 minutes and gave joy for ages to celebrate. I can just say that I would like to donate blood every six months now, if not, atleast once an year for sure. What a great feeling it is to have that you have saved atleast three lives.

I urge each one of my readers to try it once.

And if any of you thinks that I have done a good work, I am just trying to be a replica of my father :)

India are WC 2011 winners

2011-01-26T18:47:00.005+05:30

2010 is over and this is the 1st post of this new decade. And what better way to start it than Sir Sachin.

Okay, so this idea was in my mind since the last 3.5 years and was feeling to share it with all of you soon, but was waiting for the apt moment. And that has come now. With World Cup round the corner, I have some different methodology to predict and confirm that WC 2011 will be won by India.

I am a Data Analyst, Statistics my cup of tea, so here it goes. I am doing a trend analysis to predict this.

Sachin Tendulkar made his debut in 1989, his 1st World Cup was in 1992. Since then, he has played 4 more World Cups - 1996, 1999, 2003, 2007. This will be his 6th (and the last of course) [why I am saying last is because he would continue playing in 2015 only if India doesn't win this WC, but as I am predicting it will, so Sachin will not be willing to stretch it to 2015]

In 1992, India was one of the bottom-most teams, 7th out of 8 teams. Sachin had an okay series. He batted at number 4.

In 1996, India reached till semi final (assume it was 3rd out of 12 teams). Sachin had an awesome series, scoring highest 523 runs. He opened the innings.

In 1999, India was knocked out of the Super Sixes (5th out of 12 teams). Sachin again had just an okay series. He batted at number 4 this time.

In 2003, India reached the finals (2nd out of 14 teams). Sachin had an incredible dream series, scoring record 673 runs. He again opened this time.

In 2007, India fared poorly, knocked out of the 1st round only (would have been in the bottom 4 teams). Sachin had a poor series, he batted at number 4.

Now following the trend, Sachin does amazingly well when opening, in alternate World Cups. With all probability of Sachin opening this time and even the trend says so, he is most likely to be the top scorer in the WC this time too.

Also, India was 3rd in 1996, 2nd in 2003 and now will be 1st in 2011 (progression in alternate World Cups).

This analysis is supported well by the fact that India is one of the favorites to win this time, the other team being South Africa. Again following the trend, South Africa has always been the favorites, yet something unfortunate happens to them each WC.

WC 1992 - D/L method left them to score 20 odd runs in 1 ball when they were on the road to win.

WC 1996 - won all the league matches in their group, yet were knocked out of West Indies, a weak team by then.

WC 1999 - were sailing smoothly when Klusner-Donald mishap resulted in a tie against Australia.

WC 2003 - Rain and D/L again resulted in their ouster.

WC 2007 - Won most matches handsomely, but choked at the last moments. Lost against Bangladesh.

So something unfortunate will yet again happen to them this year as well, may be a defeat by a minnow again [:P]

Together with the above analysis, India is going strong. The team is strong, we have the bench strength, we have Zaheer, we have Sehwag and Gambhir and Yuvi, and this WC is in India, where Raina and Kohli are tigers. And we have Dhoni's LUCK.

Hence, India are WC 2011 winners :)

6 things I learnt in 2010

2010-12-31T22:22:00.006+05:30

When everyone is busy in partying and celebrating, when every TV channel is capturing moments of the gone year, when everyone is wishing each other for a successful and happy new year, I just thought why not I pen down some lessons I took from the most happening year of my life.

Well, 2010 has really been one of the most eventful year in my life till date. I completed my college, I got placed, I resigned, got 're-placed', I did some daring adventures (first time in life), I got settled (to some extent), I got a second family and above all, I got a lot wiser :)

Well, the learnings:

1. Understand your true worth. Dont rush into making rash decisions because of certain uncertainties and later rue them. You will get what you deserve sooner or later.

2. Nothing substitutes hard work. But more than that, luck matters. Everything can't be left on hard work only. Even praying can not change your luck. You get what is 'written'. And as said above, sooner or later.

3. Dots really connect. I have done bachelors in Computers, masters in Finance, but what I do in my job is neither of it. It is something which is my passion, which is my hobby. Petty numerical exercises, Sudokus, brain teasers, etc which I used to solve in Delhi Times and other places, and used to think it is a time waste, has helped me to get a decent and brilliant job. It implies, do something constructive what you like. It is, sometime or the other, definitely going to help you.

4. Networking. Be good to people, no matter how bad they are to you. You may have grudges against them, but in corporate, you always need to be calm, composed and good. Seed and build this into your nature and blood.

5. Take up challenges. There may be many things which horrify/terrify you. But learn to overcome them, by really taking them to task. This is in reference to the trips I'd been to this year, Sattal and Rishikesh. I was a hydrophobic, but was made to swim in an 80 feet lake. Then, rafting in Ganges. Was a terrifying adventure, but I took it and now I find myself more confident to taking up challenges, in any walks of life. Just remember, there is light at the other end of the tunnel AND the biggest challenge is to enter that tunnel. But once you enter, you will always find a way out to the other side.

6. Life is not same everywhere and everytime. There are ups and downs and there are all sorts of circumstances you can be into. I was in Rewa for a month and I learnt the true meaning of a comfortable life back at home, or at cities like Delhi and Noida. But in that one month, I experienced that people are living in those places also. One needs to 'see off' all kinds of phases in life.

You might have read these lessons or quotes many times at many places, but these are coming from MY life experience. I feel one should always learn something from his life, try not to make the same mistakes and always move on.

I again emphasize, 2010 has been the best year for me. I wish 2011 to be still better, and if not, I am going to MAKE IT :)

Municipality and the vendors

2010-12-24T22:45:00.003+05:30

An incident disturbed me a lot some days ago. I was coming back to home from office. There is some 200-250 meter path I need to travel on foot, after getting down from the auto-rickshaw. On this path, there sit some vegetable and fruit vendors and other trolleys and mini-vans for eateries.

This place is always illuminated with smal bulbs, CFLs and lighting equipments. All in all, a very very busy place.

That day, when I was coming back, I saw everything dark and desolate. Moving ahead, I noticed some vendors quickly rapping things up, putting their vegetables and fruits back into a sack and trying to run away as soon as possible. Advancing further, I spotted Municipality's trucks and cranes, with about 12-13 trollies dumped into the truck. I realized that it was illegal to sell their stuffs at that place. But then, since this is India, more than 90% of things happen illegally.

What I feel is - even if Municipality was right in punishing those vendors for the illegal road-blocking and crowding that place, I argue that at least these guys are working hard to earn some money. There are many in this country who are looting the wealth of common man, whether they are politicians, criminals many officials, etc. Everyone knows that they are doing such things, but there is no effort stopping those already too rich people.

Municipality may retaliate back that they are doing their duty, and it is not their job to stop those rich corrupt guys, but then I don't think it is fair to stop people from hard working, even though it is not correct.

The only point I stop is when it is argued that for every business, you need to invest first. You have so much of expenses, of which, foremost are cost of goods and land expenses (like: rent). These vendors try to make profits without too much of expenses. This is actually wrong and unethical and illegal. Looking from this point, the Municipality seem right, but I also feel too helpless and clueless how to stop rich being corrupt, unethical and illegal.

A sensible post after long it seems :P

Merry Christmas

2010-12-24T22:34:00.002+05:30

When I am busy or have no internet access, I have plenty of things and topics to write on. But when finally I log into this, I am thinking hard what I actually I thought to write. Probably the reason I have become so infrequent. But then - every tunnel has the other lighted end.. Atleast I have not given up on writing :)

Okay, I shall try to begin. Monday, I was given my first feedback by Asif, for two completed projects. It was like... WOW!! There were 1-2 points I needed improvement, but overall, I knew I deserved it. But then, the next step really is to build up and improve on those two aspects. Business English is one of the aspect. I was so confident about my Business English because I used to rate myself as top 10 people in my college for this. But when I have landed up here in the industry, I can just have a pity on those who can not even write one proper sentence. I have actually been proven as a novice in this field, so...

But overall, I was too happy. This week has been tiresome. Loads of work finally. And I am actually enjoying it. When you don't want to return home even after 9 hours at office, this means either you have some problem at your home or/and you are enjoying your work and office. I thank The Smart Cube for this, and the people I work with. Sometimes, just feel if the best people in the world have been recruited into the Data Analytics team at The Smart Cube. hehe

It is the Christmas tomorrow. And I complete 5 months too. That 1 month in Rewa was like 1 year, and these 5 months have passed just like 5 days. We had a Christmas celebration today. Amazing!!

Merry Christmas!!

Sachin - 50th Ton

2010-12-19T20:51:00.002+05:30

He has done it. HE HAS DONE IT.

Not writing anything else... I am just a mortal to write anything about GOD.. Happiest day in my life.

SIR SACHIN HAS DONE IT. TAKE A BOW

Just want to provide the link to this video

http://www.espncricinfo.com/india/content/video_audio/493435.html

and to this amazing gallery - to be cherished all the life

http://www.espncricinfo.com/india/content/gallery/485141.html

Somethings about ME

2010-11-24T12:26:00.004+05:30

I lack Patience.
I am confident of doing anything alone. When there is a dependency on someone else for certain thing to happen, I fail there. Means, I am only self-capable. This is the biggest reason I do not have a girl friend. Coz, although I can try my best, the result depends on the "other" person.
I am highly committed to the service towards my parents. And I feel proud to be my mummy's boy.
I love to excel, but as point #1 says, I want success immediately.
I love to be best left alone. I don't like a company of too many people.
I put up best with older people. I feel intimidated with outgoing people of my age, as I feel uncomfortable. Frequencies don't match.
I don't like to speak too much with guys. But I am always short of words when speaking to a girl and I don't really know how much should I speak to her, and when should I stop.
I wish to have a knowledge of each and everything possible - not necessarily in detail.
Though this one is common, I like to be famous. Comparing this with the statement above of being alone, I like to be famous, then have plenty of fan-following, but I still like to be left alone.
I loveeeee slim girls with long hair :)
I plan about each and every thing way in advance. And have about 2-3 back-up plans for everything. By 'each and every', I also mean that I plan for my breakfast/lunch/dinner way in advance, how much I am going to spend on what, even travelling, food, etc. I also use about 4-5 hours a day Planning.
I like to keep my surroundings clean.
I don't like to travel, in the first place. And if it is required, I never wish to travel with heavy luggage.
I can waste hours chatting - but I feel watching a movie is a wastage of precious 2 hours of my life. And I never play computer games.
Mathematics is my passion.
I want lots of money - just because I want to give luxuries to my parents, want to do charity work, want to make lives of my favorite people awesome and want to have a super duper wedding :P (I also want to make a trip to New Zealand/Switzerland)
Finally, I am more than satisfied with my life, just one special person is missing. :)

Mistakes

2010-11-23T15:59:00.002+05:30

I don't believe in astrology. These sun-signs, moon-signs, palm-reading, etc. are beyond my philosophy of acceptance. I have always believed that everything is pre-written and no one knows about this, not even 'your stars'. I agree that this is also a kind of science and many such instances have been proved, yet I don't WANT to believe.

I am a Piscean. I was casually browsing through internet, I thought of just taking a quick look what stars say about this sun-sign. I found this, "Pisceans can be described as emotional, romantic, dreamer, imaginative, honest, receptive, generous and affectionate. They are selfless and compassionate".

Well, it is upto you guys who know me well, to decide if these traits fit on me. But I would stumble upon one of these to highlight - being a Dreamer. Yes. It is more than 100% true about me. I am a dreamer and a heavy one. On an average, I spend about 4-5 hours dreaming a day. Dreaming can be about anything, but mostly it is planning the best ways I can keep my parents super happy. Starting with this link, the dreaming connects many untouched imaginations.

How can I keep them happy? Obviously, the materialism doesn't work on parents, it can work on wife/girlfriends/other relatives. Being there with one's parents in their old age and loving them unconditionally are the only two ways in which one can keep them happy. If someone needs to go a bit ahead, like I do, money comes into play.

I dream of living and spending my life with them. Though it is next to impossible, yet I am trying each and every possible way I can. Based in Lucknow, they would never come to settle in Delhi or somewhere else. Papa has spent about 30 years in Lucknow and his work is based there. Okay, I might persuade him to stop working and relax now as I am capable enough to provide them luxuries for rest of their lives. But will someone be able to leave the place they have been living for so long so easily and that too in this age? He has his friends and social network there, here is will be alone only with my mummy. Now??

Okay assuming he agrees to come. Am I capable enough at present to be the breadwinner of the family? Obviously not. I have been into work for only 4 months. It would take another 2 years to reach that stage of life. But 2 is also an assumtion too soon. To do this within 2 years, I need to earn a lot lot and lot. And I am ready to do anything for it, obviously in the right way.

I know I can study a lot, work very hard and be sincere. IIMs and ISBs, GMATs and CATs, CFAs and Actuaries, don't horrify me. I have self belief in myself. I know I can do it. But then the biggest questions are - WHAT and WHEN?

I have a dubious history of always taking a wrong decision in life, though, by God's grace, he has never let me fail in whatever I chose to do. If I start, my first mistake could be well back when I was in class 9th. I had an option to choose a 6th subject, and I chose Commerce over Computers, even when I was so good at it till 8th. The reason was that I heard Commerce is full of Maths, which was my first love. Without digging deep into research, I enrolled for Commerce and missed studying C++ (Computer language)

Though, I scored well in Boards in commerce, yet I never enjoyed that subject. Came class 11th and we had to choose 5th subject. It was made very clear - those who had Computers in 9th and 10th, will be allowed to take it; all else will have to take the alternative, which was Hindi. Hindi?? I thought to myself. What would I do opting for Hindi in my Intermediate? Instead, I pleaded my Computer teacher to let me take that subject. She agreed on the condition that I will have to get great marks in 1st terms. And I got 5.5/40. I was just next to be thrown out, when luck shone on me and I was AIR 22 and UP Rank 2 in Cyber Olympiad - the result announced the same day when I was just about to make an exit forever from the Computer lab and the subject. Cyber Olympiad's incharge was my Computer teacher, luckily. She was so happy with me that I made her believe that it was just a chance I couldn't perform well in the 1st term, and promised her to improve the next time.

I never quite got to understand JAVA, doing it without C++, for the 2 years stint with the course. The only program I could succesfully and again luckily make was at the Boards. I got 92/100 in Boards in this, I don't know how.

My next biggest mistake was taking a drop to prepare for Engineering Entrance Exams. I casually studied during the entire year, it was like taking a one year break from my life. And then too, Engineering, which later proved to be not my cup of tea. It was just I followed the herd, and wasted my life. After just 18 months into engineering, I knew I can not be an engineer. Stastitcs was the way I needed to go, but I never knew anything about that line. But then again, luckily, without studying my final GPA was 8.1/10.

The next biggest mistake was to enroll myself in Dual Degree Management course, that too from an unknown college. Though, I was on track of studying something which I loved - Finance, I couldn't land up with a good job. I did not even try after I was recruited at Jaypee Cements. I resigned from there in a month - my best decision ever and was greatly fortunate to have landed up here at The Smart Cube. Now I don't know whether I am on the right way or not, but what I know is that my path still is very very long.

Now even CFA doesn't seem enough. I have to re-plan everything from scratch, because what I want to do, I am not doing, though enjoying a lot. Very tough decisions to take. And I know I have deviated from the topic I started with, but more or less, as the changed title of my blog says, this is just a reflection of my within. Only for me to read in my coming years. Only as a memory :)

For memories are the only thing which never change with time, rest all changes.

Sachin - the man who we all want to be

2010-10-26T12:34:00.005+05:30

Although the original version of this line is by Andrew Symonds, this applies generally to every alive creature in this world - irrespective of caste, color and creed. There is a well known proverb - "Nothing is perfect", but there is also an equally generally accepted truth - "Exceptions are always there" and here we have Sachin Tendulkar as an exception to the former proverb.

Yet, Symonds made a mistake in his line - Sachin is not a human. It is not for nothing He is called God. Critics argue that we shouldn't term a normal human being as a God and it is a disrespect to the Almighty and blah blah. My version is - God is perfect, and so is Sachin. Even Gods were once humans living on this Earth. And same goes with Sachin.

He has all the attributes in him which makes him equal to be regarded as one. Who in this world would possess such a charisma which can bring smiles on the faces 1.2 billion humans together (and to this, I have put geographical constraints)? Who would have influence to bind all Indians together, which even 'real' Gods fail to do? Who would have the power to demolish the demons (read: opponents) on his will and that too, so easily and artistically? Who would have the access to all the materialistic luxuries in the world yet has renounced them and just concentrate on the task he has been allotted by the Supreme? Who would possess the power to uplift the down-trodden, be the source of the light to those in the darkness and be the 'one who everybody wants to be' yet no one can?

In Matty Hayden words - "I have seen God, he bats at no. 4 for India". It is not something to be surprised of, or rather unreal. Again in some other words - "God wanted to play cricket, so he came down on Earth in the form of Sachin". Compare this to the olden times when God sent Ram and Krishna on Earth for a motive, similarly I feel God has sent Sachin for the same. If Ram and Krishna are Gods, why can't be Sachin?

Back on the lines of the topic, everyone of us wants to be like Sachin, yet no one actually can. So, we humans just try to be a fraction of him - say 5% or 10%. Just try to imbibe a handful of his quality and claim yourself to be someone really good a person. One can either be super successful in his respective field, or still think he is a student of the work he has already mastered himself in, or be too humble after being hailed as a deity, or not to fall into the materialistic trap, or be a super patriot, or always successful in rising from the ashes, or being a motivating factor in the lives of plenty, etc etc.. the list never ends.

One of the biggest point - who would have a power to be bigger than his field of service (cricket)? People may accept it or not, but half of the Indians love cricket because of Sachin and intend to leave watching the game when he quits, just because they never loved the game but they loved the person (God) because of whom that game is still alive.

Fell in the Wall

2010-10-25T01:06:00.003+05:30

The title might bewilder you. Ya, I know the correct one should be "Fell in the well", but let me build up the story.

The title I first thought to put up was "Rafting Expedition", but that would sound quite boring, isn't it? But now many of you must have guessed, I had been to the Rafting expedition for the last three days. It was sponsored by my company, The Smart Cube, and the experience had been the best and the most awesome one in my entire life.

To begin with, I was sent an invitation to go to the Shivpuri Rafting expedition as soon as I joined the company. I didn't have much clue then, so I just accepted it and was excited about it. But since I am an introvert person, I just didn't feel like going there and mixing with people, as I had only 2 of my friends accompanying on the trip out of 45. I was given an option, either to find an alternative for myself, or pay the entire money (we were supposed to pay only Rs. 1200 for the whole trip, just 20% of the total).

I couldn't find an alternative and didn't want to waste Rs. 6000 so finally reluctantly I went for the trip. We boarded the bus from the company itself on Thursday 21st Oct 2010 night and reached Shivpuri by morning 7 am. There were loads of tents all around in the beach near the Ganges river there (actually, it has all been commercialized now, every beach has been taken up by some or the other organizing companies)

We were told about the itinerary in advance. The first day we rafted about 12 kms. For all who do not know the basics of rafting, there is a raft, in which 8 of us sit, 4 on each side. We were given life jackets, helmets and paddles to row. The water was still at most places and also there was a 'rapid' at some places. These rapids are dangerous and more than that, they are fun. The raft sways in the midst of these rapids and it is always a possibility for it to flip.

The first day, there were minor rapids, although the first one was a bit exciting because it was the first one [:P]. Second day, we rafter about 25 kms, from Shivpuri to Rishikesh (uptil Laxman Jhoola). There were two rapids more than the previous day - Roller Coaster and Golf course. Roller coaster was the first dangerous rapid we faced. One of the guys from our raft actually flipped and well in water (ofcourse he was pulled back!!)

Golf Course was even more dangerous, and I was sitting at the frontmost position during that rapid. There are various commands given by the guard in our raft which we need to follow, and the intensity of those commands increased when we were in the rapid. But at that time, we could hardly hear any command because of the noise of the water and because of the panic. I got two slaps from the high tide but somehow, we all survived and nobody fell. It was a very great experience.

The last day, we had to cross the most dangerous and heaviest of all the rapids - The Wall. We were told stories that mostly rafts flip in those. It became very scary even before entering the river. I was sitting at the second in the left. There were 6 rafts and ours were at 4th position (there was no competition). When we were just about to enter The Wall, I saw the first raft has flipped. It became scarier. One of the raft had already flipped. We could be the next or the next or the next.

We entered the rapid. It all became horrifying. The water pressure was too much. It tilted our raft towards the right. I happened to see that one guy from our raft fell in water, two got dis-balanced, but somehow came back. We were rotated completely 180 degrees and were facing in the opposite direction. And just when it seemed we came back in control, another tide came, hit the raft and suddenly we all slipped, though the raft didn't flip.

Next I could feel I was in the water, hit by the Wall, trapped by the Wall. Somehow, I seemed the only one who didn't lose concentration. I kept in mind to keep holding the tight rope on the sides of the raft when submerging. That looked like impossible when the distance kept on increasing and I was just going inside and inside. But I gathered all my energy in my fore-finger and just hooked on to the rope. After about 10 seconds, I could come up. I noticed my right leg also got entangled in the rope. Although it saved me that time, but it is paining too much that I wish to amputate it. :(

The guide kept on pulling all of us up back in the raft whoever got slipped. Later on, we were told that 7 out of 8 of us were in the water. 3 out of those 7 had lost the vicinity of the raft even, though 4 of the remaining of us were around the raft so were pulled back. Those 3 guys were rescued by other rafts. Just when we were back in the raft and were gaining breathes, we were asked to row again quickly, to get to the shore as soon as possible. But all of us had lost our peddles in the battle with the Wall. Somehow, 3 of us could get back our peddles and a job which has to be done by 8, was now being done by 3 totally injured chaps (including me).

Anyways, we reached the shore. All were safe. We took a 5 min break before heading towards our destination. Finally, we reached our camp place back, had shower, had lunch and way back to Delhi.

Overall, the trip was toooooo much of a fun. The best experience I could ever ever had in my life. Who would intentionally go into Ganges, that too in Rishikesh/Shivpuri where the flow is so fast? Only the trips like these make one shed all the fear (even I was hydrophobic before the trips to Sattal and now Shivpuri, but feel to comfortable in water now).

There are many things I would never forget, from this trip. I got to gel with most of the guys from my company, whom I didn't even know before. And obviously the rafting experience. We also played volleyball there on the beach. And the tents, the sand and then the most irritating of all - the dry pit toilets. I would not like to tell about those, who wish to know - Google it. Its really worth knowing :P

I would thank The Smart Cube for arranging such kind of trips. I look forward to more of them in the coming months. Still in the memories of The Wall -- Gudnite. Tomorrow is office and its 2 am :)

The miseries and the longing

2010-09-22T22:02:00.002+05:30

Sometimes things do not go in your favor at all. Everything seems to be irritating, dull, monotonous and you just feel helpless. Today was one such day, but not the only day. I know such kind of days are lined up for me to face.

I am not giving the entire schedule of what happened today. It was just like I started the day at 7:30 am and its 10 pm now. For all this time, I have been on the run, working something somewhere or the other. From cooking breakfast to lunch, working in office and handling pressures and boring data, walking kilometers in the rain because of lack of conveyance facility, shopping at 9:15 pm, cleaning utensils and now... studying remains. I even could not find time to go to the temple even on this Anant Chaudas day. Feels pathetic!!

It is not that I am complaining of the tough schedule or I want to run away. I can, any day, hire a cook or a maid, who can take care of these extra things, but I don't want to. I want to take on pressures and challenges. But what I lack is, when I come back home at 10pm, I want someone to whom I can pour my irritation out, with whom I can share the daily events, to whom I can look forward for mental support, who can listen to me and divide my burden mentally...

This is not desperation, but I miss a girl-friend. I miss someone as a support system. Mummy can't always listen to all these, nor I want to tell her my problems, because then she also gets tensed. I know that from A to Z, it is me only who has to do all the work - even whether it is taking care of spiders and lizards to be thrown out of home to clean the floors to slab to cupboard to changing bedsheets to dry clothes and so on and on and on...

People sympathize with those working women who are earning to support their family. I can recall my Taiji saying about my Bhabhi that she is so hard-working that she prepares food for the family before leaving for the office and does the same after returning. At that time, I also seconded here. But I don't think this is a big deal. I am not being specific, but atleast she has family members with her to support. I am all alone.

I also find myself changed a lot. And this change is for good. I had never purchased vegetables and fruits in my life before, never eaten cream (malai), had hundreds of excuses for not eating various things. But now, everything is done. Like it is said, by hook or by crook. I have no other option, but to do them. Sometimes, I feel proud of myself. Sometimes, I just feel to low. I need motivation.

I want to get married. :(

I know this is stupid. Forget it!! Just momentary :P

Feel better after sharing all these thoughts here. 45 min of study now, then have to sleep. Have to get up early tomorrow :(

CFA Level 1 - the journey

2010-09-20T22:18:00.002+05:30

This post has been delayed by about two months. Call it lack of interest or shortage of time. This one covers my journey from hearing about what CFA is and then finally clearing it.

Chartered Financial Analyst. The first source from where I got to hear this word was from Prachi Bhabhi. On Gtalk, we were discussing what financial courses can be done after MBA. She told me about 2-3 different courses and I further tried to investigate about each. After consulting with Kushal and Prof G.K. Agarwal, I decided to take a plunge and register for the level 1 of this esteemed certification.

Actually, it was not because I wanted to specialize in Finance or go for further certifcation courses to add to my skill set. But I went for this exam because at the back of my mind I knew that MBA from JBS, and that too a dual degree program, would never help me to get a good job. The placement scenario was also too bad, with the MBA students getting a mere 2.0 lpa salary on an average. And this, when my fellow B.Tech friends started with 3.3 lpa. It would have been an utter shame if I ended up like that.

I knew if I clear CFA level 1, it would enhance my Resume and atleast I would get a better entry in the corporate world. Also, CFA level 1 would, kind of, provide a cover to the blemish on my Resume about the university I post-graduated from.

The fees was too much (about Rs. 60000). I knew my father would never decline my request about financing me for this. Even in the most critical financial condition at home, he has never declined to fund me for my studies. When I approached him with this idea, he just asked me to confirm about the authentication of exam and about my passion and willingness to study to clear it. Since the historical pass rate was just around 40%, it was going to be very difficult.

In around December, I finally registered for the exam going to take place in June, i.e., 6 months down the lane. Two weeks later, a 7 kg carton full of 6 thick but awesome books (in appearance) were delivered at my home in Lucknow. I was in the college (Noida) that time, so my sister and parents unwrapped it. The first comment from my mother was - beta 6 moti moti books hain, tu shayad hi khatam kar payega sab.

I told Gaurangi about my registration. She gave one of the scariest scolding to me. She was like - "Have you gone crazy? Registered for something like CFA?? You could never complete the course. You should have asked me atleast once before doing that." On the contrary to being nervous and angry, I got excited to catch a glimpse of those books, which my sister mentioned, had very shining and beautiful cover pages. When in the first week of January I went home, I saw them. They were really tempting to be read, but when I looked at the course content, I was 99% sure that I can not finish the entire course unless my MBA gets over in a month or so.

I brought first two books with me. The Director of our college had announced that our MBA would get over by 15th Feb, so I set a target that I have to complete the two books by then. I started with full passion, but that died away in just a couple of days. The books were now merely a show piece, which I used to show to every friend of mine, just for making them awestruck and praise me (felt nice when they think that I am doing something too great, but in reality, I wasn't even trying to do anything).

Gradually, the days passed by. Mrityunjay was to be my new roomie from 1st Feb. Till Yuvraj was there as the roomie, I knew I could never study. With Mrits, it would be far easier. Hence I postponed my commencement till 1st Feb. Meanwhile, the last date of MBA shifter to 15th March. This proved to be my new deadline.

I pulled out the 1st book to be kept beside me always. I used to keep it near me, so that I get an encouragement to pick it up and read. But I could do it only for an hour just before going to bed. 5 pages per day would be my speed, and that too the portion which I already knew - Statistics. To make things worse, my friends asked me to enjoy the last few days of college life. I agreed. The book was closed and kept back in the cupboard.

That didn't come out till MBA finally got over on 30th March. In the meantime, I got a placement with Jaypee Cements. This relieved every kind of pressure I was in to clear the CFA. I thought to just vaguely give it a try. If I pass, very good. But if I don't, it hardly matters. I even went to the extent to think that there would only be a monetary loss which I could cover with just 2 months salary. Pathetic!!

Anyways, I began studying from April 1. Slowly and gradually the train moved. Started with only about 2 hours a day. The only good thing was that I always followed the study schedule I had made for myself. The bad thing was I proved to be a miser in this, keeping just half or 1 chapter to be finished in a day.

Again, time passed like sand in the fist. I was no where to complete even my first book. By the 11th or 12th April, I managed to complete the half of it (postponed the first half - Ethics - for the last). It was a great feeling to come to the second book, Finally. Economics it was. Basically, this is a preliminary course taught in every B-school. But ours was a little different. We never studied Economics. It was the first time I was going through its concepts and was feeling alien to many of them.

I was always motivated by my family, Kushal, Riki and Mayur. These people made me move forward always. Arunesh, on the other hand, was always negative. He even gave a new full form to CFA - Care Free Attitude. But I always knew, he never meant it. It was his way to motivate me - ki saale padh le.

The names I mentioned above are just a small percent of people behind my success. Although I cannot mention everyone's name, but there was motivation all around. One by one I was completing the books, not realizing that none of the content was going in my mind. And suddenly, amidst all this, a twist took place. Tauji suffered with a brain hemorrhage. It disturbed my studies a lot. Papa said we all need to go to Gwalior. I could not help it. I didn't know what to do. At that point, I realized there was no point dragging it further, I can never clear this exam now.

Kajal, Riki and other friends were my pillar of strength apart from my mummy. During the preparations, I had travelled around 3 times to and fro to Gwalior, sometimes, even no return tickets. All surmounted to the growing pressure. I studied even in train - upper berth, side bert, 2S coach and what not. Even in dimmest of the light, on the balcony at 6 am in Gwalior when everybody was asleep, amidst cherubic but noisy presence of my 7 year old cousins and so on...

When in Lucknow, I shifted my schedule entirely. I used to sleep at 2 pm, wake up at 8 pm. My dinner became by breakfast, breakfast turned into lunch and lunch was my dinner. Overnight studies were the only option, owing to the noise made by children in the apartment all throughout the day - and obviously those irritating vehicles, mummy's soaps, papa's phone calls, etc etc.

During the night to keep me awake, I had companions in Ahinsa and Rashi. Ahinsa's job shift was 3pm to 1 am, so when she returned from the office, we used to do some SMS Chat. I got a break from the continuous studies from that. Rashi, on the other hand, was preparing for her CA exams so she also up the entire night.

Tauji expired on 15th May, and although it struck as a trauma to the family, I tried my best to keep myself in control. The final two weeks were here. Realizing that still there was much to do, I increased my working hours - even stretched them to 14 hours per day during the final few days. The sweetest, motivating and encouraging SMSs I received from my friends really were a blessing.

Finally, I dragged and completed my preparations - just one day in advance. We all (family) went to Delhi, where the center was. We stayed at Bua nani's place, even there I studied in the toughest conditions till 1 am just before the exams. The final glimpse of the FSA was necessary. This topic I could never master. And then, the final exam day.

I had booked a cab to drop me to my center, which was in Greater Noida. The first half of the exam went superb and my confidence level increased, but I felt I screwed the second half. It was a little difficult and trickier, and the 2 hour break in between made me feel sleepy. However, at 5 pm, I finished with the exam and came back.

At night at about 11 pm, I had my train to Rewa, as my joining date was two days after my exam date (8th June). And the rest is history - the stay at Rewa.

Finally, on 26th July, which was also my first day at The Smart Cube, the result was out. They had mailed us the result, and I had passed the CFA Level 1 with more than 70% in all the 10 subjects of the course. My happiness knew no bounds.

And here I am, thinking of those days, those pains, those sweats, the way in which I had never studied in my entire life. I would like to specially thank Kushal (for always motivating me, providing me with some links to help prepare and moreover, guide me all the way about what CFA actually is when I was researching), Niki Di - for providing me with that PDF, without which I could never even imagine to pass, my sister - always the best and the greatest source of motivation, Rashi, Arunesh, Ahinsa, Shubham, Prachi Bhabhi (without whom I would have never known about this exam), Pankaj Vajpayee Sir, Vadehra Sir (both for teaching their course fantastically, which reduced my studying time for these courses during my preparation) and Riki.

And above all, my Mummy and Papa.

Well this post comes on a day, when I am commencing the Level 2 preparation. I have about 8 months in hand, but with the job in hand, it will be difficult to study now. I just hope I clear this too.

Trip to Sattal

2010-09-16T23:09:00.003+05:30

The increasing work load is not allowing me to pen down anything here. Lots of topics have accumulated in the pending section and are near to its expiry date. Before it is too late that I forget, let me write something about me recent trip to Sattal (pronunciation: Saat-taal)

Well, it was an outbound training to Sattal, a place 23 kms from Nainital in Uttarakhand. The trip was organized by our company itself and it was compulsory to attend it. Having been heard about these 'outbound trips' since the day I joined The Smart Cube, it was never clear why such kind of activities are carried on in a company dedicated to research work. What would they attain making us do rigorous physical exercises with respect to the kind of work we do in our company? Even parents, relatives and friends - all asked the same question, but alas! I had no answer.

Mummy Papa had come to my new flat during those days. It was planned that they would stay over the weekend, but this Sattal plan disturbed all previously scheduled plans. We (the company companions) were to leave for Sattal on 2nd September night, so mummy papa also left the same day around same time. The joy that I had got my first salary the same day could not be fully celebrated because of this ruckus.

We reached the Old Delhi station and I met new faces, which I had never seen before in the company. Actually, my company's office is located on tow floors (4th and 5th). I am on 4th and never get a chance to go to the 5th and meet people there. On the trip, we were 18 guys, 3 from my floor and 15 unknown faces from the 5th floor.

We gelled up well in the train itself, though I was feeling slightly uncomfortable. I have realized that I am a very introvert person. I don't like to speak much amongst strangers. Nevertheless, we played few games inside the train, disturbing all the fellow passengers for whom that journey would be no less than a nightmare.

Reached Pathankot early morning and jeeps were already arranged to take us too terrible place called Sattal. I say terrible because we were to stay not in some hotel rooms but tents. It was a camp and the conditions were unfavorable. No electricity was provided to us.

I kept my bag in the tent. Tents do not have locks, so I was apprehensive regarding the security. But then my friend said, "abe yaha chor bhi aake survive nahi kar sakta". There was a assembling point, some 100 meters from the tent area where we all gathered always and had various activities.

The first day we were told that they had planned swimming for us in an 80 ft deep lake. Now that I was hydrophobic, even imagining that lake gave tremors to me. We descended some steep mountains and after travelling about 2 kms, we reached the lake. There was life jacket provided. We were divided into groups of six and were given the task to reach the center of the lake first in team. I jumped into the water taking God's name. For the first 5 minutes, I felt this is my last day today. And when I was just getting hold on my fear of water, my body gave up. I found no energy in myself to swim across when every body else had literally completed the task.

Somehow, I managed to reach the center after a lot of effort and help from the local trainers. But then, the fear vanished and I started enjoying the activity and liking the swimming a lot. It was this situation that we were asked to come back, but I didn't feel like. Anyhow, we swam back.

Going up the hill back to the camp area was tough now. Tired of swimming, walking against the gravity took toll on legs. Almost everybody had got some cramps at any part of the body. I had it in my back. After reaching mid-way, we were given lunch (which was pathetic by my standards). I didn't have much of it. Meanwhile, the bodies got a little rest and we managed to go back a little comfortably.

After coming back, there was a feedback session. Everyone was expected to tell his/her experience of the whole activity. During the night, it was all fun. Camp fire was there, and we had been given the task for the next day, to which everyone was busy planning. We had to climb the toughest mountain in the area. It was told to be the most challenging task, because in addition to this, we were to cook food above. And there would be NOTHING provided there. All of the stuff (utensils, vegetables, ingredients, oil, water, etc) we had to take with us from the camping place itself. It meant, along with us, we had to carry those heavy things too.

That literally was one of the most challenging activity I would have ever done. I was carrying a container sort of thing and a polybag with me. Both the hands occupied, it was a nightmare going up. Twice I slipped and was just about to fall in the abyss. I felt throwing that stuff away and just concentrate on climbing, but somehow kept my cool and patience.

We all reached the top somehow. All broken, some girls crying, some about to faint, we reached the place and began planning cooking. It was a wonderful experience, a joint effort; and within 3 hours, a delicious meal was ready. And it was really delicious.

Going back was far easier. If climbing up took us 1.5 hours, down the hill journey was just of 15-20 min. And our next task was ready for us - Kayaking. It was the second day and it was decided that we would be practicing how to kayak that day and would be holding some game based on it the next day. For all those (like me) who has heard this word Kayaking for the first time, just google it out.

Satnaam was my partner. Again, it was a heavy toll on the body. After about 10 min, I was unable to hold the peddle properly. I struggled a lot during the practice, and the fear of the kayak flipping over was horrifying. Somehow, managed to reach the shore back after kayaking for about 40 min.

Then a very strange kind of task was kept. We were formed in groups of two each. It was mostly a guy with a girl (until the stock of the girls got finished - 11:7 ratio). I was teamed with Sumit Kaur. The task was that we would be climbing back to the camp area in pairs, but one of the person would be blindfolded, and the other person has to guide him/her. The catch was, the blindfolded person would not utter a single word and the guide would have to keep on narrating something or the other about himself/herself and never anything about the path. After mid-way, the roles were to be reversed. It was a very interesting task. Sumit was a nice girl to be with, to know her. She got tired mid way, but I kept my cool and we managed to complete the task easily.

Later that night, again the music and all made environment light. I got to play the naal (naal was arranged by the localites). And came back to tent by 11, and had a sound sleep. The weather made things a little easier.

Next day in the first half, we had a kind of indoor activity. Means we were grouped in team of 8 each (2 not taking part) and we had to draw some part of the panorama on a piece of individual paper and that part would have to form a part of a bigger picture. It was a good task and we enjoyed a lot.

We were asked to pack our bags before going down for the Kayaking game as we won't be coming back to the campsite again and will directly be going to the station after the activity. It was a kind of relief for all of us. Anyways, we went down. I was very scared because I knew about the game. It was like - one person will be blindfolded and he would be peddling. The other person would be the guide, as to directing the peddler where to go, and the guide had to collect balls floating in the lake. Since the team had an equal number of boys and girls, I knew the boys would be blindfolded.

Co-coincidently, Sumit was my partner again. She was more terrified than me. Anyhow, we began our task. I couldn't see anything and was just hearing and concentrating on the instructions given by her - "Right, left, right, left, forward, right...." My energy was giving way, but feeling what a girl would think if I say I am not able to peddle any more. Somehow, we completed the task. And completed??? Faaaaaaad diya task ko. There were three teams, going after 27 balls in the water. And guess what, our team collected 19 out of them. The organizers were telling me that it was a new record held ever at Sattal.WOOOOOWWWW!!!

And then we finally changed and headed towards the station. In the train, I got a good companion in Karan to discuss Sachin and Rahman. At about 12, we slept and reached Delhi at about 8, train being 3 hours late. And then by 11:30a, OFFICE. Yes, OFFICE even after working this much. Hehe

Now, the big question. What did we gain out of this? Well, at the end of the camp, it became clear. It was instilling courage, teamwork, doing something which you would have never done, trusting the partners, etc etc etc packed with loads of fun. After about each activity, we were made to relate the experience with the projects we would be doing in the company. It was all HR thing.

The post got just bigger. I think I should pause here. Will be back with the next one soooon. I feel two posts in a week I would like to target. Because many a things are still pending and I haveeeeeeeeeee to write about them for sure. Cya!!!

200* and 3 years of wonderful exp

2010-08-19T21:12:00.003+05:30

Ideally, this post should have been posted yesterday. There is a double celebration as this blog had completed 3 years yesterday and this is my 200th post.

On September 28th 2008, I had come up with the 100th post. It gives immense happiness and satisfaction when one achieves such a milestone and with huge reader base ofcourse. But with time, I slowed down, changed my style, changed my theme and changed my target audience.

If you go through my 100th post, I had thanked several of you readers with some of their most memorable comments for me. That was the time when I was at peak of my writing. But other things took over, people as well as I got busy in my life and ended up with having no or little time to write. Thus, what is took only 13 months to write 100 posts, it has been now 23 months for the next 100.

And if you look at the content, at that time the posts comprised everything like poems, humourous stories, figment of imaginations, social causes, etc. But recently, I have cut down to only writing my life experiences and sharing with all of you, so that you don't make the same mistakes I had made, you can follow the same path I followed (incase I got success by it), you get saved from some trauma and torture I went through by making some right decisions, etc. And above all, I write my personal experiences for the sake of re-reading them after, say 25-30 years. What pleasure it will give. My children and grand children will have a great chance to know about my life :P :P

Coming to the writing style, I used to focus on the grammar as well as vocabulary during those times. I still remember using dictionary and thesaurus frequently. But now, it has been just plain English, with no glossy words. Grammar has taken a back seat and vocabulary I have completely forgotten.

About the target audience, at those times there were real readers, who praised my writing skills and I used to feel on top of the world. But gradually, reader got bored. I am not J.K Rowling or Chetan Bhagat that people would WAIT for my next posting. With diminishing readers and applauders, I changed my target audience to those who really want some kind of help or guidance.

And lastly, the template has been changed. :P

Well, in my 100th post, I thanked so many of you. Of late, I don't know how many of you still follow my posts regularly. I again would like to mention few names, of late who had really made a difference in my life in some way or the other.

First one ofcourse is Arunesh. And for sure, I know he WILL NOT be reading this post. So, not much tareef of him here :P

Then there are ofcourse Mayur and Riki. Said a lot about you guys in other posts, so would refrain myself here. hehe.

Uttam, you comments in the last post really made my day and it was only because of that comment that I was encouraged to write this post.

Pratyush, I know you will not be able to read this as this is blocked at Infosys, but without mentioning your name, this list can never be completed.

Ruchir, thanks for that comment bhai. I expect you will keep on reading in future too without getting bored :P

Finally, thanks to each and everyone who visits this place even rarely or by mistake clicks on my link. I plan to keep my style, target audience and theme same for the next 100 posts too. :)

P.S. : If you count my posts, this is 197th. 3 posts were migrated to http://blog.vaibhavjain.net but because of "lack of funds", this blog was shut down and my posts died forever.

Jaypee Business School's reputation

2010-08-17T21:20:00.004+05:30

Guys, this is just for a quick wake-up call for all the students of Jaypee Business School.

As you all know, I was hired by The Smart Cube for the position of Analyst around a month back. I had to compete with students of IIT and DCE. It is not that I was afraid or got subdued by them, but their mere college reputation outscored me heavily. Yet, I somehow managed to clear it.

Anyways, yesterday I got to know from a colleague of mine who was talking to my unit head (we don't have the concept of 'boss' in our company), who said to her, "Vaibhav is from a not-so-good college but we hired him because his logical thinking is good".

Now what I want you guys to focus is on the former part, ignore the latter part. This sentence is not quoted here to boast about myself but as a wake up call. Those who are unaware of JBS's reputation in the corporate world may estimate it by this.

I just want to make a point here that don't think that a degree of MBA from JBS would fetch you a good job. Rather, build in yourself a skill or a core competency that would elevate you to a level of the students from premier colleges like IIM, etc. Just by having an MBA degree from this college is not enough.

Study hard whatever is being taught, don't take studies lightly (especially Finance students), do something "extra" (as they say, WALK THE EXTRA MILE) which will differentiate you from the general lot.

JBS is new, it will definitely come out as a good B-School, but it will take time. But the current batches have no other option rather than what I have mentioned above. Hope you take notice of this. All the best.

List of KPO in NCR

2010-08-12T21:58:00.003+05:30

Guys, due to strong demand and probable need for this, I am posting here a list of Knowledge Process Outsourcing (KPO) companies in NCR (Noida, Delhi, Gurgaon, Greater Noida). I found these companies during my search for a job. The list is, ofcourse, not exhaustive, so if you know any other, please feel free to post it in the comments section and I would update it.

For the details, google these companies out.

Evalueserve
The Smart Cube
Copal Partners
WNS Global
Pipal Research
Market RX (pharmaceutical mainly)
Grail Research
Bain Capability Center
Futures First
Infosys
KPMG
Deloitte Touche Tomatshu
Inductis
AbsolutData
Office Tiger
Ernst and Young
Price Waterhouse Cooper
Mckinsey Knowledge Center
Watson Wyyat
Dunnhumby
EMB

@ The Smart Cube

2010-08-09T20:52:00.003+05:30

So.. about The Smart Cube now.

Joined TSC from 26th July. Came to Noida, and directly to Arunesh's place on 25th, and planned to stay there till I got a good accommodation. On the first day was just the orientation. Later in the day, I got my cubicle, e-mail ID, computer and all other basic requirements to work, which was missing there in Rewa. The very first day, I had my own stuff. The finance personnel introduced me to salary structure in detail, about how I can plan my salary structure and how much would I get in hand. This all can be customized according to my investments and claims to reimbursements. This again was missing from Jaypee where there was no transparency.

I started the work from Tuesday. Although, initial day was light as we had no work. On Wednesday, I got a basic excel-powerpoint work of an ongoing project. On Friday, another project. Saturdays and Sundays are off. Parents had come, so had a nice time. Meanwhile, couldn't find a decent place to live in.

The work is awesome here. The environment fabulous. No stretching unnecessarily. But would have to stretch when deadlines approach. But that is on your choice. Keep your work updated, and avoid unnecessary pressure. Our DA team comprises of 12 members and all our so nice and helpful. It is said that this is the most cheerful team at TSC, always giggling and keeping the tensions at bay.

The pics are uploaded on Facebook. All those added in my list can view them. You will know what kind of amazing atmosphere prevails there. One of them is posted here. I say, pick any parameter of Jaypee, rotate it 180 degrees and you would find the atmosphere at TSC here. Awesome.

Meanwhile, I cleared CFA Level 1. Would be posting a separate post on that. That journey has also been amazing. :)

The journey to The Smart Cube

2010-08-06T09:27:00.003+05:30

I continue this post from where I left the last one.

The Smart Cube recruitment process

I reached Noida early in the morning and went to Arunesh's place directly. At 10, I was supposed to reach The Smart Cube building. I was in time. I would like to share the recruitment process with you so that you may have some guidelines which I couldn't.

There were three rounds in all. None was elimination. We were about 8 candidates (all male). The first round was written aptitude test, in which we had to attempt 30 questions in 25 minutes. There was negative marking. This may change because I heard other teams also had 100 questions, some had 50, etc. The questions were on similar pattern of CAT's Quant and DI.

The second round was interview. Since I had applied for the post of Data Analytics, two members from the DA team took my interview. It was of a mixed sorts - mainly based on case studies. There was one Maths question (make 29 using 4 3s and any mathematical operators). The conversation was also based on my past work experience, etc.

There was one more round of interview, taken over by Manager of DA group. It was mainly Maths puzzles, like make 4 ltr using measured containers of 3 and 5 ltrs only, or like how many handshakes will be there in all in a room of 10 people, all handshaking once with everyone, etc. etc. There was one question to which I could not answer -- why are manholes cover round?

The process went till 4 pm and finally I was asked to leave. They said they would tell the result either the next day or on Monday. Next day I went for another walk-in in RNCOS. They had no vacancies, so I came back. On Friday evening, impatiently, I called up the HR of The Smart Cube to know about the result, but she said that it would be out on Monday. I took the train back to Lucknow and reached home on Saturday morning.

Back to Lucknow

There were again discussions whether I need to pack bags and go to Rewa. I decided that I would wait for the TSC result. But when I called my boss at Jaypee Cements, he asked me to come by Monday otherwise no need to come. I was stranded. There were two possibilities. Say, I went to Rewa and then get selected. I would have been hard for me to come back to Noida. Or if I didn't go to Rewa and get eliminated, then I am jobless. I thought to adopt the latter option and wait for the CFA result which was due in next 7 days. I thought that if I get eliminated in TSC, I will have a better chance of getting a job if I clear CFA. But what if I could not even clear CFA? Means, no Jaypee, no TSC and no CFA. I'll be then a hopeless case searching for a job with a "Dual Degree Management" degree, of which majority hadn't even heard of. I had nothing to prove I am different from the lot. There have been many from my college still in search of jobs and getting nothing.

On Monday, I was very nervous. I expected their phone call or mail to drop in any time. I felt I had done good in the recruitment process, but you never know. My competitors were from IIT, DCE and experience holder of 2 years. And no one had heard of JBS (Jaypee Business School). On Monday, there was no e-mail and no phone call. Mummy said that might be I am not selected so they didn't bother to apprise me. I e-mailed them, asking for the result even if I am rejected. But no response.

By 7 pm, I assumed that I am rejected and looked forward to CFA result next Monday. On Tuesday, I went with my family to Malls and restaurant for fun as my sister was leaving for her college the next day. I came back at about 8 pm and checked my mail. And I was... WOWWW. I got a mail from TSC that I had been selected. My package was good, way beyond I was expecting. I was asked to join on Thursday, but I later on negotiated it for Monday. I was selected. Yippieeeeeeee... Can't describe my feelings in words.

Anyways, now the burden was removed. The best thing was that I didn't take help of my CFA. So there was no pressure of its result as well. Now the good things followed. Next day, I got a call from Copal Partners again, the HR saying that they made a mistake earlier and I had to appear for an interview once again. Now if some company is AGAIN calling me, means I have a great chance. But now, I wasn't interested. There package is not even 70% of TSC. Work environment I heard is not good, long working hours, too much of pressure, etc etc. Then, on Friday I got a call from WNS, the company I was desperately trying when in Rewa. But their package was only half of what I will be getting in TSC, so I rejected this one as well.

About TSC, will be followed in the next one.

The amazing journey

2010-08-05T22:41:00.002+05:30

Seems like ages have passed since the last post. No no. Don't count the number of days. But because of the simple fact, lots and lots have happened since then. There is too much to write. There always was, but time and energy never permitted. Let me begin then.

Jaypee, Rewa

Jaypee Rewa was always a very bad place to work with. In the last post, I highlighted some positives. But the reasons why I could stay there only for one month are as follows. The place is isolated. For a person who has been living in NCR for last year, or even Lucknow for his lifetime, won't be able to adjust to this kind of place to his willingness and comfort. Work was bad. I was given the task to collect requirements from various departments of the plant, send enquiries to 3-4 vendors of those items, get quotations from them, compare them, send the comparative statement to our senior GM, and as per his approval, make a Purchase Order for that vendor. And there was a target of making 10 Purchase Orders per day.

If this seems Okay, then the problem is -- we can never collect quotations from the vendors. They never send because they are never paid on time. Payment is delayed by more than several months. Then obviously, who would want to do business? Such is the condition.

So now, place bad, work bad. Next what? Food bad, accommodation bad. There was a small room - three were sharing. No AC no cooler. The condition was that when at lunch, I came sweating, it usually took me 30 min to dry it. And imagine, those were the best rooms there - the guest rooms. Food was pathetic. Chapatis turned rubber in 2 minutes. Dal was nothing more than colored water.

There was tiny particles of cement always flowing in the air. So literally, I was inhaling it always. Bad for my health. Temperature in June was always around 45 deg C. Since it was a plant, smoke was always there, which further contributed in temperature rise. Rewa was 20 kms from the plant, and there were few buses plying. The last bus from the plant was at 7:15pm and my office timing was 8 am to 8 pm. So no Rewa on weekdays.

About work, from 8 am to 11 am, we did nothing. All the shops opened at 11 am around, and it was then that business work began. So, all other departments get closed at 5:30, we worked till 8 pm. Not that I am complaining about the work, but the system is too faulty. Paper work all around. There is so much of paper wastage there, that about 5 packs of A-4 size sheets get used in one single day only in my department. For others, the count may be some. Too much of expectations without providing resources. Even my office had no AC or cooler. No cold water. Condition of washroom was pathetic. I tried my best never to enter it. Did just once :P

Overall, I knew I was not fit for the place. I was not like others, who ran after money. Jaypee offers great package even if you are not that skilled. That's why, people who knew they would get nothing better elsewhere, stick to the company and get rich. Savings at such a place was more than 80%. How hard you try, you could never spend more than Rs. 4-5K.

Everyday, I counted my days to CFA result. Though there were not many, but when a single minute seemed difficult to pass, I couldn't imagine to pass 45 days. On 7th July, I called up Copal Partners and luckily got an appointment fixed for the interview for 12th July. Though there was quite a gap, I left Rewa on 8th July itself and spent 3 idle days at Chandni Chowk.

I didn't resign but took a leave. I got it just of two days, that too when I made emergency excuses. I knew I don't have to go back, but there was always a question - what if I am rejected? If I had nothing in hand, I would have to go back. That increased the pressure. I tried to line as many interviews in the short stay there at Delhi, but couldn't make it possible. It seemed my terrible struggling days had begun. I was ready to face the opportunities. Carrying the document file in my hands and travelling in jam packed buses in the scorching heat with monsoons also coming up. This is what I chose my life to be.

Copal Partners, Gurgaon

12th July-- Copal Partners.

I had waited long for this day. I knew there was only a little probability to get through in the first attempt, but there was always a hope. My CFA result was still not out, so I was just like any other ordinary MBA fresher from an ordinary B-School. It took me 3 hours a hectic journey to reach the venue. Office seemed okay, though I couldn't get a peek inside the main premises. Everything seemed awesome compared to Rewa office.

1st round was essay writing. The topic was - "The institutions like World Bank and IMF are giving monetary aids to poor nations. Give two advantages and two disadvantages of the same". Seemed okay. There were about 30-35 other candidates, and I think majority were cleared for the 2nd round. 2nd was very tough aptitude test. It was computer based 48 questions in 48 minutes divided into 4 parts - English (very very very tough), Maths, Reasoning and Finance. Apart from English, I did good in every other. They asked me to wait, to others they asked them to leave. I thought I cleared it. But 3 hours later they said that my profile hasn't been selected.

I couldn't write my feelings here. I was so shocked. I had always thought I had made it. Getting rejected was a big surprise. I didn't feel like coming back to home. Rewa again floated infront of my eyes. I didn't want to go back. I took a bus from Gurgaon. That day heavy downpour happened. It again took me 3 hours to reach back.

Corporate Executive Board, Gurgaon

Gaurangi gave me a lead - a walk-in for Data Analyst job with Corporate Executive Board, Gurgaon. I went for it the next day. The office was fantastic. The best I had ever seen. I had made no preparations for this interview as I could not get time to even go through the requirements of that position. I didn't know what profile were they offering, or what exactly were they looking for. I was blank in the interview. It was such a pathetic interview. They rejected me on the spot.

Wednesday, 14th July, Lucknow

I had my train for Lucknow the same day - 13th July. On Wednesday morning - 9 am, I reached home. Parents and sister were not happy that I have come back to home after quitting from the job and everyone insisted me to go back again. Finally I shouted at my sister to leave me alone and stormed out of the room. Now my cell always is on vibration mode. Luckily when I came out of the room, my cell was ringing. Some Noida number. I picked up the phone and heard something that I had an interview the next day at Noida. I coudn't get the company name properly, but it was for Data Analyst profile. I rejected it and asked if it could be arranged on Monday. But she was apprehensive. Anyhow, that story seemed to be over. I had my Rewa reservation for Thursday.

Half an hour later, Rahul bhaiyya (my roomie at Rewa) called me up and asked why I rejected the interview call. I said that I am back to Lucknow. He told me that he gave me reference in The Smart Cube for the Data Analyst. They are hiring and they had a recruitment process the next day, and asked me to rush up. I booked a volvo ticket and went to Noida the same day. Stayed at home just for 8 - 9 hours. My shortest trip to home.

Next will be continued...

Jaypee Cements - the positive approach

2010-07-23T00:31:00.002+05:30

Many of us are fed-up with the work and the company Jaypee Cements. Everyone wants to leave the company and join somewhere else. There is complete negativity about it in the surroundings. But amidst all these, consider this:

Why are so many of us here? If you wanted to complain, why did you join this place? Agreed, none of us knew that it would be like this. All of us complain that there is politics here, work environment too bad, no growth scope, no great atmosphere or living conditions, etc etc etc

Let me take you all to the months of October and hence. All of us were cribbing about when Jaypee will come to recruit. After a lot of drama, it finally came on 24th Feb, 2010. Everyone of us was excited to be placed with them. Half of those who could not, cried in tears, and remaining cried without tears - but remorse was obviously there for every unplaced person.

We complain about Jaypee for all the various reasons like... there is no growth scope here. I say, how do you know this? Have you seen the future? If you say that you can realize this, consider that Jaypee is one of the fastest growing companies in India and who knows that tomorrow they will have so much of work for you that you wouldn't have time to rest - and learning and growth will be all over the place.

You complain that living conditions are bad. Consider those thousands of them who are living there since years. Are they not human? Are they not surviving? Just because we have always had those luxuries - thanx to our parents - that we can afford to complain. Consider the hardships your parents, grandparents went through in their initial phase of life that we are privileged to lead a luxurious life. If Jaypee college has provided you comfort, it is because you have paid them. And now they are paying you. There is a lot of difference.

You complain that the company works like a Government organization. I say, why don't you take the initiative and suggest your immediate boss about the changes you wish to bring. Work for this aggressively, and who knows one day it will start getting implemented. Remember, THE POWER OF ONE MAN rule.

And why do you forget one major point? This company is purely Indian - with Indian values and culture. You make fun when asked to salute EVERYONE with Shri and Ji with their names. This is real Indian culture. Learn to imbibe it. An Indian has done so much of hard work that we can proudly say that India has such a company.

Many complain of the fraud this company does. I say, which company is 100% honest? Just because you now know this company from within, you can speak about this. How can you say others are not?

You complain because you are selfish. Just think, you are associated with a company which has been into so much of social work. So many schools, so many job offers, etc. You say there is politics within the company. I don't think that is a reason to run away. Politics is everywhere in India, especially if it is an Indian company.

You say, the place is not good. I don't know about other places but just have a look at my album on Facebook, titled - Rewa. It is an awesome place. For the other places, I can say that give it time, it is in its inception phase, it will grow to be a better place for sure.

Some say, there is no work in Jaypee. Then, FIND work. This isn't possible there will be NO work. And if presently this is the situation, you will surely find a lot of work in near future. Till then, utilize this time in doing something constructive. No one would be giving you so much of money just for nothing.

One best thing about this organization - you will never be fired. Even during the recession period, when every other company fired many employees, Jaypee kept on hiring. Along with Infosys, it was one of the only companies to do this. And you abuse such a company?

There are various reasons why one should stick with this company. There are lot of positives here, you just need to realize. Stop cribbing about every other thing and try to love the work you are doing. You will enjoy, no doubt.

The switch

2010-07-23T00:23:00.002+05:30

Well well well... this would be one of the best posts. The reason? So many events happened in this one month, the time I didn't blog at all.

These blogs, social networking sites, etc. do tend to reveal many of your personal life aspects, and sometimes you just don't want anyone to know what is going on in your mind. Hence, I decided to keep away from this place. And also because, I was so disturbed during all these days that even though I wanted to, I didn't feel like writing something.

Anyways, I have resigned from Jaypee Cements. Would be joining The Smart Cube from Monday. This is what I can say. Monday, 26th July, will be a historical day for me. My CFA Level 1 result is also due that day. And since I have found a job for myself, I won't be under any pressure for the result. If I pass, very good - and I will be applying for the Level 2 next year. But if I don't, obviously I will feel very bad/sad, but I will have nothing to lose.

The greatest thing is that I am back to Noida, back to my favorite place - NCR. Job is great. Paying off well. Analyst position. Timings great. Environment super awesome, etc etc.

1st day at work

2010-06-24T21:43:00.002+05:30

yesterday's post was a hurried one, so left many points which i wanted to write. yesterday was my last day at TTG. These 7 days were great, as there was no burden of work at all. i just wished these didn't pass. i went to rewa city in the eve yesterday with navankur and all. they all went back today and it again seems so dull here.

today was my first 'working' day at office. made some POs and Excise Amendments. work is boring. i cant do this for too long. pathetic. met Mr. C.S. Jain again. thought to write many things. but mind is not working right now. later then...

turn around of decisions

2010-06-23T16:39:00.000+05:30

A quick one this... lack of time prohibiting me to do things i really wish to. forgive for the punctuation, spelling mistakes and grammar.

last few days have been really eventful, bring some turnarounds in my life. i had surely planned to run away from this place on 30th june. every other minute i was busy analyzing how can i maximize my number of days in service, take maximum salary from the company and without giving a resignation. i just didn't want to continue here. survival seemed tough. tough conditions here. very tough.

papa has always wanted me to continue here. he gave examples of my cousins who are sitting jobless since months, coz they took decision of leaving the present job in haste. he asked me not to leave until i find an alternative. my argument was how could i find an alternative sitting here in rewa.

internally, i knew my points are just emotional, coming from my heart. brain knew that what loads of people are advising is true. Mr. Pankaj Vajpayee played a major role. he asked me not to leave this place. he told me various things and then only i began pondering on the aspect of staying here. mr. dhamija, Sr. VP, Marketing, took a lecture yesterday and motivated me to the brink to stay here. and finally, sumit bhaiyya put forward some point in his own style. he said, "marwani to pakka padegi. rewa me reh ke marwane ke paise to milenge atleast. delhi aake to free me marwaoge"

the point had weight. i wouldn't know for how long i would have to stay to find a good job. leave a job of Rs 35k and joining something paying around Rs 15k isn't worth risking. and that too, with total uncertainty. voila, ankit bhaiyya, everyone advised me to stay on for some more period.

thus, i finally decided. i would stay here till march next year. i would continue trying something staying here - which ofcourse difficult, isn't impossible. if i clear cfa level 1, i would take a leave in april next year and prepare for level 2. if i fail to clear cfa level 1, there is actuaries. plan is clear, i just need a BIKE ASAP. rest later, feeling sleepy.

TTG

2010-06-18T21:48:00.000+05:30

It has been now three days into the orientation program here, and truly speaking, I am enjoying these days. The reason being, I am not sitting in that boring office of mine for 12 hours. Instead, we go to TTG (Technical Training Group), which is about 5 kms from the plant, at 8:30 am and come back by 1:30 pm. Two lectures are scheduled everyday in TTG. It seems we are into the college again. And like always, I pay no heed to the lecturer.

Once we are back, we head for the lunch and by 2:30 pm, we are directed to move into the plant and look out for various departments, their functioning, etc. And the last three days have completely changed my perspective for the company. The first day we went to the Quality Control Department. High Quality machineries and equipments were installed. It really seemed like some kind of research is going on. Accurate room temperature settings, proper environment conditions, high-tech computers, machines, etc., gave an impression what kind of highest quality work is going on here. We also went to the Control Room and it is this room from where the most important work takes place. Loads of computer screens, second by second monitoring of the kiln, and various machineries, just looked like a CBI room :P

We also got to see inside the kiln (through a blue screen) which had temperature of around 1400 deg Celcius. They have also put up a model of the Jaypeenagar Factory and is just a masterpiece.

The next afternoon, I saw the Raw Mill, where the raw material (limestone) was grinded. It was a huge machine - around 30 feet in height. 4 grinders were installed. Everywhere around there were amazing machines - I just don't know what each of them is called. Next we went to the Coal Mill, which grinds the coal - the machine was similar to the Raw Mill machine. It was dead black and hot that I felt like running away as soon as possible. The next was the Cement Mill. And here, it became necesary to cover the face too. Lots of cement in the air. It had a machine which takes the grinded limestone, clinker and gypsum in fixed composition and thus, cement is produced after a lot of stages. The cement then is packed in the packer. There is a machine which rotates and has 8 hooks. A person covers the hook with a bag (bora) and 50 kg cement automatically fills in it and is packed - sealed. Then that bag travels down 5 storeys via the conveyor belt and into the truck. Wow it was just amazing to see that. I came back to my room quickly and had a good shower - I was all dirty from top to bottom.

Today in the morning, Nikunj asked me to meet people in my depratment b'coz everyone is thinking I have run away - since I haven't been to my office since two days - though I had informed my boss. Anyways, after coming back from TTG, we went to the Mining and Autoworkshop department today. It was about 1.5 kms from the main gate. And the temperature was around 45 deg C. It was really demanding on the body. 2 hours into the hot, humid and dirty workshops, and I had to proceed to my department. I went there by about 4:30 pm and had to work till 7. But for a change, I enjoyed the work today. My trainer was impressed - thanks to Mathematics - it always comes to my rescue. Hehe.

As of now, every moment I just plan when to leave from here - and the alternatives. No one is happy back home with my decision of leaving this job. No one seems to understand the reality here. I am just wasting time for the sake of some money. Anyways, pitashree ka hukm.

I was checking out some job portals. Lots of jobs there, and bloody every job needs experience. When everyone needs experience, where would the freshers get so? The biggest mistake of my life - doing MBA from JBS - seems to haunt me forever. :(

The tough life

2010-06-14T22:52:00.001+05:30

Today was the first time, I worked till 8 pm. Strange things happened today. I reached at 8 am sharp, spent around 3.5 hrs watching the work Mr. Anil Mishra was doing in order to learn and understand it, but felt very sleepy. I came back to the room by 12, and slept till 2:30. I went back after lunch and got a big shock. In my department, there are a total of 4 people + the boss. Out of those 4, one was on leave who came back after lunch. But... But.. the other 2 took leave from today. Means, the department remains with the boss, the person who returned from the leave today afternoon and ME.

It had been just 6 hours I had been here, I was expected to do such a lot of work - and I had no idea how to do it. People take a month to understand and I wasn't even given a full day. Later, I was told to copy down some stuff from papers to a register to maintain a record. The other tasks the department does is creating bills, purchase orders, vehicle permits, etc., all of which is sheer paper work, some superior data entry and nothing else. The disgusting thing is that my colleagues who are 3-4 year old here are doing the same thing. Which means, I have no better scope here in the coming future too, and would be doing the same job for a lot of time to come.

I thought today, was it for this I did B.Tech., MBA and CFA? Agreed they are paying good, but then the work is pathetic, 8 to 8 job, Monday to Saturday... where is the life here? I think I will ruin my career and my life if I continue here for long. As of now, CFA is the only ummeed.

Had a little argument at home. I don't know what to do. Surviving here is becoming difficult.

The much awaited Sunday

2010-06-13T14:43:00.000+05:30

SUNDAY...

You get to know the true value of Sunday during your job only. Though Sunday, as a holiday, is enjoyed during school time and college time too, but those days were different altogether. After 8 to 8 job from Monday to Saturday, Sunday seems much-awaited.

Well, continuing from the last post, I was given the Purchase Department. I worked hard for 2 days, trying my best to understand and learn the work there. I was just starting to enjoy me work, when I was summoned by Mr. Duggal, GM and was told that my job is being changed and from then, I would be shifted to the Purchase of Steel for the plant. My reporting officer changed, my office changed. My new place has no cooler even.

This happened yesterday afternoon only, and whatever I could get to learn in 4-5 hours, I found this job is much easier than what I had to do in the previous one. But this one is more hectic, more paper work involved and less number of staff. Amidst all this, about 100 times a day I think about the CFA result. I just hope to clear it, otherwise I will be ruined.

My room is still the same - the guesthouse (field hostel). And again I emphasize, I can be thrown out anytime from here. Just counting my days. Yuvraj has gone back, right now to Noida. These people have been given the JBS building's 5th floor to live in, which is nothing less than a 5 star hotel. Unfair... But then, considering they are posted in Daala, one can say for them is 'char din ki chandni, fir andheri raat'.

So, I woke up at 1 pm today, didn't have breakfast and lunch. And I would again be going to Rewa city today evening - my 3rd trip in 6 days. Oh! I love that place. Oasis in Desert. Haha.

Rest all is fine. Will upload some pics soon, on blog, on facebook and on orkut. Till then, take care

Job, Rewa and Jainism :)

2010-06-10T20:59:00.001+05:30

3 days down. This is equivalent to having earned Rs. 3000. Hahaha.. sounding kiddish na?

Anyways, as I had promised to give you updates about myself, I landed here in Rewa on 7th June after having given CFA Level 1 on 6th June in Greater Noida. CFA was good, and I predict a 60-40 chance of passing. You never know what can the cutoff be. Afternoon session was slightly tougher than the morning one and with all the tiredness and lethargic mood, I ruined my afternoon paper.

Took a train directly from New Delhi to Rewa on 6th night itself. Reached there at around 4:30 PM on 7th (2 hrs late). And from here begins the interesting story.

I met Ashish, Kanav and Puneet on the station itself. They had to board Rewa express to go to Allahbad. Spent time with them and got to know something about the city and the company. They warned and advised me on a few points - some which I followed and some did not. And for not following, I am suffering.

I felt terrible on 7th. T-E-R-R-I-B-L-E I mean to say. Just felt like running away, back to Lucknow. 10s of thoughts occupied my mind. I was searching for the alternatives. What if I run away? Where would I work? What if I failed in CFA? What would be my future? What could I be earning?

On the other hand, there were also thoughts like, How can I stay in this place? How can I eat the food here? The rooms, the bathroom.. How will I survive with nothing luxurious, even comfortable, here? Mohit gave me a great support and tried his best to encourage me.

Somehow, I passed 7th June and came 8th - the first day of my joining. I woke up early at 7am. Shaving became too difficult with poor light, poor mirror and poorer water supply. After enquiring about where I need to go, I went there and reported to the concerned person - Mr. Amit of P&A Dept (P&A is equivalent to HR). He asked me to sit and assured I will be called. From 8 am to 10:30 am, I just kept on sitting in the waiting room with an idiot fan throwing hot air. At 10:30, Mr. Amit was just passing through the waiting room, saw me and said, "Oh I am sorry, I just forgot u were waiting here". I thought WTF.

He gave me some forms to fill - PF, Nominees, etc. etc. I filled them in half an hour. At 11:30 I was asked to come back at 3 pm for documents verification. And I was sharp at 2:55. But alas! He was nowhere to be seen till 5pm. At 5, I got my documents verified and was asked to report at 8:00 am the next day.

With Mohit, I went to Rewa city. To my utter surprise, I found the city way way way better than I had expected. One can find stuff of comfort, if not luxury, easily. I felt better that evening, thinking to shift to Rewa City and live there. Papa agreed, and I was planning to shift with a month or two.

The next day, I expected I would be givin some work. But the same old story. I reached at 8, waiting till 10:15. This time I myself went to Mr. Amit so that he did not forget me. He said that there was no work for me and my orientation would begin from 16th. He asked me to come back again at 3. I came back to the room and watched a movie. What else can I do in this city of aloofness. I went back on time and waited for an hour again. After which he asked to me come the next day - i.e. today.

Yuvraj came to Rewa yesterday for three days, so atleast these three days would be great.
Today, I reported again sharp at 8. But today, at 9, Mr. Amit asked someone to accompany me to Mr. C.S. Jain. He is HOD of many departments here. I heard he is country-wide popular within the cement fraternity. People don't get a chance to meet him easily. Nikunj and Prashant told that they also didn't get a chance to meet him. I waited for one hour in some stupid person's cabin, and then was accompanied by Mr. Sanjeev Jain, PS to Mr. C.S. Jain. And this moment changed my fate. I talked to Mr. Sanjeev for half an hour. He is so helpful. Then, he did his best to take me to Mr. C.S. Jain. I went in. He shook hands with me and asked for my details. Then, he called Mr. Sahilendra Mohan, Sr. V.P (purchase dept) and told him that he's sending a "very good" boy and to take care of him personally. HAHAHAHA. I was on the top of the world. I tried to take out some more relations with him through papa. Jain-Jain effect. He was too happy to know about my details.

When we came out, Mr. Sanjeev Jain told me that C.S. Jain favours Jains a lot. Wow!!! Thank you bhagwan ji. You always support me. Then, I met Mr. Mohan, then Mr. Bhardwaj (GM - Raw Materials) and Mr. Duggal (GM - Store and Purchase). All gave me a warm reception. Hearing about MBA and B.tech, everyone commended me. Mr. Duggal assigned me to Mr. Rakesh Singh to train me about all the process. And then, after lunch, I was only working working and working.

The day was good today, except getting the news that my job is 8 to 8. :(

Yuvraj and I are planning to go to Rewa City tomorrow. Reliance idiots blocked my SIM. Have to give them a local ID Proof. Anywayss... rest later.. as things happen.. as of now, Happy days are here :)

The ambitions...

2010-05-23T17:36:00.001+05:30

Here is the list of what I intend to do in my future. Although this is not something to reveal in public, but I choose to do so. Don't know why. I will keep track of this place in order to maintain it as a check list.

1. First entire salary to maa papa.

2. No separate account, would deposit all my salary in the same account - which is the joint one of me and papa. This would not give me a chance to claim any money as entirely mine. All money which I'll earn will be of papa first, then mummy and then me. Most of it will be used to pay back the debts.

3. But about 20% of my monthly salary I intend to make it a part of my savings.

4. I have to get married to her - in any case - by any chance. Will keep money aside for the marriage, it has to be a big one.

5. Will also keep money aside for Anjali's and Vartika's marriage.

6. Adopt a son. Pay for his studies, his living, etc. even though he may or may not live with me.

7. Never do anything in life for name and fame. I don't want my name in any charity I will do in life. And charity I will definitely do a lot and let no one get to know about that.

8. First small budget car after one year completion of my job. A bike after 2 month completion. A luxury cell phone after 6 months - most probably BlackBerry.

9. Shift to NCR after 2 years in Rewa (if not posted somewhere else).

10. Will also try to switch to a financial analyst job if cleared CFA level 1 and 2.

Will keep updating this place.

The tale of 27

2010-05-23T17:22:00.001+05:30

Well I am just two weeks away from the CFA exam. From the status point of view, I will complete the 1st revision of all the 6 books by tomorrow. Seems as if I am well prepared for the paper, but it isn't so. For much fury and frustration of my mind, I am not being able to remember a thing. During the revision, more than half the topics I felt I was reading for the first time. The mind has been saturated of retaining anything now. One can not expect from it to retain so many things in just 2 months, and that too after so many family problems.

Tauji expired on 15th May. It was really a big shocker. Sometimes, I just feel he is here, saying something in his jolly manner. He was always in jovial mood. But the death was inevitable after that brain hemorrhage. Really does one survive. Well, the incident took time but I am back in control. But now it seems I have run out of time.

Was talking to Nikunj, Manjeet and Seemant the other day. They said Rewa is a tough place to live. Simmy said that people sleep on the roof there coz of such heat and humidity in the rooms. This can be a sign of sadness and a gloomy future but I am coping with these kinds of news by just keeping those Rs 35000 per month in my mind.

Several thoughts and planning have started to flood my mind as to what I would do with the money and about my future. In the next blog, I will jot down some of my plans and will keep them updating whenever necessary.

So, now the topic of the blog - The Tale of 27.

I had kept this message as Gtalk status a few weeks ago. I had thought to write about it then but didn't get time. Anyways, actually the 27th day of the last three months has been special to me. 27th February was the day I got selected for Jaypee. 27th March was the last day of my college life. 27th April was the induction day, where I was given the joining date and joining letter.

Moving ahead with the same day, 27th May has to be something special. I know 26th has got to be because I'm going out with Rashi. I hope 27th also brings something remarkable for me to carry on the streak.

Kissa Calculator ka

2010-05-13T02:18:00.003+05:30

Much water has flowed through the Ganges, since I visited this place the last time (this phrase reminds me of class 10th when Victor used this and I laughed at him, then he told that this is absolutely correct and a catchy phrase used in English - taught by famous tutor McFarland).

Anyways, returning back to the Ganges thing, this CFA has really taken a toll on my mind. 6th June is the exam and I have finally received the admit card. The center is so distant - in Greater Noida. No conveyance, and I have to reach there by 8 am. Huh!! Probably will hire a cab for the entire day, as I will be getting free not before 5 pm. 6 hrs paper.. really lengthy and energy consuming.

Studies are going fine. I have managed to complete all the 6 volumes on 12th May and now started revising. And during this revision, I am shocked to notice that there are many concepts I have forgotten in such a way that I don't even remember if I had read it before in my life. And if you are thinking that it is the weakness of my mind, then let me correct you. I have worked hard a lot, and when you are covering more than 2000 pages in less than 5 weeks, with major tremors in between, such things happen.

About the tremor thing, Tauji suffered from a brain haemorrhage on 22nd April, and now in coma since then. I had been to Delhi and then to Gwalior for 4 days and 5 days respectively and thus the studies took a setback. But Tauji is far more important than this CFA, I had to compromise with the exam.

In the midst of the events, I was going through the CFA website the other day, when I noticed they had mentioned only 2 particular calculators to be allowed during the exam. I was shocked and relieved too that I saw the information in time. After a lot of hullabaloo, Sonu bhaiyya got it for me from Jain Book Academy in Connought Place in New Delhi for Rs. 3400 (Texas Instrument BA 2 Plus Professional). I got it yesterday and since then, trying to learn how to use it.

Yesterday night, when exhausted from studies, I lost into some deep thoughts staring at my calculator. I went back deep into my memory lane and remembered how eager I used to be and wait for my Nanaji to return from his office when I was at his place in vacations. The moment he came back home, I used to unzip his bag and search for his calculator. It was a standard calculator with only the standard functionalities. I would be 5 or 6 by then. The love for calculator and pressing keys inputting weird numbers to get weird solutions had been my habit and hobby since my early childhood. That has transformed into love for numbers at a bigger age. So, I pondered how small incidences and habits can lead to some career defining skills.

A child's talent and his skills can be gauged right from his birth if kept a tight watch. My Nanaji seldom denied giving his calculator because of the fear I will ruin it. I am not complaining but these kind of thoughts give me some fair idea about how I will bring up my child. Sometimes the excitement builds on :P

By the way, Papa came back today after 20 days journey. He was with Tauji since the very first day. He said that this was the longest time he was away from Lucknow since he came here in 1980. Huh!! Great. With his arrival, I think I will be unburdened from my duties now. Really tough to play the "head's" role, though mummy did most of the jobs. But that Activa thing...

Ok, now I shall get back to studies...

Sachin - Times Magazine Quote

2010-04-23T21:36:00.001+05:30

Can there be better lines than these ever?

" When Sachin Tendulkar travelled to Pakistan to face one of the finest bowling attacks ever assembled in cricket, Michael Schumacher was yet to race a F1 car, Lance Armstrong had never been to the Tour de France, Diego Maradona was still the captain of a world champion Argentina team, Pete Sampras had never won a Grand Slam.When Tendulkar embarked on a glorious career taming Imran and company, Roger Federer was a name unheard of; Lionel Messi was in his nappies, Usain Bolt was an unknown kid in the Jamaican backwaters. The Berlin Wall was still intact, USSR was one big, big country, Dr Manmohan Singh was yet to "open" the Nehruvian economy. It seems while Time was having his toll on every individual on the face of this planet, he excused one man. Time stands frozen in front of Sachin Tendulkar. We have had champions, we have had legends, but we have never had another Sachin Tendulkar and we never will."

-- Times Magazine

Weird schedule!!

2010-04-12T23:03:00.000+05:30

This CFA really demands a lot. Yesterday, I was going through some of the blogs and articles of CFAs where they had discussed how tough it was to crack the exam. I laid hands on some of the postcards which came along with the study material, which I had somehow missed till now. All the various guidelines and postcards pointed towards the same direction - this is the toughest exam I am ever going to appear.

And then, there was this big shock which has put me into dilemma. As in my last post, I had said that I will be giving December's exam now, where they charge about Rs. 30000 instead of full Rs. 55000, I was in the minds that if I somehow clear June's exam then well and good, otherwise I will give a re-attempt in December. Hardly did I know about some of the big bad rules. And those are.. I will have to withdraw from June's exam till 28th May, in order to reappear in the December's exam. And I will be getting no refunds for that. And those Rs 30000 will still be charged.

Now the dilemma is whether I should withdraw and spend Rs. 30000 more (again taking a chance in December as I know I won't be studying again when on job) or to take a chance and give June's exam, because anyhow, I have a job. It is really a tough decision to make. As of now, I have decided to see my preparation status till last week of May and then make a decision about it. For that, I have to work 10 times harder now. And I know that. And I have cancelled my trip to college too. :(

I have changed my schedule completely. This may seem weird to many, but for those who have lived in hostels, it is just another combination of awkward schedule.

I sleep at 7 am. Get up at 12 noon and have breakfast. Again sleep for 2 more hours (cannot compromise with 7 hours of sleep :P). After waking up at 2 pm, next one hour goes in sundry jobs (even I can't figure out how that 1 hour passes). Have lunch at 3 pm, then a little bit of study, watch TV, internet, all combined. 5 pm is the bathing time (taps dry from 12 to 5 pm). Again some internet and studying. Go to temple at 7pm and then have dinner at around 8. Watch a little bit of IPL till 9pm. And then from 9 pm till 6 am in the morning is my CFA time, with some gTalking in between for some time (and I have to stop this now). At 6 am, I read newspaper, mummy gives something to eat (although I keep on searching for something or the other to eat for the whole night :P). And then 7 am sleeping time.

Wow, what a weird one this is!! And this is because the night time is the best to concentrate, atleast for me. I had taken a 30 min break for Finance, now getting back. Bye bye!!

CFA - its now IMPOSSIBLE

2010-04-09T23:44:00.000+05:30

C.F.A = Care Free Attitude...

Although CFA stands for Chartered Financial Analyst, my dear friend Arunesh expanded it as above, by looking at my attitude towards the exam during our MBA days. Ofcourse, when we were into our last few days of MBA, I didn't want to miss the opportunity to enjoy and make the last days memorable than to study for the exam.

I hoped I would finish the course well in time. My exam is on June 5th this year, means hardly about 2 months away. There are a total of 6 THICK books covering the core aspect of Finance and related material. I had taken first 2 books with me to Noida and managed to finish only one. When I came to Lucknow, I started with the next book right from the next day. Economics it was. Though the course was hardly difficult for those who had studied Economics seriously in their MBA, but as many of you would know, how DDMs had done this course. So that brought me to square zero - means no knowledge about what economics was. It was a mountain to climb, but I didn't give up, rather decided to take 10 days to complete the whole book.

Tomorrow is the 10th day, and I am well set for completing it tomorrow. But yesterday changed my attitude completely. I opened the box in which other books were kept (the next 4). I had the first and the last glance on them in January first week, when they had arrived and since then, they are kept there waiting for their chance to come. And I gave up.

Sorry Adidas, Sorry Sachin. I know you say IMPOSSIBLE IS NOTHING. And all through my life, since I had heard you Sachin endorsing this, I believed in it. But I am sorry to say, this time, completing the course in time is IMPOSSIBLE for me. What people study in 7-8 months, I was just thinking to complete it in 2 months - and that too after the haphazard way I did my MBA. Even if I glance through all books once, I will have to redo them the second time. Because I don't even remember what I had studied yesterday, how will I retain all the 6 books on the exam day. Huh!!

Now I plan to skip this June paper and reappear for December one.

A week after college

2010-04-06T18:34:00.000+05:30

It has been a week since I left the college forever. These last seven days have made me realize what I could never felt when my B.Tech. friends left last year. The pain, agony and emotions of leaving a home can only be realized when you yourself feel it.

30th March 2010 when I crossed that gate #3 for the last time with 7 luggages, I somewhere at the back of my mind knew that life is going to be dull and painful over the next few weeks. And I was right. Not many who are still in the college would believe this, but I really have dreams (or say nightmares) of the college. I see those red bricks, between which I am entangled, beckoning me again. I see the faces of my very own friends, who somewhere or the other, are trying to find me. Rather it has always been the other way round. It is me who was always looking out for them. Seeing the smiling faces of my friends soothed and calmed my mind. It gave me a feeling that I am never alone, these people are always there to stand by my side.

But then I open my eyes, and see myself entrapped in the four walls here at my home. It is not that I feel jailed here. Home in any case is where I belong. But not finding those lovely faces, the presence of those mystic souls leave me shattered. I "crave" to be back there. I just pray to God to give those moments once again in my life. Just revert the clocks back. Only 6 months.

I have my CFA exam in June first week. It is a vast amount of course and I had spent Rs. 55000 for it. Yet I don't feel like picking up the books. I am not able to bring my mind to Lucknow from Noida. All the moments dance infront of my eyes of the last 5 years, especially those last 5 months. I clearly remember 25th July 2005, when I wore a brown t-shirt and a black trouser on my first day at college, when at the first floor near the staircases, a second year senior mam warned me to be in formals from the next day or else... (she did not tell what "else")

I remember how I escaped ragging two times, once disguised as a 2nd year guy and at the other, giving no ears to the senior who kept on calling me from behind. I remember those risks I took which later on I rued I should not have taken, as I missed on the healthy interaction with them.

I remember those T-1, T-2 and T-3 (called Minors and Majors at that time), how dedicately I used to study in the first semester and how dedicately I used to play Counter Strike in the next one. I remember the third semester when I used to study more "out of course" in Mathematics, than studying Data Structures, which never got into my head. I still dread that asterisk (*) symbol used in programming. I remember that 4th semester, growing in the able support of Sid Sir and Priyank Sir (our 4th year seniors), the Imaginis and the various visits to Priyank Sir's hostel room, which we feared more than visiting the HOD's cabin. And this I can never forget in my life - that signature which ensured I accept to be transferred to DDM program from my B.Tech.

I remember how helpless I used to feel in the 5th and 6th trimester, where there was no Maths course and only Computer courses. I remember that point of time when I realized how mistakingly I opted to do B.Tech instead of B.Stat. I remember it was during those times, I started this blogging which I have continued till date and also remember the end of my 3 year relationship with Shruti. Those were really tough times. And I also remember the main event that coursed this decision - my ever nostalgic Manali trip. "Ye ishq haye jannat dikhaye" from Jab We Met still drives me to those beautiful panoramic mountains and those masti we did there.

The 7th and 8th Semester were so special to me. I remember how Mamu (Varun Mittal) approached me for the final year project, hoping I would lend my Statistics knowledge to the fullest in the project, but ultimately I hardly did anything in that and still received an A+. Because of that, I first time managed to cross a 9 point mark in both semesters. The freeness in those two semesters allowed us the CC time. That 12 to 2 pm time daily I can never forget. I miss you Madhur and Rao.

The last semester uniting with Sakshi after 2 years, and that nightout at Neha's place was wonderful. I still remember how I feared being alone in the 5th year when all my nears and dears would leave me. How I would pass that MBA 2nd year time with no one apart from Yuvraj around me.

I remember how casual and mistaken I was during my Internship time when I chose not to do it. I attended only 10 days in 8 weeks and that was one of the biggest mistake on my part. But somehow I managed to pull off the viva when I returned in late July for my MBA. I still remember how out of place we DDMs initially felt, and then gradual interaction with the full time MBAs. It was really a very nice experience. I remember how separate I became from Yuvraj and Parth, and how I made new and long lasting friends in Mrityunjay, Vikrant, Lalit, Shruti, etc.

I remember the times I spent with Sumant and my friendship with his classmater - my juniors. And then, the day which was the turning point of my life - that trip to corporate offices of Gurgaon. That prompted me to team up with Arunesh and bring a renaissance in the college. I still remember loads of hazards we needed to face to continue with our venture. I can never imagine myself having been involved in all those political gimmicks without a tinge of politics in either me or Arunesh.

And then I still remember how the last 5 months made me so popular which remaning 4.5 years coudn't. How confident now I feel. We may not be so successful in our venture but how can I forget these activities gave me some diamonds in the form of friends - Arunesh and Mayur.

I still remember those days when there was a lot of apprehension about Jaypee's recruitment and then the 25th Feburary - the day of my Jaypee interview and then 27th Feburary - the official announcement of my selection. I still remember transformation of life after that - there was relaxation and satisfaction. And then how can I forget being friends with someone so cute, so special - Kajal. There are some people who unknowingly transform you - and for me, she played a great part. I love you my sis.

I will also never forget those two brithday cakes I cut this year - one from Mrityunjay and the other brought by Tanvi. Thank you both of you. That 16th March, the farewell day. Riki said that this farewell was only because of me. Those words nearly brought tears into my eyes, yet I managed to control. And then finally 30th March, 2010, when I had to leave the place forever.

I crave going back there. I miss that 9 to 10 pm walk. I want to see that "Mela" again. I want to sit in the Lecture Theatres again. I want to lie down on my bed in the hostel again. I miss those bathrooms, those washbasins, that huge mirror. I miss the alternate day filling the bottle from the watercooler. I miss the hostel attendance which I usually missed. I miss those playgrounds. I miss those benches. I miss that Annapurna and Cafeteria. I miss you my friends. You were my love and my life. Wish to see you sometimes in future soon.

Bye Bye College!!!

2010-03-23T13:33:00.002+05:30

And once and for all, it will be the last sunset I will witness in Jaypee.

Amazing!! How time flies!! Sometimes faster than the sand in our fist and at times, like waiting for the rains in the desert. We have seen it all. Five years is a remarkable amount of time - put better - half a decade. In the monsoon of 2005, when we entered the premises for the very first day for our "beyond the school" studies, one could never have imagined that it would be a place we would once never like to leave. Ohh!! I wish I could revert back the clocks.

The diamond era of a student's life, the college has become more as a temple and our home combined. Most of us just became eligible for attaining the driving license when we came here, and now I leave here with mountains of responsibilities burdened on my shoulders.

Just when I will be putting my foot outside of the gate for the last time, I turn around to ponder where would I find such relaxed and enjoyable moments. Those lush green plantations, where moon peeped in from the smallest possible opening between the thick leaves, the milky white effect of halogens giving the natural beauty a tough competition. Those grandiloquent red-brick structures, inside which our souls lived. Those shades of blue, which were worn by us each day, but not forgetting to curse the system, always asking "why the hell this college has uniforms?" Those sleeping in the Lecture Theaters and bunking the Tutorial Classes. That marvellous piece of architectural genius - the Auditorium - where we never found ease writing the exams, adjusting our bums every two minutes. Those school bags of dayscholars against a single register of a hosteller. Those bookworms versus last minute scholars. Those fashionable teachers and those carefree students. Those notice boards and those watercoolers. The efficient usage of cellphones in classes and exams and those highly techno projectors which many teachers could never operate.

The ever-cursed food of Annapurna and those repeated boring menu of Cafeteria. Those 60 minute walk after dinner and those strategically positioned benches along the path. Those crashed crushes and those fevicol-bonded couples. Those 10 pm goodbye of couples versus "chal kal fir try karenge" of singles. Those gtalk and orkut and those GREs and CATs. That Sarojini Bhawan and the Aryabhatta Bhawan. Those 5 am sleeps and those 4 pm waking up. Those Computer Games versus those Research papers. That JYC and those JIVEs. Those paranthe walas and the Shipra Mall. And one thing that has never stopped in Jaypee, the ever-going on construction somewhere or the other.

Every moment is clearly flashing in my mind. I turn back and set my foot out; tears in my eyes, remorse in my heart. Just wanting one more year to spend here. Just wishing someone comes and holds the hand, saying "I will miss you".

Farewell JBS

2010-03-17T02:25:00.006+05:30

Dasvidaniya....

The farewell is also over now. Officially, we leave the college after this. It has been five years here. I am, for the first time, feeling short of words. Today was an awesome day. Today, some of the guys really made me proud and filled my eyes with tears. I can't owe you more guys. I know this post is going to be a little boring, but I am feeling very nostalgic, so can't help it.

Let me begin. I knew there was going to be something special as far as I was concerned. Afterall, me and Arunesh were only two of them who were with these guys through thick and thin. I knew they will focus on me at some point of time. I bought a new kurta for the occasion. And let me be frank with you guys, for the first time I bought any cloth without my parents, sister or my ex-gf. Vikrant accompanied me. Kurta is really awesome. I received so many compliments today. Wowwww... bas ek ladki ke propose karne ki der thi. :P :P :P

Only four of us were in kurta, rest everyone wore a suit. Yuvraj, Vikrant and Sunny accompanied me. It was looking we had come for our marriage today. :P

I gave a speech addressing 300 odd people, and messed it up. Some words didn't mean what I wanted to say, but meant otherwise, which ruined everything. I was also harsh at few points. I won a chocolate in a game.. rapidly saying.. A1B2C3...Z26. I also got a gift for being the most interactive senior. Woww.. I love that. Thanx guys for considering me for this. And yes, the memento is awesome.

I would definitely be missing my fellow batchmates. But I feel no shame or concern if I truly say, I will miss my juniors more. I never imagined full time MBAs can be so great guys.

Mayur - I feel loneliness surrounding me when I consider my world outside this college without you around. You were my favorite pal and more than that, a brother.

Riki - You are the cutest girl of JBS. The best friend I can wish for. Don't want to leave this place where I won't be finding you around.

Aditya - You were as close to me as Mayur, yet there are some things which are hidden in your heart, and I can feel that remorse. You are an amazing person and today, you melt my heart. Your expressions said it all. I'll miss you.

Sakshi - Initially, you ignored me when we were strangers. Your idiot hubby never introduced me to you. But now, when I started knowing you, you are such a cute and a sweet girl. Everything about you is so genuine, so remarkable. Talking to you is such a relaxation. Thanks for inviting me on your bday, and NOT GIVING ME TREAT. Bad bad girl!! :P Don't forget me ever. Meri kuch hi to itni pyari pyari friends hain. And yes, wese to you are my bhabhi, but more than that a lovely lovely friend. :)

Smriti - I find you the quiet one, introvert kind of. Yet, there is an aura around you, the hard work of yours, the honesty and the genuineness, which I liked most in you. Always be happy.

Akansha - Sometimes you are so irritating, but I would for sure, miss those irritations caused by you. I will surely miss you, one of the most. You are the one with whom I interacted maximum, right?

Shishir and Himanshu - The journey with the juniors began with you guys. You don't require compliments. You guys have a great future ahead. Just always give in your best.

Apart from these, thanx a lot Ribhu, Anumeet, Mayank, Vishakh and all the others who made this farewell a day to remember for long. Thanks Mayur and Riki for the memento too. :)

Ribhu, I didn't get a chance to speak to you much, you came in the scene too late, but man.. you are tooooo good.

My special thanks to Deepika and Prabhjot. It was fun talking to you. :) And to all the 1st year guys, it is not possible to remember each and every name here. But you all 197 deserve a special place in my heart.

And now finally, Sumant. It has been 18 years I have known you. But the time I spent with you in the last one year was more than 100 times of the remaining 17 years. It is because of you that I started with knowing the juniors. Remember, how eager I was to talk to your friends (ofcourse girls) [:P] Those guitar classes, those night-outs at your flats, those trips to GIP etc, I will remember them all... You have been the most special to me. I am proud to say you are my childhood friend. :)

Thnx a lot guys!!! PROUD OF YOU... LOVE ALWAYS!!!

My 23rd Birthday

2010-03-16T22:15:00.003+05:30

Well... one more year passed like sand in the fist. My 23rd birthday was a total contrast to the last one.

http://rollickingmaniac.blogspot.com/2009/03/my-22nd-birthday.html

I cut two cakes this year. And infact these were the only 2 of the complete 5 years at the college. For the first one, in the hostel with hostel friends, thanks to Mrityunjay, Nikunj, Vipul, Gaurav and Navankur. You guys really made my last birthday at college memorable.

Phone calls and messages kept me waiting till 3 am in the morning. I woke up early at 8 am by the numerous calls. In the afternoon, Tanvi and Puneet brought another cake, and it really came as a surprise to me. I am really very lucky to have Tanvi as my friend.

Later, we (Mrityunjay, Nikunj, Vipul and I) went to Lemon Twist. And I don't think I should write anything further. :P

Overall, it was a very memorable and awesome birthday I ever had. Thank you guys for making it special. I remember this throughout my life.

Pursuit of Happyness

2010-03-10T21:36:00.002+05:30

Wow... that was just awesome!!!

Today was my last class of my student life... I thought I would relax today and watch a movie. The mind was blank, I was too happy. Out of 80 odd movies I was having on my hard drive, I chose to watch Pursuit of Happyness. That was just a random thought, even as I had heard the movie is fantastic, though I had no idea of the storyline.

But after the two hours into this movie, I am just like... wowwwwww.... Hats off to the hard work!!! I couldn't keep my eyes dry. It showed how a sheer sheer sheer hard work can lead one to a huge huge success.

I am still into the movie, and not finding words to write here... the feeling is just awesome!! Movies like these give you a lesson to succeed. Don't follow short cuts. Believe in hard work. Complete hard work... Uffff!!! I have to be like that... I have to work very very hard!! I want to keep my family happy!! I WANT TO BECOME LIKE MY FATHER... with my eyes still wet... signing off~~~

P.L.A.C.E.D.

2010-02-28T00:27:00.005+05:30

This is going to be the happiest moment (obviously after Sachin's 200* incident). I GOT PLACED. Jaypee finally came, created panic amongst us for 2 days and nearly drove us crazy on the 3rd day when it delayed its result by about 9 hours. But all is well that ends well, isn't it?

My interview was scheduled to be on the first day, i.e. 25th Feb 2010. My initial being with the 22nd letter of English, I got the interview chance very late in the day, around 5 pm. Pre-interview session, some students sent a wave of tremor when they told that the panel members are very strict and they will really make it hard for us.

Due to very small number of seats available in Finance as well as Operations, I opted for operations since the competition was less there. I studied operations (which I hadn't done in the last 2 years of MBA) in 2 days. And I was given a real big shock when in the morning, I was told that I have to give Finance interview. Anyways, it was good that my Finance concepts were strong enough to tackle the questions. And revision I did when some of the students who had already given the interview told the questions they were asked.

I prayed that they ask me about myself. I had prepared it hard. They weren't asking this question from many. But I was lucky enough. Then too, I forgot about 50% of what I had to speak. Nevertheless, I tried to build on the momentum. They fired me some basic Finance questions, which I would like to list here, for your reference.

Why do you analyze the budget?

What is Debt-equity Ratio?

What are the component of Current Liabilities?

What are the sources of Financing?

What are the components of Debt?

What have you learnt in Portfolio Management?

What is Gross Profit Margin?

After I was done with the answers (which went well - very easy questions), they asked me about my family background. I did a stupidity after this. As I found I was about to be asked to leave, I said, "Sir, I want to tell you something", and I begun with bull-shit that I like Operations more. I don't know why I did this. But anyways, I defended myself saying that I am equally competent in both Finance and Operations.

They asked me if I would be okay for relocation, whether in South India. I had no option but to agree. Then they asked me to give them a brain teaser (I had mentioned in my CV that I won the 1st prize in Brain Teaser even in JIVE) and I also taught them a Vedic Mathematics trick :P

The next 40 hours were nerve-wrecking. What would happen was the biggest concern. My interview had gone well, but everyone was saying the same thing. How would they then reject some of them?

Finally, 27th February was the date when they had to announce the result. Time was 9:30 am. Students assembles at 9 only. Everyone was literally tensed. Gradually, they started postponing things. Finally after a lot of hullabaloo, they delivered the result at 6:30 pm.

VAIBHAV JAIN when called out, I just closed my eyes, and gave a sigh of relief and continued to hear names of my friends. There were claps after each name, though the intensity was proportional to the popularity. Mrityunjay Singh was the only name I missed to hear. My roomie had not been selected. Nor were Kanika, Lalit and Saima. More than I felt happy for myself, I felt sad for them. Tears started to fill my eyes.

All the selected students were summoned to TnP Cell to know their postings and package. I am posted in Rewa, as a Management Trainee in Commercial and Material Management. I think this means Operations. Means I have to part with Finance? That is sooooo bad. I can't leave Finance now. It is running through my veins now. But for now, jo mil gaya wo sahi.

I had other plans for the way to tell this at home, that I will get the printouts of the Offer Letter and courier it, but they are giving the offer letters after 3 weeks, so had to tell them. Everyone is extremely happy. I love you maa, papa and gudia. This is all for you three. I am because of you only.

Tension is gone now. I am feeling relaxed. On this occasion, I would like to thank my friends for being with me. Arunesh, without whom I couldn't think my existence in this college for the last few months. Yuvraj, I have seen lots of ups and downs with you, but you are the best. Madhur, I miss you tooooo much. Pratyush, what can I say about this diamond.. awesome guy. Mrityunjay, I love you :) Vikrant, stop fighting with me on Sachin now, hehe. Lalit and Shruti, you people are the best to be with. Saima, I don't know why I always come back to you and then fight again, you are the cutest girl of JBS. I ensure your placement now. I am always there for you. Rimz, we rather met in an unconventional way, but days have strengthened our friendship. Thnx for everything. Sumant..... no words for you. Thank you for being there.

Apart from them, I would like to thank my loving juniors, Riki, Mayur, Deepika, Aditya, Shishir, Tanmay, Sakshi and Akansha. And now the most special people to me. Rashi, Voila, Victor, Sakshi, Ahinsa, Mukul, Rao, Mallika, Snigdha, Tanvi, Niki di, Dolly di, Shubham, Anshul, Mayank, Sarang, Rahul -- I thank all of you to be there with me.

I am sorry if I have forgotten some names. I am so excited just now that mind is not working :P

I am proud to have soooooooo many friends. :)

Jaypee coming Jaypee coming!!!

2010-02-20T01:55:00.003+05:30

I am into the last 4 weeks of my college life now. March 13th is the official tentative date we are getting over with MBA. The recent days have been quite dramatic. The placement scenario, which as usual remains bad, took a sharp turn. Just before the exams (mid-term), from nowhere these guys rose and chanted in tandem what I was trying to bolt in their mind since months. Suddenly, out of the blue, they thought of making their own TnP. When I was asking for their support in November, no one came forward.

It began with the anonymous postings on the google group. Then, someone gathered guts to post by his name. All the mails were filled by aggression, passion (all hollow) and tension. We should do this.. we should do that.. All kinds of ideas just started hitting their minds when they saw there was no way out now. As they say, idle mind is a devil's workshop, the first foolish idea to pop up in their minds was to meet Mr. Manoj Gaur.. as if it is a child's game.

"I AM IN" were the favourite words of all the 2nd year guys, when asked who would support the initiators. When the meeting was summoned in the "real" world, only 15 odd guys turned up. And they thought to call for a revolt. Lol. Arunesh and me knew that they would be going to land nowhere, as we knew what kind of problems they would be facing. But we were with them. Afterall, we are still a part of the students. [:P]

The dramatic turn took place when we got to know that all the mails reached the faculty too. The next day there was an announcement that Jaypee Associates has confirmed their arrival on 25th and 26th February for recruitment. All the revolts got suppressed. Some genius (me included :P) predicted that it was just a lollipop to suppress the movement on the rise of Convocation on 22nd February and there would be a postponement (read: cancellation) of the company on 23rd or 24th due to some "unknown" reasons.

The allegations were still in seeds and students over-excited for Jaypee, when they announced the next day that the total vacancies this year was 41, just 4 for Finance. The scenario reversed. Now, was the turn to take calls on: Who 4? They booked 2-3 seats for Jaypee wards in advance and for the remaining, which were open, fell into the hands of some 4-5 prospects. Matlab humara to kuch ho hi nahi sakta. Thanks to my parents, I am under no pressure.

In the meanwhile, the revolt has actually got suppressed. Might be that they have completely forgotten that they were really upto something. What I now predict is that when Jaypee really takes only 41, the rest would rise above the ashes and re-revolt. Sach bataye to inka sahi me kuch ho hi nahi sakta...

I am sitting pretty cool. But CFA tension is building up. I am not studying at all and that is really a very bad omen. I am having a cold war like situation with many juniors. What I tried so hard over all these months has back-fired. I had heard somewhere and seen many times in movies, serials that once a person achieves success, he/she forgets all those who helped them when they were nothing, or say, just stepping on their first step. I advised someone to take part in something, she resisted, and when she agreed and became famous, she doesn't remember me. Hahaha.. as if I care.. :P Lessons of life

Getting back to ET and CFA... closing out... cheers!!!

The Resurrection

2010-02-07T02:47:00.003+05:30

Well... my first post of 2010 - coming on 7th Feb. This is the result of losing the touch, being 'extra-busy' and becoming uninterested in these constructive things. It is not that I didn't have anything worth to write. Infact, what all had happened in the past 2-3 months, has never before happened to me. From a special request of my loving readers (read: Saima), I'll pen down the various incidents that have taken place, which deserve to be a part of my autobiography. [:P]

The seeds of leadership which I had sown last November had begun to spring in the last year itself. Arunesh and me had made various presentations and had numerous sessions with the MBA 1st year batch and I had an exclusive session with DDM 4th years too. In order to pick some selected dedicated students who had the fervor to carry on the baton after we depart, we had interviews, motivating sessions, task management, etc. I got a positive response from around 40 juniors and I thank all of them, whatsoever their motive may be. I personally thank Himanshu, Shishir, Mayur and Aditya and wish them luck to carry on this flame further.

My new year started in the train. I was heading towards Lucknow after exams on even the last day of the year. After coming back within three days, we started with our classes on Corporate Taxation and Security Analysis & Portfolio Management, in the loneliness of the campus. Neither the 1st years nor the JIIT students were there. It seemed like a curfew prevailing in the college.

Gradually, days passed. People were back - for a new year, for a new trimester. I was elated to see the crowd back. We resumed the TnP activities with full vigor, but then the misfortune happened. JIIT was to be stripped off its deemed university status. Whatever plans we had made (to make presentations in the corporate industry and spread the good name of JBS) was shattered.

Prateek and his team had made plans to hold a case study competition and I approached Wahi Sir numerous times for this purpose. Idea Cellular had agreed to sponsor the event, but after this incident, they ignored us. There was a lot of hue and cry across the campus. Fire was burnt in the hostels at 2 am. Panic surrounded the college. Amidst this, media looked for an opportunity to have some masala news by interviewing students from those 44 colleges who had been blacklisted. This was the time when we, as students, had to co-operate with the college authority and unite as an entity against the external disturbances. I wrote a blog and our Vice Chancellor read that. I became an overnight 'hero' in the eyes of VC Sir and Medury Sir.

This was the time when I became a popular figure amongst everyone - be it the students, teachers or the management. Where VC Sir and Medury Sir commended me, JBS Director ridiculed me infront of 200 odd students. But I took it sportingly as I knew I have landed in a zone where there was no turning back. Fellow students took this opportunity to make me the puppet and raise their voice through me. I do not have a political mind, so they thought they would make use of me. But I have a brain which can differentiate between good and bad. I chose good, and avoided all the wrong confrontations against the management. I thank Yuvraj to always stand by my side and advise me. Seldom can one have a friend like him.

This incident subdued with the case getting a stay. JIIT focussed on JIVE - X now. Celebrations were all around. Meanwhile, Yuvraj left the hostel and now we are only 7 DDMs left here. I share a room with Mrityunjay now. He is such a nice person, one can easily fall in love with him. But for his ill-luck, mostly those are the guys. :P

The mistake which I had committed couple of months back had hurt me a lot. Breaking ties with Yuvraj and Saima was totally wrong. I am fortunate enough to have them back in my life and thank them to have come back without any complains.

JIVE is fun but I am missing my JIIT friends a lot. A step outside and I get nostalgic about last year's JIVE which is an epic incident in my life. I have made numerous friends in JBS here, whether 1st years or 2nd years, but will never get friends like Madhur, Sakshi, Kushal, Abhiram and Abhishek(s). I had really no idea how I would pass these months here at JBS without them, but Mayur, Shokhi, Akansha, Ridhima, Megha, Mrityunjay, Lalit, Shruti and Ashish did not let my realize this. And how can I forget my better half Arunesh [:P].

The last few months have certainly turned my life upside down. This TnP thing was like a job of an entrepreneur. You have to start everything from the scratch and perform all kinds of job - Operations, HR, Marketing, Finance, etc. But what I learnt is that the most important aspect of your life is People. Selfless service and immense love and care towards humans are the qualities that are most required.

In these months, I also got to know about my strengths and weaknesses and now can flexibly deal with them according to the situation I am in. The most important aspect I learnt is to never take any tension in life. What people these days say - Aal Izz Well, I had been applying this since a long time. I also met various kinds of people and got to know that no two humans are alike. For being successful, you got to deal with different and all kinds of people.

Now with just under 1 more month left in this college, I turn back to see where it all started from. Had I not gone for that visit to Gurgaon's companies with Raunak and Akhil in November, this transformation would never have taken place. As they say, you have to find opportunities in every step and grab them. Who knows what can change your life.

Meeting the 3 stalwarts

2009-12-03T01:49:00.002+05:30

It was quite a dramatic, eventful and a hectic day. Gradually, I feel I am coming out of my shell and doing something which brings me into the limelight - and I am really enjoying it.

After the unfortunate incident with SMC yesterday, every DDM was brewing up to create a 'rang de basanti' today during the meeting of Shri T. R. Kakkar (Director, JIIT). We anticipated that he would be accompanied by the biggies like Dr. Medury or our JBS Director. For about 2-3 hours, we made and remade plans. Aggression and fury was all around. Everyone was determined to give it a shot. Yet, Yuvraj and Arunesh counselled as good friends asking me not to initiate because if something went wrong, there would no one of these to support me.

Anyways, the day began with Lalit, Shruti, Shashank and me going to Dr. Hima Gupta's cabin to find out agenda for today's meeting. She wasn't in her cabin but we luckily found Debdeep De Sir who advised us the way we need to follow and condemned the idea we were adopting. Similarly echoed Nripendra Sir.

In the mean time, Arunesh and I went to the first stalwart in the series - Mr. K. K. Rohatgi, out Training and Placement Cell Head, to show him a presentation on which we are working since a fortnight. Although the meeting is postponed for tomorrow, we had our first task done. Then, Lalit and I went to the Director, Dr. Ravi Shanker - the second stalwart, to get an appointment but the situation demanded us to speak out then and there. It was a mixed response from him. He was positive on some aspects yet negative on many. Somehow, Lalit took permission to visit the third stalwart - the highest in the ladder - Dr. Yaj Medury.

Dr. Medury has been like a monster for all of us here at JIIT Noida and has been an angel for everyone in JUIT Waknaghat. So there is always a conflict about how the man is. It were again Lalit and I who took it to ourselves to visit him - a daunting task. He is the COO of Jaypee, so there is always a risk factor involved of getting thrown out. But we just had one mantra with us.. "We have nothing to lose now".

Quite surprisingly, Sir listened to us calmly and assured that he will have a meeting with the other two stalwarts. The most awesome part was that minutes later, we saw our director moving from JBS building to Medury Sir's cabin. This was the sign of our victory. We have taken the right path. Slowly and gradually all those who had helped us floated infront of my mind. Debdeep Sir, Nripendra Sir, Agarwal Sir, Wadehra Sir, etc.

Although, we still don't know the outcome of the meeting of three stalwarts, I can calmly sleep that I have dont something which needed to be done long ago. I met nearly all the top dignitories today. I am self relieved. No step taken wrong, no rude behaviour, nothing. Later in the day, I got to know that Shruti had made a call to Dr. Chandresh, whose reference had been given by G. K. Agarwal Sir for our placements, gave a positive response for H. & R. Johnson. Arunesh, Lalit and Shruti, you guys are awesome.

In the evening, there was the utmost boring HR class. In the second half, tragedy struck. Nearly 15 of them marked their attendance in the beginning of the class and ran away. When I tried, I was caught. I heard mam screaming "yes pleaaaaase". I did not turn back. Later I got to know that Mam asked everyone my name, yet no one revealed. This was the biggest and happiest moment of the day. At the end, what you want is the trust, love and care from those people for whom you spent the entire day, your complete energy. Unlike Yuvraj said earlier, not to believe anyone, they proved him wrong. Ashish and Anshul (what I came to know) denied they know me. Although my attendance was cancelled, as she took it again, yet I am satisfied.

It has really been a long and eventful day. Tomorrow I have a meeting with Rohatgi Sir, lets see what happens. :)

The 1st Placement Week

2009-11-20T19:03:00.002+05:30

The anticipated week has finally begun. Our 1st Placement Week was never expected to be great so there weren't any disappointments. APAC Sourcing Solutions, Ladderz HR, VServe and Scientity are the few companies which came to campus for recruitment. I applied for none.

Yesterday was a unique day for me. It was the start of something which I should have done long ago. Alongwith Raunak and Akhil, I went to Gurgaon for (let me keep it simple) visiting companies and trying to invite them to visit our campus. The objective was to make the presence of JBS felt in the corporate industry. With the correct attitude and right intentions, we set off in the morning at around 8:30.

We went to BioRad first. But to our disappointment, we found that the address given to us wasn't updated since years. BioRad had been shifted more than 3 years ago. huh! What a start!! Similarly Feedback Ventures was shifted something around three months back. F***. We never expected this.

Anyways, I am avoiding to give every minutest details. There was one wonderful thing that happened. We went to MicroMax Informatics Ltd. It is an upcoming company in manufacturing mobile handsets. Now we didn't have any contact number of HR person or even his/her name. An idea clicked to my mind. I caught hold of an employee of the same company who was just walking out of the building. I introduced myself and luckily, grabbed the HR person's name. Then, we went to the gatekeeper and told him that we want to meet this guy. Generally what happens is if you do not have any name or number of the person you want to meet, the guards turn you out. Well, we went in, had a (fortunately) healthy conversation with the HR guy. Similarly there was one more success - Tecnova.

The day finally came to an end at about 5 pm. We also went to Cargill, which the one of the leading food and agricultural products company. The environment was so professional that I found myself out of place. Similarly for BioRad!! The atmosphere really seemed terrific. I imagined how will I survive once I join any of these.

Overall, the day was below average. We were under-prepared. There has to be a set of procedure which needs to be followed. We don't know even what the company is all about and we ask them for a placement.. ridiculous!! I feel like taking the reigns of Training and Placements in my hands and I really think I can make a change. I would not like to comment on the present team and TPOs.

Well, we have exams from Monday and I haven't even begun preparations. CFA is on cards soon. I have to enroll for it ASAP. NCFM's last date is also round the corner. As far as the placement of mine is concerned, I am waiting for the correct job profile. I developed a theory today. There are three aspects to decide whether you should join a company or not. Those are Money, Profile and Brand. If you get two out of three of these, you can think of moving ahead. Till now, the maximum I have found is just one, so have avoided applying for them.

For the rest, I will continue later.

Bdays, Results and Placement season

2009-10-24T23:43:00.004+05:30

New trimester commenced day before yesterday. This time we have 6 courses in all + I plan to attend two extra ones. The time seems to be difficult. People have changed a lot. I dont want to, but I dont know why my ego is playing better of me this time. It has never happened before, whether in case of Nipun, Shanal, Rana, Rao, etc. But I am just fed up of making choices between people. If he is not your friend but mine, why would I stop talking to him only if I am friends to both of u? How childish is that!!

Anyways, it is Ridhima's birthday today. I gifted her a keychain. She is my latest friend and she is so cute. How wrong was I to form such an impression of her because of some other people's perspectives (though mine was also involved a little bit). We went to Lucknow together and came back together.

Saima got an F in IR. She is really very unlucky girl. I just pray that everything goes well for her but somehow it never happens. I just wish she passes in Stats this time.

By the way, the hottest news is that Sakshi came all the way from Agra to meet two of us - me and Yuvraj. We enjoyed but even she felt that people had changed a bit. I really just can't imagine 4 months ago we were so close and now there is so much of separateness. I just wish people become as they were. I don't want to lose any of my precious friends. Back to Sakshi, I went to the station to see her off. She was so happy yet so sad to leave us.

In the midst of all these, our results came out. Although I don't care much for them, I got 8.6 TGPA. And this time all because of my hard work. No group partner help, no buttering of teachers. All mine. After 1st semester of B.Tech., I crossed 8 all because of me myself. :)

Placements are about to begin. What evaded the DDMs for most of the time till now has come. We really need to gear up. Capital IQ and Grail Research are tentative companies to visit us. I need anyone of these badly. The job profile suits me - analyst. But right now, let me pray that they actually do come. I need to start preparing now, in addition to those 8 subjects. HRM is really crap, I don't like to study it. :(

Anyways, that is all for now. Cya laterzz :)

Diwali Vacations

2009-10-15T22:39:00.000+05:30

It has been 5 days since I am at Lucknow for my Diwali break. Tragedy struck when I came to know that internet connection was not possible this time around as the Apex Network, through which I had subscribed, had pulled down the shutters to his business. Airtel isn't operating in my locality, BSNL takes a minimum of 7 days. In these circumstances, I was feeling breathless. Imagine a drunkard not getting to drink for a week, or a chain smoker unable to have a cigarette for 7 days. I was also feeling my life choked, such has been an addiction to net.

However, I waited patiently and applied for Reliance Broadband Datacard. Now all the formalities have been done and probably I can access net 5 hours down the line from now (its 2 pm right now).

Day before yesterday, I went to Strokes with Victor, Sumant, Rashi and Neha. The curve of drinking has constantly been increasing for me over the last few weeks. But I am enjoying.. lolz :P It was so nice to be with Rashi and Neha once again. There are a lot of responsibities towards Victor, I haven't told anything about me over the last couple ofmonths. I know he would have known it from Rashi but it is my duty to tell first hand to my oldest friend. I am just waiting for an opportunity.

Sarang and Mayank are back in town after VaishnoDevi trip. Today I am going to Sarang's place. Apart from all these news, 30th Oct has been finalized for NCFM Capital Market Module Exam by Voila and me. Let's hope I finish those odd 250 pages - full of boring theory before that.

Day after is Diwali. Today is Dhanteras, I just wished I could purchase some Gold. Although it is already around Rs. 16000/10gm mark but the purchase hasn't seen a slowdown in the market.

Lately, I am being just desperate to be recruited by Grail Research, even it pays around 3.5 lpa. The job profile might suit me. I hope my analytical and statistical skills get used because I don't know anything else other than these.

On 20th Oct, I am returning back, for another gruelling session of MBA. And this time it will extend to 6 months, in addition to all the placement activities going around. I am feeling very uncomfortable though, in company of Yuvraj and Parth. I just hope we get back on track once again.

Anyways, Happy Diwali to all.

The daunting task of surviving the sleep

2009-10-07T04:17:00.002+05:30

The exam season is on, and as usual, this is my favorite time. I might have not learnt anything from my B.Tech. 4 year course, but I have learnt to enjoy exams. This is a phase where we have a goal, where we know what we have to do. Otherwise, in non-exam days, majority of the time goes in deciding what should we do next [:D]

Anyways, we are down with two of them - SCM & TQM. Both went well, although preparation was not upto the mark. Now tomorrow is PAF (Project Appraisal and Financing), and by tomorrow I mean after 5 hours. And I set a near impossible task of completing the entire (near-entire.. about 80%) of the book in the next 3 hours. It is 4:30 am and by 7:30 am, I have to survive the sleep. Seeing Yuvi sleep so calmly in the bed next to me, make this task more daunting.

I made a quote today.. "Exams are an excuse to learning". Now I don't know whether such kind of a quote already exists, but I swear I made the above one on my own. So.... COPYRIGHT. [:)]

Had a fight with Saima two hours ago. Uff, these girls. I just can't stay angry with her. Impossible for me. I am going to apologize to her tomorrow, though I don't find any mistake of mine [:P] Things are going well these days. I am now just waiting for 10th October, when I will be leaving for home.

I'll post in the comment section tomorrow about my competition with sleep. By the way, telecom sector dipped heavily today. Bharti Airtel, Reliance Communications and Idea lost around 10% each in the equity market. Had I known this during the trading session, I would have purchased it. But then, no money in the account. [:(]

Call me emotional? You are right!!

2009-09-30T23:54:00.002+05:30

I don't know why I get emotionally attached with everyone that the slightest of ignorance on their part blows my mind away completely. Rashi asked me the same question how is it possible for me to get emotionally attached to each person I converse to. I really had no answer. What should I say to her? I just can not afford to inflict mental, physical or emotional pain to anyone. I just can't see anyone hurt because of me. I can definitely do this, but only to those who have done same with me.

I don't think there would be anyone with whom I hadn't fought atleast once except Harsha. And the fight is not which is face to face, it is within. Of late, Yuvraj and Parth are behaving absurd. For Parth, I can understand. But Yuvraj was one of my best friends I had during the last few months. Saima has started acting strange, I feel. Then Rashi doesn't talk properly now. Neha has also cut down drastically on the conversations. Victor doesn't call since he has been committed to Rashi. Megha came to Delhi and even after asking her to call so many times, she didn't.

These are some people whom I love so much and can go to any extent to make them happy. But when they behave like this, it simmers my blood. May be there is some other reason for them to behave like this, or may be I am acting too possessive and over-reacting.

But then, there is a certain hint that by caring for someone too much, I am intervening in their personal lives. Example is Saima. I just want all of them to be the happiest, and I try my best to make them. But always there is a point, where I feel I over-do.

Overall, the point is to learn from Parth. Don't attach yourself with everyone. First think for yourself and then for the betterment of others, and that too is not important. Yuvraj has learnt this art it seems, and I need to follow. But my instincts do not allow me.

According to Saima, I might have loads of friends. But there is no one except Harsha and Gaurangi, whom really I can depend upon. I miss Madhur too. The attractive looking life of mine is very hollow from inside. I want someone to take care of me now, I really want.

There, certainly, are people who are so good. Prachi, Pratyush, Ahinsa, Akanksha, Abhishek, Arunesh, etc. I just wish I get solace. The mind is bursting now.

The Debate

2009-09-27T02:46:00.002+05:30

Of late, visit to this place has only been confined to times when I had been low. The direct and obvious reason is that this place is the best balm for a bruised heart. I can pour out my distressed feelings in my own way. Like it is said, share your griefs to lessen them, this is my best friend to share. But today, the purpose is different. There is a mixed feeling today.

I had a debate today - for macroeconomics course : internal assessment. Now, this was the first debate I was facing (don't get surprised), on any topic other than Sachin. And that too, first time publicly. And above all, each of my 5 group members knew literally nothing on the topic, which was "Is WPI still relevant in current Indian economic scenario?" and we were to speak for the motion.

I researched for much of the time yesterday, to find many more facts and figures than I already had. I knew Arunesh knew nothing on this subject. Deepti and Kanika are unbankable when it comes to logic (sorry!!), Yuvraj could have handled but he takes things jokingly, and finally I had full confidence on Parth, who did all to shatter it.

We started. We had formulated a sequence about who has to speak when. Arunesh, then Deepti and then Kanika exhausted their turns speaking just about 30 seconds each and that too reading from an aid. Yuvraj did marginally better, but his English pronounciation always troubles him. I can say he is a bit over confident. My trump card, Parth, in his very own way, presented on the topic, but he did one big mistake. He brought CPI into the focus. We had discussed before (when he wasn't there - just because he didnt want to be with commoners like us.. huh attitude) that we will not be uttering anything about CPI, but he did. Then I had to sum it up in 60 seconds.

I had to cover all the untouched points which these 5 had forgotten to speak. This took about 60 seconds already and then after warning, I began with the probable solution to the WPI approach. When I was done, which according to me, was a decent performance according to my standards. This was probably the best I have ever spoken publicly. I forgot just 2-3 points and that too because of lack of time, otherwise I was okay.

The other group then started with "Our friends did not propose any solution and just banked on CPI". I know they were wrong because my last two sentences gave a probable measure, which they probably might have missed. I knew I would counter them when Yuvraj insisted on having the mic. I took it from Deepti and refused to hand it over to Yuvraj and then he uttered unnecessarily without the mic in between their argument. And it was a baseless point. When you do not have sufficient knowledge on the topic and are unprepared, better keep your mouth shut. But he has to speak, because he HAS to speak. What followed was a heated argument and then Sir overruled the objection. The mockery from the audience was at its peak.

I felt bad. I intervened. Now the consequence was that we wasted our alloted time. Had Yuvraj kept his mouth shut, and after their views, we would have countered, there would probably be better understanding of what I had to say. All 6 from their side were speaking and here, we were a one-man army. No one was backing me. Not even Parth. He invited all the trouble of putting the CPI thing on the floor and now he was silent. And guess what, he got an A+, and we all got an A. Although I dont care for grades, yet this wasnt fare at all.

Anyways, it ended. Sir appereciated at the end. I felt nice when some of the fellow students said that I spoke the best of all. I wished MBA full time students would also have been there. This was my favourite topic and I did my level best, so I am happy.

Rest all is good. There is an AGM of Jaiprakash Associated on 29th Sept in out Auditorium. I am craving to attend it, but I feel we will not be permitted. Exams are beginning next Monday. On 10th I would be back home. On 2nd Oct, meanwhile, I might be meeting Monu Bhaiyya. He is coming to Delhi from Indonesia. Let's see how things shape up. Tomorrow, I am leaving for Chandni Chowk. It is already 3. I dont know how will I wake up.

By the way, India lost its first even match in a World Cup against Pakistan. Sachin scored 8, and as always, everyone is after his life. Suckers!!

Mid September issue :P

2009-09-20T16:52:00.002+05:30

Days are not going off well. There is a huge workload. MBA is really demanding. We are having classes on Sundays also. Fortunately, tomorrow is Eid, so we are getting a day off nearly after 20 days.

Apart from the above excuses (coz JBS workload is nothing in comparison to IIMs etc), personally also, I am feeling down these days. The reason is not a physical disorder (fever, etc.) but mentally, I am out of touch. Whether it is my inherent character or what, I am unable to sustain friends. Call it my lack of patience handling some of them or failing to act according to their expectations, I am clueless. Sometimes, the reasons are blurred, and I am not a gifted soul to see the blurred images properly. Hence, these problems!! It is not the first time I am going through all these, but then.. till when?

Anyways, Saima has gone to Lucknow for Eid. She is like a blessing these days. She is sweet, just like one would expect a Lucknow girl to be. No attitude, no arrogance!! Delhi is short of such people these days. :)

Group dynamics have taken a toll in the past few days. Nearly all the cases and presentations are done by me and Yuvi only. But we are not complaining. The major flaw I have noticed in myself is that howsoever prepared I might be, I tend to forget things infront of public. How could I forget that part of TQM case, when I had prepared so well!! Can't forgive myself for making such errors.

I felt nice to give Dr. Hima Gupta, our faculty, two brilliant counter replies. It was awesome.

Apart from this, answer sheets of the exams were shown. I have performed good, if not very good or excellent. Marks are generally around 20-21 out of 30 and the class average has been around 16-17. Anyways, it was a good experience giving JBS exams full fledgedly for the first time.

Yesterday, I felt good becoming a mediator in patching up of Saima and Priya. There are also some stupids against whom I want to write, but can't. You see, some ethics need to be maintained. :P

At the moment, I am just waiting for 10th October, to go back to home. Voila is going back 3 days later. She is so lucky. Anyways, humare bhi din ayenge. :P

The 3 weeks story

2009-09-06T03:51:00.002+05:30

Ok.. Ok.. I know.. I have been alien to this place since last few weeks. Although I have an excuse that exams were going on, so couldn't get time but then won't it be an insult to my prestigious engineering skills where I learnt not to panic even during the toughest exams? Where I learnt to appear for them without even studying a single word? Where I learnt that exams are always secondary, and your passion first?

So, there are no excuses, I am simply sorry - sorry to myself, and ya.. anyone who STILL reads my blogs. Can I please know him/her who still visits this page? Please comment, you will make my day. :)

Right.. so much of stuff that I am clueless where to begin from. Day before yesterday concluded the Paryushan Parv. After 4 straight years, I once again was lucky to fast. Ok I'll explain. My family is very religious and papa lays stress upon following religion passionately. And I agree with him. When I was in Lucknow, I always fasted (though my fasting is not like spending the day without water, or only water) in the best possible way. In my first year, I talked to the mess incharge and she agreed to give me some Jain food (without the root vegies and in daylight). It went off successfully. But in my second year, she was a bit cold to receive my requests which were turned down. Since that year, I never fasted on Paryushan Parv.

This year, third day I got to know that there is again a special arrangement for food for us. And about 10 people are there to take benefit from the opportunity. This was a jackpot for me. Food without onion.. just what I always crave for. Although many a times, I remained hungry for 10 continuous hours, those meals in the evening were fun. I had to sacrifice my favourite aloo ka parantha in the breakfast as well once.

In between, and still continuing.. happened the examinations. First ones as full time MBA students. Here we have only mid sem and end sems unlike JIIT where there were T-1,2,3. And this time we were made to sit in the Auditorium. It was a sort of joke as we had no clue how could we sit in the Audi (plz dont get confused with that AUDI :P). However after the initial two days of mismanagement, everything fell back in place as soon as the Registrar took charge. Exams are going on well, although this objective and subjective different papers concept is a bit absurd, but all in all, exams are no big deal for us (Btechs).

I taught Stats to many juniors and Saima (my classmate). Teaching them was difficult but fun. They had no mathematical background and it was tough for me to nail the concepts into their brains. But finally, no one did exam well. Sumant also was one of the students, with Nupur and Kanika adding to the glamour :P Jyoti and Deepak was a different lot. So, I had to repeat the same things about 4-5 times. It was so irritating.

Today was Teacher's Day. And first time in history of JIITU, it was celebrated. It went off average. Okay the interesting part, 10 of us got seated on the same bench in the Auditorium. 5 girls and 5 guys. Of them 4 were in couples. The lone guy sitting was ofcourse me. And please dont even think of it that the 5th lone girl could have become a couple with me. I would rather prefer to be single all my life. :P

There is a rumour that about 50 students have to redo their report work. I just pray I am not among those. Baar baar ye kaam mujhse nahi hota.

Apart from this, all is well. Some things are too personal to be written here. I know there is no reader left but why to take a risk? Afterall, my constant eyes and mind are on the comments section. Pleaseeeeeeeeee, is there anyone left?

Internship Viva

2009-08-14T01:53:00.002+05:30

I know I have been extremely late for this post. My internship viva was on the 7th of August. But lately, due to a number of reasons, I couldn't post it before. Now here is the brief transcript.

It was in the evening of 6th August, that I came to know about my scheduled viva the very next day. Since the real internship was not so genuine, as I had gone to Reliance communications hardly 20% of the days altogether, I knew I had to cook up fake stories infront of the panel members.

Parth told me the very first day that panelists are grilling hard, with Prof. Wahi leading the forefront. We had never met Prof. Wahi before. He had just joined the institute and wasn't taking any course. So it would be like a real job interview.

I don't think so I will leave my B.Tech. habits ever. I woke up till late night, reading my report and re-reading it and got late to wake up in the morning. We were to assemble in the waiting room at 9:30 am and we (Yuvraj and me) departed from the room not before 10:30. When we reached there, we got to know that still no. 6 is going on. Yuvraj was 9th and I was 10th. But the bubble exploded when we were informed that a total of six panel members were ready to tear us apart. Usually there are three or four. Lucky us :P

By the time Lalit (8th) was being interviewed, 4 panelists went out one after another but at the same time, which made only 2 of them interviewing at a point of time. But by the time I had my turn, there were a total of four again. Prof. Wahi was there, along with Prof. G.K. Agarwal, Dr. Rahul Sharma and Miss Sujata Kapoor. The latter were the mentors also, so they were deemed to be there.

I was asked questions only by the former two. Prof. Agarwal started, "I'll ask you only 4 questions: where did you do your internship, in which firm did you do it, what did you gain from the internship and what did the organization gained from you?"

I started in English and Hindi mix - with complete confidence (quite unusual for me). Then Prof. wahi interrupted, "khichdi kya paka rahe ho? ek bhasha me bolo. English nahi ati?" This shattered my confidence, although I continued in English. There were some parts where I lacked, some which I passed through easily.

Overall, it went for about 11-12 minutes (average was about 16-17 minutes). I would say it went average - not too good not too bad. It is okay for a person who really did not take his internship seriously.

On the miscellaneous account, we, the finance students, are not having serious classes since we have begun with our MBA. Hardly 3 to 4 hours a day. We know that from coming week, it would be around 8 hours a day for us too, like marketing students are facing these days. But even though classes are not being held properly, I find myself busier than ever. Even my favourite Gtalk's attendance has fallen miserably :P

I have become adamant to work as an analyst and I am trying hard for it. I'll say the rest later. Next three days I am alone in the hostel. Yuvraj has gone home. :(

Attempt to survive

2009-08-06T22:06:00.005+05:30

This is what my current situation is

बाँवरे नैना .... भरें रहे रात भर .....

सोयें जागे .... जागे सोयें

जाने किस बात पर

मन खुश भी है ..बेचैन भी

उलझन कैसी दिन रैन की ...

अब तू ही आके बोल कान्हा

गांठे सारी खोल

तू जो कह दे जल जाऊँ

इस आग पर .....चल जाऊँ .......

मन चाहे पंख लगाकर

सारी खुशियाँ ये पाकर

कहीं उड़ जाऊँ

इन मुस्कानों पे मेरा

अधिकार है क्या ये सोचूं

मैं डर जाऊँ

हस्ते क़दमों से जो बढ़ जाऊँ

कहीं राहों में न खो जाऊँ ..

अब तू ही आके बोल कान्हा

गांठे सारी खोल

तू जो कह दे जल जाऊँ

इस आग पर .....चल जाऊँ ........

कागज़ के निकले सारे

उड़ गए सब जाने कहाँ रे

पल चाहत के

ऐसे बदला ये मंज़र

कुछ टूट गया मेरे अन्दर

बिन आहट के

एहसास जगाये तूने जिस दिल में

फिर तोड़ा वही दिल कैसे तूने

अब तू ही आके बोल कान्हा

गांठे सारी खोल

तू जो कह दे जल जाऊँ

इस आग पर .....चल जाऊँ ........

जो टूट गए हैं सपने

जाने क्यूँ बनकर अपने

लौट आते हैं

नहीं मंजिल जिन रास्तों पर

क्यूँ उनपे कदम रुक रुक कर

बढ़ जाते हैं

वोह तेरा नहीं सुन मन पगले

क्यूँ माने न तू

क्यूँ न संभले

अब तू ही आके बोल कान्हा

गांठे सारी खोल

तू जो कह दे जल जाऊँ

इस आग पर .....चल जाऊँ ........

बाँवरे नैना ....भरें रहे रात भर .....

सोयें जागे .... जागे सोयें

जाने किस बात पर

मन खुश भी है ..बेचैन भी

उलझन कैसी दिन रैन की ..

Again the unfortunate me

2009-08-06T11:01:00.002+05:30

I am in the state of shock since yesterday after talking to Victor. I have again been bereft of something whom I loved so much. The pain and agony has filled in me to the brim. I do not know how to react, what should I do? Should I keep my friend on top or myself? I have suffered on the same lines before also. Although this is not new to me, but I think no one would be more unfortunate than me.

Survival is becoming difficult now. I don't even feel like playing guitar now. The motivation has been deprived. I have to talk to her, and explain everything. Why does this always happen to me? I am so very hurt. I can not concentrate on studies even.

Friendship's day

2009-08-03T01:23:00.002+05:30

It was friendship's day yesterday and I had seen the worst of days with my two best friends just a couple of hours ago. It is really a very pathetic feeling. I have felt it before when Shanal called up the closest friendship with me for Shruti. And the same has been repeated. Why do I even introduce my friends to the girls I speak?

I watched Love Aj Kal yesterday. Not a good movie. Only hype was there. Amidst that, I say that Voila is one of the best things that has happened to me in my entire life till now. There is no one like her and can't be like her. She is the best of the best.

These days majority of my time goes into practising guitar. I think I am addicted. :(

Even though I have so much work and no time, I am back to my B.Tech. habits. Nothing much to say, mood boht off hai...

byeee

5th year begins

2009-07-27T19:57:00.003+05:30

What I was about to right a few minutes ago had a complete transformation. But I'll disclose nitty gritty of my well being (or not) over these days.

I reached the college day before yesterday. The 5th year - oh my God!! The JBS year, as I had expected, was going to be tougher. Tougher will not be the right word as I never found B.Tech. tough. The worst part this year is not the burden of studies but the loneliness I find here with all my engineering friends now have disappeared from the campus. My eyes are always searching for them in the crowd.

Sometimes, I feel I am seeing Lanka walking down from the second floor and saying, "kya kar raha hai be?" or I would see Kushal going to the temple in his ever fastest stride with his hair dancing around his forehead. I miss my CC partners to the extent I have stopped doing the activity. Madhur, Rao and Ghosh - my caustic confederates - enjoying the CC activity from 12 to 2 continuously. I won't be getting those days back. I crave for them. I crave to want them back. Sakshi, I always assume you are just going to come out of the girls hostel with your sweet smile and say, "yaha kaha tehel rahe ho?"

Though this is the main reason I am unable to survive these days, there is one more of it, which I can not disclose here. That I'll do at the right time. But this is the mood swing of mine that I am feeling unable to breathe a fresh air.

Classes commenced today. We had only one class today - service management. Let us see how do I cope up with so many issues and concentrate on studies for the remaining 8 months.

My school buddies - I love you so much

2009-07-21T02:39:00.002+05:30

Finally tomorrow is the final day. I am going to submit the project report tomorrow to Mr. Wahi. I confess here that majority of it is copied but then even Mr. Wahi gave me persmission to do that. :P

After work, I have to head towards Ganj to meet Rashi. Seriously speaking, it has been a pleasure talking to her these holidays. Where was she hiding all these years? Even 2 to 3 hour long chats seem little. I re-iterate, she is a very wonderful girl.

Gudia went to Delhi today. It was one of the worst departure one could have seen. Papa and Gudia had a very heated arguments which ended up in tears. I blame myself for it somewhere. Even I have started to feel that Gudia is right when she says I am a dual faced personality - different for different people. Infact the best word would be Diplomat.

But I feel I am ruining myself only. Yesterday was also one such awful day. I think I have to choose between people now. I have always wanted to befriend with everyone. But when the friends turn foes among themselves, I am left with choices to make. This is stupid!!

By the way, I am in no mood to go to the college on 24th July. These 8 weeks had been so fun. I know I have spoiled a golden chance by turning down the internship opportunity at Delhi, but then atleast I made up for my mistake in some way. I knew this was my last chance to have fun, may be in life, with my oldest and truest friends.

Sometimes I wonder, why only long term friendship continues in this best way. Victor, Mayank, Sarang, Rashi, Shiven, Sumant... all of whom I know for more than 17 years and the strong bond still is so strong, even if some disappeared for years in between (Sumant and Rashi). Madhur, Kushal, Sakshi and Yuvraj, whom I met at college are also my great buddies but something is different with these school chums.

Anyways, it is toooooo late. Gudnite!!

The unusual Sunday

2009-07-19T07:50:00.003+05:30

A Sunday for many means getting up at 11 in the morning. But what is not a Sunday for me in these 2 month internship break? Whenever I do not go to the office (which is in most of the cases), I get up usually around this time. So every day is a Sunday for me. But this Sunday is different.

It is 7:50am and I am awake since an hour, despite the fact that I slept at 4. No, I dont have any pending work to finish or an exam or a prior commitment. Actually, Ahinsa has come to Lucknow for her Axis bank exam and I do not know how my sleep had broken at such early hours.

Since an hour, I have been updating her with the latest current affairs. She has the old list of the Cabinet Ministers, etc. before the ministry regained its power and was changed on 22nd May, 2009. Anyways, I have and am doing my best. I have always liked her since we met for the first time a month ago in a marriage. She is my cousin's cousin, so we aren't related directly. But I like her as a sister and a friend, a sweet girl she is!!

Probably, I go back to sleep within few minutes only to get up around afternoon. I have to complete the monstrous and boring task of the report to be handed over tomorrow. I wish I could complete it on time to have a chance to meet Rashi on Tuesday (day after).

Chalo, goodnight. :)

The Day with (G)old(en) friends

2009-07-16T01:21:00.003+05:30

Today was one of the best days of my life in recent times. Coming to Lucknow to do the internship had a reason. Although I did the mistake by trading it off by doing a stupid internship so as to remain with family and old school friends, I did enjoy a lot.

I met so many old school friends who probably had lost in the tides of time but thanks to Orkut, we are never separated. I met Rashi Garg today. It was a pleasure meeting her. She is as sweet as sugar. :P I never felt I was talking to her face to face for the first time in my life. Incredible girl!!

Then came the big occasion. After meeting Rashi and her friend Neha, I went to Vindeez, Gomtinagar. Victor gave his birthday treat and there were Sumant, Mukul, Mayank and Sarang too. Had Ankit Misra, who was slated to come, also been there, it would be a get together of class 1 to 6 'A' section "children". And it would have been double bonanza.. meeting seeing Rashi and Ankit both for the first time in 12 years. But unfortunately, he couldn't come.

Even Atish could not make it because of some personal problems, although we went to his home in the afternoon. Then we headed towards our usual desination, Wave. We sat in the McD for about two hours, doing our usual work.. (people close to me will understand :D) Came back to home at 8.

Here's a snap of us in McD, Wave (Sarang clicking the pic)

We missed few people a lot, Anshul Dwivedi being the prominent of them. Yash and Shiven were the other two of the A section that are close to us but weren't there. Unfortunately, as I always am, there was no girl. :(

Budget Day 2009-10

2009-07-07T01:06:00.003+05:30

The carefree attitude of mine continues and I have not been to the training since last 5 days. I was about to go today (6th july) but the budget stopped me. Now that I am more aware of the financial terms these days (thanks to free time I am getting out of my training that I can spare some for reading texts in abundance), I was pretty excited to hear my life's first live budget.

The budget was hailed as poor by general people but the experts are saying that owing to the economic crisis in the world, this has been the best what our honorable Finance Minister could do. But the implications reflected on the market soon which fell down like anything just after the bedget session - 900 points today. That stood most of the shares well below the mark, and it was a boom time for investors to purchase. Luckily, I got my demat account activated today itself and invested some money - MY FIRST TRADING.

It was a dramatic two hour period before the SMC trading window as being a novice, I was hardly understanding anything. Because of the lack of this, I incurred a loss, a meagre Rs. 3 :P

By the way, I am feeling a little gay these days. U dirty mind, gay also means happy. Legalization of gayism has certainly put you people's mind out of place these days, right? :P Well I am feeling happier these days because of a reason, not right enough to disclose here.

I am finally going to training tomorrow. Please God! wake me up anyhow tomorrow morning. :(

But for that I have to sleep early, it is already 1:15 am. Goodnight...

Finally some stupid Data Entry

2009-07-02T01:00:00.002+05:30

I went to Magnum day before yesterday to collect some official documents as promised by Mr. Sanjay Wahi there. The fortunes turned the table the previous night, when Mr. Amitabh Banerjee, with whose source I got into Reliance, visited my house. He interrogated me about my progress and told that he would recommend Wahi Sir to give me some training in SAP Fi/Co as well. I could not but accept the offer.

Next day when I was standing just beside Wahi Sir, Amitabh uncle called him and kept his word. What was next? Wahi Sir asked me to join two of the other trainees who were sitting together infront of a computer. He asked me to call them. I did not notice thme initially apart from that one was a heavy built guy and other was a short but little healthy. They went to Wahi sir who told them I would be joining them from the day and I should be educated about the IUC.

I joined them. It was a very informal introduction. The healthy guy, Vivek Verma, is a totally freaked out, mischievous guy who hates studying. He is just like Apoorv Mathur, my neighbour, in looks as well as body language. The other, Sreejit, stutters a lot, which reminds me of my school friend, Nitin. He is a total workaholic guy. Even the useless data entry work he does by full enthusiasm. If I do not pretend to be selfish, he deserves to get a PPO in Reliance Telecomm, even if its a 1.2 lakh job.

I was told that there are two immediate mentors, who are responsible for the IUC (Interconnectivity Usage Charges), to whom we have to report. Both are beyond my linkings.

Yesterday, I came back home at 7pm. Except for the JBS classes, I think this is the maximum I have worked in so many years. I went at 10:30 today morning and came back at 6. There was some lame excuses involved otherwise I would have been stuck there till about 8 today, just fooling around, warming the chair. Sreejit does all the work and I dont mind. I know whatever he is doing is useless from training point of view. It is just helping to learn basics of Excel - no hard point.

Tomorrow I am going again to take some material from Vivek. Hope he brings them and I may start with my report work from tomorrow, though I am thinking this since two weeks.

My mood is out of place today. I don't know what it was but suddenly seemed to be ignored by 4-5 persons in a row, especially by my princess, Voila. This miffed me. Fought with sis as well. So bad. Anyways, it is over 1 am now. Couldnt wake up tomorrow morning if I continue here. Gudnite

Feeling very lonely

2009-06-28T01:34:00.002+05:30

What I loved passionately a year ago, I am running away from it. I dont feel like writing articles in the way I did last year any more. The frequency, though, is still alright but the content and the style is lacking. I can feel it. It is just because I am no more interested to sit for an hour to think, ponder and form the words. I am no more interested to give my piece a divine beauty.

I have always felt that if your form is not good, just watch your previous masterpieces and you will get the motivation. But I dont even feel like reading what I had written all these years. My new website and blog is also going waste. No source of revenue, which I had planned, is coming.

I am constantly thinking about a business plan these days, though I am cent percent convinced that I am not going for a start up without a three to four years experience. But then why dont ideas click me? What can I do with Rs. 5000 in my hand? Why can't I make big? Because I am lazy. Prachi di said that now it is time to do something. Enough of thinking. She is right. I have spoiled my MBA internship also. This time I lacked the knowledge about how and where should I do the training. I have been constantly bashing Anjali about the lack of knowledge she always has about her future but this time it has back fired on me. How foolish I am to opt for Operations in Reliance Comm and on top of that, I dont go there. I know JBS is not going to lead me anywhere.

Having said all this, I plan to invest some money in stock market. Hope luck prevails. Papa has lost much in this, I hope to get it back. Day didnt go well. Bas mood hi kuch kharab ho raha hai ajkal. Mama and family went back to Gwalior today. Papa and Anjali are also not at home. Only me and mummy. Feeling very lonely.

The trading beckons me

2009-06-21T23:09:00.003+05:30

The days are passing at a tremendous pace. It happens when you usually enjoy what you are doing and wanting it to continue. And I am into my favourite hobby these days - chilling at home.

It has already been 21 days today - 3 weeks. I can call these days as a 3 week holiday because I don't think I have justified the loss (read: waste) of time. I have gone to the warehouse some three or four times. The monotonous work there doesn't demand me visiting that place so frequently. The last I went was Monday and tomorrow I again plan to go, and it is Monday again.

Now giving some leniency to criticizing my attitude, I am actually not sitting that idle also. These days I am into the stock market trading. I am going to apply for the demat account in SMC (ya I know it can be a wrong decision but Ankit bhai is there in SMC to take care of me). I am reading articles and learning the ABCD of trading. Hopefully, I will start with it within a couple of days.

Day before yesterday I went to apply for my PAN card. I am expecting it within 10-12 days. Passport work also needs to be done.

I have decided to delay the NCFM examination from 4th July to sometime in August. The reason is that the course is enough and Voila can never finish it till 4th now as she hasn't even begun. And we had promised to give all of them together. :)

Rest all is fine. I'll being with the report work from tomorrow I hope. Will continue then!!

The day at corporate world

2009-06-18T19:17:00.002+05:30

So, today I have some real stuff to write. There is a feeling of self satisfaction today. And I would like to thank Voila for that.

I was never requested so much by anyone till now. And when the other person is the sweetest Voila, it was very difficult for me to procrastinate the work for over 3 weeks. Actually as a part of her internship, she had to get some 250 odd survey questionnaires filled by some corporate people who invest money in any kind of securities. It was a difficult job for a person like me who never liked the field work and more so, a work like this - requesting people to lend their 5 min and then rudely be turned down and shown the door. I find this work similar to kind of salesman job whom we treat like a beggar "bhaiyya nahi chaiye.. aage jao" when they come to our home.

She gave me offers - a treat at McD. But I wasnt interested in all these. I just help her because I like to help her... etc etc. :)

I had some work in Magnum Eldeco office of Reliance. It has been three days I went to the warehouse. Oh God! what great people they have there. It is my luck that I always have an upperhand at any place I go or work I do. Touchwood! All of them are always ready to help me and provide every information. Even though they are busy, they find time to help me out. I go there whenever I wish and come from there at my will. I went to Magnum today to get some documents like balance sheet, company profile, etc. I had been asked to wait till Monday, but then Mr. Sanjay Wahi, too, is a great person. Where do they hire such generous people from in Reliance. I just wish to work with them.

Anyways, I headed towards Voila's home after that. We departed from there at about 1. Our first desination was... umm... actually I don't remember because we were thrown out from so many places. :P

But overall, we covered Max New York Life Insuarance, Sony, ICICI Lombard, ICICI Life Insurance, Western Union, HDFC Life Insurance and Nokia Seimens. We were shown the door so modestly at each place. They didn't let us feel ashamed, [:P] although we tasted success at ICICI Lombard (voila's first initiation - strike rate 100%). We handed over about 20 questionnaires there and have been asked to collect them tomorrow. Let's see if they do not dissapoint us.

Though this took just an hour, we felt a lot tired. Temperature was around 45 deg celcius and Voila is so brave to have faced it sportingly [:P]. We went to Waves and stayed there for an hour before we found SBI at the top floor. That was the place where we were successful. The only reason being they were sitting idle. Ab kaun jana hai malls me account khulwane.

We were then 'physically and morally' ready for an exit from Waves to again face the heat. We went to Reliance House. Assuming it is a sister organization, we would be taken hand in hand. And we were. The HR Manager ordered the employees to co-operate with us. 5 successes there.

As soon as I stepped out, I said, "Bas Voila, enough." And that was the end of our first day in corporate world. A feeling which is amazing if now felt. Though humiliated, it is the ground reality for everyone - a thing we knew so didn't care. Overall, a satisfying day when at night I can tell myself - I did something worth today.

And Voila, if you read this, I M NOT GOING THERE AGAIN. :P

The laziness

2009-06-13T14:08:00.002+05:30

It has been a four days gap. This writing practice, what I acquired in the month of September last year, is not coming back to me.

I went to thewarehouse on Wednesday. The employees are so helpful and down to earth there that even if I have no good work to do, I still feel like going there. The support from other people is so important to do any kind of work, but in today's corporate world, you can't expect everyone to be nice. And when you are doing an internship, where you are considered a burden on the organization (if they have no work to provide), you start feeling left out, ignored and sequentially irritated.

I lack this fighting spirit which will prove very costly to me. I just fail to butter people, to implement their commands even if they are useless or weird, to listen to people if I have no fault, etc. The adage, "Boss is always right" does not suit me. My friends say that it is better you start your own venture then. But capital kaha se laun?

Anyways, it has been three days I haven't stepped out to work. I had to go today but then ye aalas. Now looking forward to meet some forlorn friends this weekend. Rest later!! ye gudia yaha aake beth jati hai to me kuch likh nahi pata.

Blood Test just before an interview

2009-06-09T21:32:00.002+05:30

Time is running out fast now. I procrastinated the work which should have been completed yesterday to today. And moreover, I had to give the blood test. I have been to the pathology several times in my childhood for the blood test, but this time it was about 8 years later. And it also was the first time I was going all alone.

After about half an hour of wait in the pathology waiting lounge, they called me and 10 ml of blood was sucked out of my arm. I advanced to the MicroSave. It was so hot that I felt I was going to MicroSave in the Microwave. :P

Thank God the room was air conditioned. By the way, MicroSave is a global company, with its offices at Kenya and Uganda also. Lucknow was India's office (first time I heard Lucknow is the sole place for a multinational organization to open a corporate office).

Around 20 minutes later, Mr. Manish Mehrotra came out. Against my expectations, he was a very tall guy, highly sophisticated and truly professional. He had a great body language and great personality. I explained my reason of visit but he nearly turned down my addmission to training. He asked me to leave the documents (CV, training letter, etc.) with him and he would inform me soon.

I don't know if I am being pessimistic, but it seems I don't have a chance here although I am highly eager to work with them. Just for once, I pray, I get to work with them!!

Dejected, I came back to home by around 1. Went to Voila's place at 4 to study the balance sheets. By the time I returned from there at around 7, I was feeling very laid back. The reason is to be kept secret. :)

Tomorrow I am going to Reliance otherwise by trying at multiple places simultaneously, I would be left with no where to go. Hope I have a good day at Reliance warehouse tomorrow.

FINO or MicroSave?

2009-06-08T15:03:00.003+05:30

The temperature here at Lucknow is around 45 deg Celcius and I was out of the house in search of a new internship. FINO was my destination and I was escorted by my father to talk about it with some Mr. Pramod Chandra, who is the head of a career consultancy near his office.

We went to papa's office first, he had some official work. After about one hour, we headed towards Mr. Chandra's office, to talk about some reference in FINO. He asked my stream and the kind of work I intended to do and told me that FINO was not meant for me. He told that in FINO they would send me to rural areas to do some consumer behaviour research - a total field work in this scorching heat. If I had to do this only, I would have done this at Standard Chartered in Delhi. Why would I come here at Lucknow leaving such a prestigious company? Agreed FINO is one of the fastest growing company in India and is headed for success sooner or later, the work allotted to me will not be of my interest area. (nothing against FINO)

He then counselled me to take up some training experience with MicroSave. It is a microfinancial company which provides solutions and loans to poor and near-poor people. We (me and papa) went in search of the company but didn't find it for about 20 minutes. He had some work, so he dropped me and left. And then it was I alone searching for that.

After another 20-minute of search, I finally found it. It was a house in which they had opeoed this MicroSave. Centrally air conditioned, it seemed some serious work happens there. Mr. Chandra asked me to meet Mr. Manish Mehrotra. I had reached there at 2:15 pm, so when I asked the receptionist about him, he asked me to come after lunch at 3.

It was a big setback as I was very thirsty and my stamina had given way. Since the last three hours, I was roaming in the scorching Sun and I could not afford to wait for another 45 min. I called papa and he asked me to come back and we will again go tomorrow now. So another day wasted.

My first week of MBA internship

2009-06-07T20:17:00.003+05:30

This was the time last year when I actually began with the serious writing stuff. June is yet again here and I am back in Lucknow, for yet another internship - this time for MBA.

Last year, I went to IOCL for a day before giving up and then leisurely enjoying at home for the complete two months to make it a 'memorable summer vacations'. But this time some seriousness has seized me and I plan to take up the internship thing seriously.

There was a time few months back when I was stranded with no company to work with. Then the Training and Placement cell of the college came up with some PSUs and randomly alloted them to us. I was alloted Central Warehousing Corporation (CWC). I wanted some serious stuff in Finance but was getting it no where. I had little will to work with a PSU. So I relied back on my father.

He came up with some source in Reliance, ShareKhan and PTC Industries (Operations) in Lucknow and Standard Chartered Bank and SMC in Delhi. I wanted to go home so I discarded the Delhi options. I interrogated what kind of work I would get at Reliance Infocomm - they promised some work in finance but I tried PTC Industries. They turned me down instantaneously. ShareKhan provided work in Sales so I turned it down. I was only left with Reliance.

On 2nd June, I went to its Gomtinagar office. It was so professional out there unlike at IOCL where I went last year. The receptionist enquired in detail about my purpose of the visit. Then one Mr. Satya came to guide us (me and my father) towards a Discussion Room where he asked me my college training letter and CV. After about 4-5 questions, he asked me to come from 5th June because Mr. Wahi, under whom I was supposed to carry out my work, was on leave.

I enjoyed the extra two days I was granted and went back there on 5th. I reached there sharp at 10 am as directed. Mr. Satya came to the reception desk to take me to Mr. Wahi inside. The door could be opened by swiping a card which I was not having, so was helped by Mr. Satya to let me in. I was handed over my training letter and commanded to get a photocopy. The photocopy system was also highly organized. I had to do an entry in the register before getting it.

I went to Mr. Wahi with it who enquired about the kind of work I would like to do. He suggested that I should do something in Operations and advised me to visit their warehouse - some 25 kms from my home. I reluctantly agreed. I had to, there was no other option as he denied giving me a substantial work in Finance there.

Next day, 6th June, I went to Industrial Area, near Amausi airport. It took me 45 minutes to reach there and another 45 minutes to find the warehouse. It was raining heavily and I was warned not to go by my parents. I did, and it paid.

When I went there, it was all deserted godown what I found. Various useless ruested machineries, broken trucks and tractors, bricks and mortar, etc. were lying at all places. I went to Mr. Brijesh, who was the Warehouse Manager of UP East circle. He explained me about the working of and at the warehouse. After that, when I proceeded towards the place where real work happens, I came to know that there was a power failure and generator was also not working.

I was introduced to Mr. Abhishek Khurrana who was the Warehouse Manager of Lucknow who suggested the rest of the employees to play cricket. A ball and a bat was arranged and the next 30 minutes, we played cricket.

When the power resumed, we went for work. I was asked to come inside the office where the SAP software was being used for the operational activities. I couldn't fully understand at one go but got major idea in the 5 minute explanation I was given. The warehouse was stuffed with about 50000 different sized cartons, containing various things like handsets, recharge vouchers, SIM cards, etc.

The warehouse incharge, Mr. Vivek explained me the proper functioning of the operations. It was in laymann's language and I understood almost everything in one hour. I was later told that first Saturday is a holiday at Reliance, so there wouldnt be any work going to take place that day.

I started getting bored by 12 noon so I took permission to leave the warehouse and return back on Tuesday. Now I plan to visit another organization, FINO tomorrow for some work in Finance as I can not do an eight week internship at a warehouse. There is nothing to learn there.

Rest later!!

The Last Few Moments

2009-05-13T10:50:00.001+05:30

Two hours down the clock, and it will be our last class of engineering.

Just couple of minutes ago, when I was walking on the pavement surrounded from all sides by hostel buildings, it suddenly struck me that time rushes faster than the sand in our fist. I was flabbergasted when I realized that the four 'holy' years will finally come to an end very soon. I stopped, looked all around. The Sun was peeping through the smallest gap between the two three-storeyed buildings. I turned around and saw the other hostels each one of where I have spent a year.

The 50 meter path to our very own Annapurna seemed as an eternal journey. My each step was getting heavier and heart was sinking deeper just by realizing that the end is here. Like it is said, every good things come to an end. It had happened five years ago when I left my school living and growing up there for 12 years. Although college stint is just four years, nothing as compared to the schooling, but these four years are equivalent to 4 re-births put together.

Where will we be getting so much fun, relief, excitement, companions, love and leisure again? The roads from here lead everyone into different directions but all head towards a common goal - to earn money and become successful. And to do that, you need to make sacrifices. Work has to become worship and you would be found doing nothing else except it. Circumstances will never allow you to revive these golden moments you enjoyed in the college. MBAs, MSs, jobs, civil services, businesses - everything has a cut-throat competition where only the fittest survives. So to survive, you need to sacrifice the fun and here it seems to stop.

The steps were getting heavier and I went down the memory lane and landed on 25th July of 2005 when I entered the premises for the first college day. The first class was of Maths taken by Dr. Sanjeev Sharma and ironically, few hours later, the same person would be taking the last class.

How we made new friends, how we danced in excitement when we purchased our first (or second) computers, how we fought over trivial things, how we waited long for each one to get ready for lunch/dinner and go together, how we arranged notes at 3 am for next day's exam, how we finished the project work minutes before the final submission, how we played various games together, how we jumped the campus walls to enjoy Delhi's night life, how we proposed for the first time in our lives (and got rejected probably :P), how we spent hours chatting on the gTalk, how we hurled abuses when power was cut even for a minute, how we rebuked students who pleaded the teachers for marks, how we made fun of the faculty members leaving none spared, how our favorite topic was always our HOD and his genius works, how we cursed the system of our college, how we shared secrets of each other and hoped it would always remain a secret, how we always had eyes on chics of other years blaming the fortune for lack of them in our own and how we always found out a place in the campus where some construction was going on.

The list of these lovely nostalgic events would never end. Our memory is clung to every nook and corner of this campus. If I (as a student of 2005 batch) remember what this college was four years ago, it would be too difficult. Change is inevitable and so has this place changed, so have people changed and so have we ourselves. We are no more those innocent ones who just had come outside their homes for the very first time. We have learnt to live lives - someone on their own terms and someone accepting the reality of the world.

We completed our teens midway and now as we go out, we are seen as responsible citizens. Responsibility grows with age - towards our country, parents, elders and ourselves. 22 years are a good enough time to have enjoyed every moment of lives in some way or the other and God has been the perfect engineer to give us minds to keep those memories safe for a long long period.

On 23rd May 2009, when the final exam of our final semester ends, we officially bid adieu to the academic life of graduation (final year project presentation remains, though). People going for jobs and earning money the hard way will have to change a lot to acclimatize to the new surroundings. And those going for MBAs and MSs will get to know what real stuff is all about.

Just when I was flipping those memory pages back in my mind, I found the last page was blank still. Something has to be written there. And we still have the liberty to choose what to write in it. The remaining few days of our best days of life are in our hand and the outgoing champions need to make full use of them. Contradicting to what I said earlier, it is not the end here. It is the new beginning. - the new Dawn. I wish all the best from my side to all the people who are directly or indirectly connected to this article. May you enjoy super success throughout your life. God bless you all!!!

Make your websites beautiful

2009-05-10T12:53:00.001+05:30

Here are some very useful links to make your websites more attractive. An attractive website generates hits and makes user interested in one’s work. And these link will prove to be helpful in this field.

Text link: Professional Logo
URL : http://www.logoangel.com

Text link:Brochure Templates
URL : http://www.brochuremonster.com

Text link:Free Web Design
URL : http://www.freebiewind.com

Text link:Website Templates
URL : http://www.templatewind.com

Text link:Vista Icons
URL : http://www.icongalore.com

IPL - Season 1 overview, Season 2 prediction

2009-04-26T02:47:00.004+05:30

Although this post is coming a week late, but it is never late than ever. IPL second phase began in South Africa on 18th April, 2009 amidst a lot of drama over the hosting and security issues. It began with Mumbai Indians taking on Chennai Super Kings.

The last year winner, Rajasthan Royals are Tanveer and Watson-less, and it again seems the weakest team, although it cant be ruled out after seeing the last year's performances.

Chennai Superkings were the runner up last year. With the inclusion of Freddie, they seem to be the strongest batting line-up with Hayden in good form. But they have already lost two matches out of three and Freddie out of the tournament, it is going to be tough task ahead for mastermind Dhoni.

Punjab XI finished third in the first IPL phase with Shawn Marsh being the orange cap holder. But with his and Lee's absence, Punjab looks to have lost the track. Having won one out of three outings, Preity's boys have to do something miraculous, specially Yuvraj, in order to win more kisses from her. [:P] (no offenses).

Delhi Daredevils had the strongest top order last year with Sehwag, Gambhir and Dhawan in top forms. Gambhir has proved a flop in the two matches he played this season, Dhawan has been exported to Mumbai Indians. Yet they won two, lost one. I wonder why they aren't playing Pidgeon.

Mumbai Indians were the unluckiest team last season with nearly losing all the matches very closely. Absense of Sachin from initial matches was already a big jolt to them when Bhajji slapped Sreesanth, digging his own grave. They just missed the semi finals berth and finished fifth, even when Jaisuriya was in top form.

Kolkata Knight Riders, probably the women's and Bengali's favourite team because of the SRK and Dada factor, they ended sixth. Started the tournament exceptionally well with McCullum hitting in excess of 150, they toiled hard later on. The Bollywood Biggies couldn't help but to see their team in despairs.

Bangalore Royal Challengers ended seventh and was hailed as the Test team with Jaffer, Kallis, Chanderpaul, Dravid - all test match experts stuffed in. It was later engulfed in controversies between the captain and the owner, Mallya, over the below average performances.

Deccan Chargers had the IPL tailored players in the team but then also they succumbed and finished last. With Afridi, Gilchrist, Gibbs, Symonds and Rohit Sharma, no one could have thought that they can't be the winners. A very poor captaincy by our very own VVS Laxman probably led to their downfall.

______________________________________________

Now in this phase, with already 12 matches over, I still persist and predict with the finalists to be Delhi and Mumbai. The four semifinalists will be these two along with Chennai and Deccan Chargers. This is my prediction. Let us see what happens.

Winner - Mumbai Indians. :)

JIVE 2009

2009-04-20T01:43:00.003+05:30

Jive 09 came to end today. 4 fun frolic days... 16th april to 19th april 2009, began with a very dull and expected slow beginning. But unexpectedly it ended amazingly, though comparing it to last year would be the silliest thing.

My last fest with my close buddies, my friends, deemed it to be somewhat special. Though there were only handful of us as many have already gone to Mysore. It began with the Neeraj Sridhar night which was very boring. The next day, equally bring initially, led us to involvie ourselves in photo-sessions, courtsey the last few days with best friends. The creativity and innovation in posing for photographs was the best part. Sakshi, Madhur, Ghosh, Dipsy and Shipra made the evening memorable. I behaved like a monkey, climbing and jumping from highly-elevated regions. Thank God, I didn't hurt myself.

Jaypee really has a beautiful lot of sexy girls in 1st and 2nd year. I can now proudly say that JIIT is not behind Delhi University in terms of beauty. I won't name the girls who I like here, but special mention to the triple S to add glamour to the college crowd.

The third day was a little better. The dances were amazing. Kriti looked mesmerizing. :)

We continued with our photo-sessions, Ghosh was missing this time.

The last day, we wanted it to end with a bang but didn't expect. Earlier, I heard Bombay Rockers weren't coming, so there wasnt too much of excitement. But later, they did come and rocked the night. Theme walk was amizing. She was looking tooooooo hot. Parth and Garg also put up a very funny show of 15 minutes, which took all the 4th years back in time starting from 2005 when we joined this college.

Anyways, these four days will be cherished by me for a very long period. I would like to thank all my friends from 4th year, Madhur, Yuvi, Dipsy, Sakshi, Neha, Littly and Shipra to make these moments memorable. And a very special thanx to Divya. For all the little time, these people were with me, I realized the meaning of true friendship, love and bonding. These moments won't come again but you people will be in my heart forever.

For an official report on JIVE '09, click here. For the KK night last year, click here.

My 22nd Birthday

2009-03-16T01:39:00.002+05:30

Deduct one more year from my age. I have fallen short by 22 years from my total life span. Isn't it fearsome?

Yesterday, I 'uncelebrated' my 22nd birthday. It was the dullest birthday I have ever had. Only the second time away from home on birthday, this time I was left without even friends. Just stepped outside from the hostel for lunch and for dinner.

No cakes, no outings, no masti - just an ordinary day - even more boring than that. Only Yuvraj came to my room at 12 midnight, in comparison to not less than 10 each year. The wishes were, though, flowing well through the internet and phone. But this was the only extent that I enjoyed it.

To the relief, almost everybody this year remebered it, but I am dissappointed with Gaurangi. How can she forget? The prime aspect was the wishes of two of my sweetest friend sharp at 12. I am really greatful to have both of them. My darlings. I love you both.

The walk in the eve with another one of my lovely friend, the last moment wishes of the dear ones and Goli and Rohit calling from America.. very satisfying.

It must have been clear from my post, I look for people remembering my birthday more than to celebrate it with wine, women and friends. And I agree. As far as the treat is concerned, that is due.

364 more days to go for my birthday. :(

Sachin - greatest as always

2009-03-08T10:34:00.002+05:30

New Zealand captain Danielle Vettori said two days back that the NZ team fears Sehwag. That he always demolishes their planned attack and they just cannot plan out things when he is on the crease. Did he forget Indian batting line-up still has Sachin's name figuring out there? Or has he just forgotten the meaning of the name Sachin Tendulkar?

163 of 133, that too unconquered. Sachin's stats read

Sachin Tendulkar caught himself bowled himself 163*

Hardly was he beaten in the complete innings, but the highlights would surely be the vintage Sachin dancing down the track and heaving the NZ bowlers for six. But it seems this takes a bit power to hit. Then what for Dhoni, Sehwag and Yuvraj are there? If Sachin is hitting sixes, they have to be carved out so smoothly that it wouldn't seem even a single at all. But when the delicate shots that Sachin played over extra cover region, sixes and fours were competing themselves to get ahead of the other.

Hardly the NZ bowlers were blessed with a dot ball after his ton. Sweeps, glances, late cuts, straight drives, pulls, cuts... I thought he was playing with a tennis ball. Marvellous. I felt a wave of premonition for the NZ that Sachin would continue the carnage and will become the first batsman to reach 200. Yuvraj and Dhoni, the youngistan brigade, were easily outplayed and outclassed. I was feeling to thrash all those critics who always criticized him.

He went ahead to complete 150, and then tragedy struck. Of late, it has been a regular for him not being able to play 50 overs because of a sprain, muscle pull or any other injury. We saw it in the WC 03 against Pakistan, and there are many such instances. What is common in all is that the strike rate has always been above 100, he has always scored in abundance and has been the dominating player of the match. Others just revolve around him to give support. Again a muscle pull, but he continued to annihilate the bowlers.

Sixes raining even in utter pain. A six, then need of comfort. Back to business, a four, again screaming of pain. This is the real power of a supreme genius. Sachin is not the greatest only about his game but the aura and the courage he infuses in himself and in the team is more than remarkable.

Critics have now got a point. Sachin's fitness. I know rather than praising his valiant efforts, they will barb that he is unable to stand on the field for 3.5 hours. Without even thinking that it is needless for him to spend that time. What others can do in 3.5 hours, he can complete that task in less than 2. Indians should be thankful to the almighty that Sachin is born in India. If they cant, let them rot. For the time, my prayers for Sachin. He gets fit and ready for the next slaughter.

A strange saga

2009-03-07T19:01:00.002+05:30

Somehow, I realized I was getting late for executing the activities lined up for the day. Back in my subconcious mind, the schedule list unrolled, and after getting alarmed by the length of the list, I opened my eyes in fright.

I had slept at 4 in the morning and it was still 8. As a daily resolution, I promised myself to sleep by 1 from that day. But resolutions are, of course, meant to be broken. I was still lying down and saw the ceiling fan desperate to perform its duty. It has been doing it since the last evening and since the onset of summers continuously. I turned my head towards right, and found my room partner missing. "Must have gone for the breakfast", I thought.

"Got to meet my Research project teacher at 9," I read the first to-do thing on the schedule list still unrolled in my mind. "Then, have to go to library....."

I stood up for the daily ablutions. The moment I turned the knob of the shower, water gushed out momentarily for two seconds before everything drying up. "No Water!" I exclaimed and hurled curses to the college management. It would be three days now I wouldn't have taken a bath. My deoderant was also a few days' survivor. I washed my face with the water in my drinking bottle and finished it up, before realizing what I would drink now.

After dressing up in the blue apparel which we call uniform, I headed towards my Research project teacher. Hopping and skipping, I was on verge of reaching the academic block, when I saw my 29-year old teacher, resting in the area enclosed by the fountain (ofcourse, it was dried up) with a beautiful girl lying over him. His eyes were closed so he could not see me. He was relaxing so nonchalantly that I was shocked. The girl, I identified, was of 3rd year and my long time crush. I felt like breaking my teacher's head on the spot. How could he do this? Isn't there a word called 'shame' in his dictionary? I was too dejected. This wasn't expected at all. And the girl!! Gawd! The most surprising thing was that no-one was noticing them as if it is an everyday matter.

I went to library, brushing all the clumsiness I had been in. As soon as I stepped my foot in, there was a spark somewhere and in moments, the library was blazing in fire. I was lucky I was on the exterior of the building and thus, ran for my life. There was no water in the whole building, so the precautionary measures could not be taken. It was not too late when all the books got burnt up.

An immediate meeting was called in by the Vice Chancellor and all students were asked to attend it. I seated myself in the first row. He began his speech, "Our library got burnt up and we have been informed that a student Vaibhav Jain is responsible for it. I ask him to come on the stage."

What the hell? Why was I responsible? Before I could react, the fuming students gave a kick on my ass and I rolled on to the stage. I got up and tried to explain my innocence to the VC. Before I could speak, he said, "Well done Vaibhav. I am proud of you. Those books were bound to be burnt. Bookish knowledge is not what we want. We need freedom. The Chancellor too got burnt dead in the fire, and this is the best news I can get. Now from tomorrow, I hope I will be the Chancellor. Students, I order you not to leak this information outside. From tomorrow, no studies, only awaragardi in this masti ki pathshaala".

For one moment, I was shocked and then was overwhelmed when the ass-kickers embraced and thanked me. I reciprocated by accepting that the fire was planned by me in one of the best possible ways, and yes, I am proud to have executed it well.

I was hailed as a hero and was lifted on the shoulders of fellow students. On the way, I saw my Research teacher lip-locked with my crush but I didn't feel bad this time. I had girls all around me, wishing to kiss me. I was being treated like a Bollywood star and was enjoying every moment.

I was taken back to my hostel room. I was too thirsty but the water still wasn't there. I asked my 'fans' to bring me a bottle of water. Everyone left altogether to fetch it for me. I was sitting in my room alone when there was a knock on my door. "Come In!" I knew another of a fan must have come.

It was my crush who was with my teacher in the fountain moments ago. "What have you come here for?" I furiously asked her. "To kiss you", and she jumped at me.

Scene cut. Later in the evening, when I stepped outside my room, everything seemed to be normal. The library was intact, the books were there. Water was plenty throughout the campus. My teacher was no more in the fountain but in his cabin. My crush didn't bother to recognize me. I felt I had lost my status. But what happened so quickly?

I was just pondering over the change when the Chancellor stood infront of me. I was shocked to see him alive. Then he spoke, "So you are Vaibhav Jain who killed me, right? I have come straight from the hell to take you along with me. Come", he said and grabbed my hand. Then he pointed his hand in the direction of the ground and we both went below it. Seconds later, I was in hell. I closed my eyes tightly.

Terrified though excited, I opened my eyes and saw the fan still doing its duty. My room-mate was still sleeping on his bed. A mixed feeling aroused my emotions. I thanked God for it being a dream, or I would call it a nightmare. The clock had struck 6, I still had two more hours to sleep. I tried hard to sleep and dream further what I was dreaming, but the story had come to an abrupt end. I tried to invent my own fictional theories, but how could I describe the hell?

Anyways, I couldn't sleep then. It was 8. I took a bath (after two days - that's reality :P). Water was flowing in full speed. I went to my teacher, he was engrossed in some work. I couldn't stop my grin when I saw him and he kept asking what had happened to me. On my way to library, I thought someone had said, we only see that in dreams which we think in reality. But I had never thought about the fantasies ever that I had gone through hours ago.

My apologies to all who might be cursing me after reading this. But it is a true saga. What can I do? :P

Resolution

2009-03-07T16:11:00.002+05:30

Now I wouldn't be putting any English poems on the blog. They will always reside with me in my comp/diary. No publicizing of poems now.

इश्क

2009-03-06T16:45:00.004+05:30

These are 4 lines I have composed as a first attempt in Urdu. I wanted to call it Shayri, but my friend, Mukul, who is an expert shayar [:P] puts them as just a rythmic combination of words and says I still have to go a long way. I hope the start is average, but my future works shine.

जब रूह में बसा हो इश्क,

तब आँखों में सजते हैं अश्क,

जब नैना बोले दिल की आवाज़,

तब वक़्त को मिले नया साज़.

Friends!!!

2009-03-05T23:37:00.003+05:30

the sleepless nights, the dreary days,

the mystic minds, the gloomy rays,

the surreal surroundings, the dangerous dreams,

driving me crazy as it seems.

the morale shattered, the hopes extiguished,

the fervour from the heart involuntarily banished,

the fear of defeat, the jeer of throng,

always proves my capabilities to be wrong.

in the dearth of hopes, the support we require,

in the search of something that motivates to aspire,

a friend in need is a friend indeed,

showering love and care without any greed.

the selfless sacrifices, the flawless shield,

will surely ensure your victory is sealed,

the happiness they provide, the blessings they yield,

never lets your weakness revealed.

the stupendous support, the prodigious patronage,

the manifolding love, no drop of rage,

blessed are those who are blessed with a true friend,

somewhere from the heavens for us they have been sent.

Attendance system destroys purpose of education

2009-02-15T15:00:00.005+05:30

During the four year stint at my college, I was taught by numerous teachers. Old-young, male-female, lenient-strict, jovial-serious, cool-short tempered, etc. Teachers form the base of a student's life, not only academically but can also mould his overall persona. They are said to be our second parents.

Every academic institution has certain rules. Rules which students have to follow and rules which teachers too have to. Afterall, they are also employees. Like all fingers are not equal, it is impossible to find all students same characteristically. There are a bunch of them who are motivated and serious towards studies while the majority believe in the 'last-minute studies'. The latter would prefer not attending classes regularly and study the syllabus on their own.

In India, majority of the colleges lay stress on the attendance. 75% or 80% varies from college to college and course to course. Here at my college, it varies from course to course. But how many of you would agree with the righteousness of this attendance system? Let me highlight some aspects which may reveal how this has affected and may affect the lives of the student.

One of my friends is into core research work. He likes to wake up till morning hours exploring the world of knowledge. I have never seen him wasting his time in unscruplous activities. But because of the weird time he sleeps, he misses most of the classes. His attendance has never been over 30% in any of the course, yet he outscores anybody and everybody whose attendance is even cent percent.

When investigated by the teachers, he laid down his problem. He was advised to change his routine otherwise he would have to be debarred from giving examinations. But his view point was that he could concentrate best in the night hours when there is no noise and disruptions. He had to changed his routine unwillingly and he ruined his exams and probably the habit of exploration.

A first year guy had 74% attendance in a subject and yet he was the top scorer till second terminal exams. But he was 1% short so was debarred and forced to give supplementary exams where the best grade one can score is a D (just pass). Imagine!

There are numerous such incidents which teachers and authorities don't realize but by which they ruin the careers and lives of students. On an average, about 15 minutes are wasted in a class of 50 minutes for attendance purpose. How so ever worse the teacher teaches, he/she is the best in inflicting short attendance and debarred punishments. It is this regular unwanted attendance drama that initiate the 'proxy' culture and is the start of the unfair affairs popping into the student's minds.

The faculty would arise the question - why don't they attend the classes? It is just because the teachers fail to build the interest in the course and in the class. There are certainly many teachers whom you force yourself to listen to. Because you know you will gain a lot by them. But then you also know you would be wasting your precious one hour by sitting idly in other classes where you can't understand a thing. You would prefer to study that from the book and still score good marks, so what is the need of such a teacher?

I feel everyone is a genius in himself. So the purpose of teacher pertains to just imparting his knowledge to us which would save us time going through numerous texts which the teacher has already been through. Since reading takes much more time than listening, the teachers shortens the time taken to learn. But if he/she fails to do this, there is no point wasting your time.

I have noticed the teachers who force attendance, uniform, discipline, etc. are those who themselves lack in quality knowledge. These parameters are just to show their superiority. But, there are teachers who would not care about your attendance, yet students will have it 100%, because they like to listen to them.

A deep research in this field shows that teachers are not completely to blame. They themselves are irritated by this regulation. It is the authority who is responsible. The authority is the employer of the teachers, so even they become subjugated. But then, a grade B teacher is always apprehensive about his job. A good teacher will only care for the learning of a person.

So the sole purpose of this article is to raise the voice against some of these unwanted activities by the authorities and rather ask the teachers to sharpen their teaching skills and rouse interest in the students' minds for the course. I am sure no one likes to miss classes if he gets something worth out of it. At this age, each one of us are mature to make and take decisions.

Valentine-less again

2009-02-14T21:52:00.001+05:30

So one more 14th day of February passes with me stuck in my room. I will be 22 this year and still haven't got the pleasure to celebrate this 'festival'. Sometimes I think, why me? Why don't I have anyone with whom I can also go out and enjoy? Is it luck? Or is it shear misfoturne for the girls who lack good taste. :P

I bet you would interpret "Grapes are sour" from what I am going to explain. Bu that is totally upto you. How could I argue with your interpretations? But see, there are soooo many advantages of being single and Valentine-less.

I could find time to write a blog post even on this day. Many of my Valentinefull friends got up early in the morning, dressed up in the best possible attire, and went out with their partners. Some on bikes, some by cars and the vehicle-devoid ones chose the autos and buses. Total money wastage.

Gifts. The prime aspect of the 'festival'. I don't understand what is so special about this day when you are 365 days with your partner, giving her gifts every other week? Only difference I could find is that atmospheric color changes to Red. I again save money by not having to buy the gifts.

Being single also means no 'Emosanal Atyachaar' inflicted by your girl friend. No sobbing when they seem to lose the battle and we pleading them to forgive us for having won it. No 'doosri ladki ka chakkar' (all are 'pehli'). There is also no tension of the social activists like RSS, Sri Ram Sene, MNS etc. Sorry, but if you are fortunate enough to get beaten up, I don't think parents will feel proud. Not mine atleast when I would concealingly go out with my girl.

This day for me is like any other HOLIDAY, celebrated in the memories of SOMEBODY (St. Valentines here). 22 years have gone, and still I am safe from the relationship shackles. And I am enjoying being single.

But all being said, I am cognizant of the adage, "Jo Khaye Pachchtaye Jo Na Khaye wo Lalchaye". Hope to get an opportunity to celebrate it next year. :P

Till then.. Anybody interested??

The day with the Aussies

2009-02-04T17:01:00.005+05:30

Continuing from the post before this, where I mentioned I do not like India anymore, I have decided to pursue further education in Australia. And what a co-incidence, a few days later around 20 people from Edith Cowan University, Perth Australia (www.ecu.edu.au) visited our campus. They were invited by our college management (I heard so, but I doubt :P).

18 students from Australia were divided into 6 groups with 3 students from our college stuffed into it to make it a team of 6. After 90 minutes of interesting drama, we finally came to a conclusive, illustrious Game Design. It was all good until our team spoilt it badly during presentation.

Anyways, leaving the technical aspects aside, which you can always find on my sister blog (www.blog.vaibhavjain.net). It was a very exciting day. I got to know about the social and academic culture of the people of the country I wish to go. I had other plans too, like gaining some insight about the MBA program there, but (no offenses), the person I asked about it didn't even know the meaning and the full form of it.

The second aim, ofcourse, to interact with the chics. :P There was one beautiful girl in the whole lot (only 1.. ya.. dissappointing). The guys were humorous, humble and had great sportsmanship.

There were Koreana and Sri Lankan also. Arunesh sang a song for us and the SriLankan guy presented an amazing dance. :D

In the end of the workshop, there were exchange of gifts for the winners and runner ups. Then, we headed for our Annapurna. (Gosh! they know how to make delicious food, then why the heck, we are not served that daily?) We ended the note by the photo-session. Would be uploading the photos soon.

All in all, a great day. Wish there were some more girls with them. Looking forward to more interactions like this in future, and my career in Australia.

For a decent write-up about today, go to the blog I mentioned above.

I don't like India anymore...

2009-01-31T01:51:00.007+05:30

'Ye Mera India, I love my India' is a very famous and patriotic song from Pardes. Hundreds of these kinds of songs have been composed which are played only on 26th January or 15th August. But the milliion dollar quesion - "How many of us REALLY love India?"

My answer - I don't. I try to infuse in myself all the possible respect and love for the country but something or the other is so common here, that I have to change my stance always. India is my home and one's home is the place where he is happy, safe, satisfied and protected. How many of you are here who feel any one of these here?

Let me list down some incidents that has made me contradict myself what I felt some years ago. May be I wasn't aware of it then, but as the bubble of knowledge is expanding, I don't feel like staying here any more.

The corruption and the politics. Oops! Synonyms? Yes, they are. The corruption in the politics dates back to the British regime. If one does a research on the people like Mahatma Gandhi and complete Nehru family, they are in for the biggest shocks of their lives. Read about Mahatma Gandhi at http://fuehrer-pratyush.blogspot.com/2009/01/why-gandhi-was-assassinated.html

And just look at this figure.

The present day politics is worse, with people like Mulayam SIngh Yadav, Mayawati, LK Advani, Lalu Prasad Yadav, Sonia Gandhi, Mamta Bannerjee, Arjun Singh (the list never ends) rule the country. Most of them are illiterate and rest have become illiterates after coming to power.

After APJ Abdul Kalam Sir completed his tenure, how many of you have seen about Pratibha Patil making some news? She is comletely non-existant. Just because she was promoted to the highest seat through dirty politics. I read that the wife of Havildar Bahadur Singh Bohra was not allowed to enter the Rashtrapati Bhawan along with her two daughters, five and three, because of security reasons. Someone remembers, how children were permitted inside the President's House during Kalam Sir's tenure? Someone please explain the officials, where would the poor lady go with her two kids whose husband died for the country.

In India, Government awards multiple crores to Yuvraj Singh, Abhinav Bindra to win a Game. But awards Rs. 5 lakhs to soldies who DIED just to protect the same officials of Government (people of course). Cricketers get an AC delux buses to travel whereas NSG commandos get a BEST bus after their long battle to return back.

India is a country where it takes 9 hours for these NSG commandos to reach the location because of great rules and regulations. India is a country where women are vested with equality rights, yet beaten up by some self proclaimed activists who are so patriotic that they have taken upon themselves so instil a sense of Indian culture in the Indian girls and boys.

On one hand we say we are ready to compete with West, then why do we lack behind when it comes to freedom of our own citizens? Don't we have independence to lead our lives on our own will? Visiting pubs is not Indian culture, but then molesting and raping a girl is Indian culture by the same people.

Fraudulent like Satyam's Raju, Harshad Mehta etc. exist in India and I know they succeeded just because our Government is a eunuch. Had some strictness been prevailed, these kinds of cases would have not been happened. I bet there are still several such cases still prevalent which will take time to come out.

Awarding Padma Shri to people like Aishwarya Rai and Akshay Kumar, then committing a serious error by naming a merchant as a craftsman, I don't understand by which criteria does some of these receive the awards. What has Aish done so great? Expose??

In Lucknow, there is always a competition between Mayawati and Mulayam Singh Yadav over constructing parks, bridges, fly overs, etc. But as soon as Government changes, the work stands stagnant which was started by the opposition and even often demolished. Sheer waste of money in such a poor country. Mayawati has erected a statue of herself guarded by two security people :P

Unemployment, unhygenic places, illiteracy, exploitation, are some of the MINOR issues existing in the country. But lastly I would mention the terrorism. How can this word be separated from India? Even after so much of destruction, India stands soft to its enemies, probably because of its ahimsa culture. Wah Gandhiji! People are still following you.

These are the reasons why people never return back who have gone abroad. I know many fingers will be pointed at me after reading this thing, but I stand adamant to the fact, India is no longer safe, a happiness zone or deserves to be called a HOUSE. I agree I am no one to condemn anyone since I haven't done anything. But that is how system is running here. No one is doing anything.

For my own contradiction of this, read my post here.

The Rahman and The Oscars

2009-01-23T13:05:00.002+05:30

The celebrations have begun. In a saga, what many would say, deteriorates India's image on a global scenario, has in turn, turned the country's fortunes. Though Danny Boyle's attempt to showcase the true India has brought him laurels all across the globe, it has highlightened what India is really all about.

People like Amitabh Bachchan may not have been among the jubilant lot. They may be right. But reality is reality. Slumdog Millionaire is totally an Indian story, based on an Indian novel, Indian cast and crew, half of the production team is from here and then, A R Rahman. Who can neglect his contribution?

With 10 Oscar nominations, Rahman gets 3 of them. It is being expected he will bring 2 of them home. He will fail on the 3rd just because he competes with himself in that category.

Rahman and me. A combination many of my acquaintances might well aware of. I don't remember which was the last song and how long it has been when I heard a non-Rahman song. I think more than a fortnight.

For me, Rahman being nominated or even winning the Oscar does not simmer my blood. Though the entire gamut of media - newspapers, television, internet, radio - are singing high in praise of the maestro, I do not feel anything special about it. It is just because his every composition for me is an Oscar winner. It is just that he is publicly, formally and legally getting it this time.

The situation is just like Sachin attaining the 50 century mark. I won't be roused up like a rowdy rabble, because I know it has to happen. It is written. Nothing special about it. His each century is a celebration for me.

Now one should wonder about this. Rahman has been in the industry since 1990. He has produced miraculous soundtracks over these two decades in India. Roja, Bombay, Dil Se, Rangeela, Taal, RDB and many more are in the league of being extra-ordinary. But except for Roja, he hasn't got the global applause, which a foreign movie Slumdog has given him. Why wasn't Luka Chhupi and Khalbali not nominated for Oscars?

These queries raise one's doubts and at the same time, dissappoints. Jai Ho, no doubt is amazing and one of the best, was previously ready to be featured and used in Yuvvraaj. How many of you will agree in that case it would have made to the Oscars? Leave Oscars, how many in the globe would have even cared to hear it?

This is the modern day difference of Bollywood and Hollywood. One more difference in the music of Rahman - why has all of his international projects achieved so much of fame and are seriously delicious tracks whereas his success ratio in Bollywood is not 100%? The answer is given by the maestro himself in one of his interviews.

He told that he had started sounding repetitive to himself. He was frustrated by some of the Bollywood directors who did not allow him to experiment, yet wanted something different. But that is a sheer impossibility, isn't it? And then people criticize Rahman. Unfair, right?

He listed down four directors that he was comfortable working with and who gave him his space. Aamir Khan, Maniratnam, Ashutosh Gowariker and Rakesh Omprakash Mehra. And hardly he has dissappointed the over-expecting Indian crowd when combining with any of these.

He also is willing to do more international projects now. And I appereciate his decision. A genius of his calibre deserves Hollywood only. Only in that case, he can be worldwide known. Only in that case he can create a niche, a difference, a mark and bring a change.

I wish him all the best for his Oscars. By the time, Delhi 6 and Slumdog Millionaire are the only two albums in my playlist.

Rang De Basanti vs Delhi 6

2009-01-22T09:47:00.002+05:30

Of the last two ventures of the renowned director, Rakesh Omprakash Mehra - Aks and Rang De Basanti, music of the latter was given by the maestro A R Rahman. It went on to create history and was the most sought after and superhit music of the year and still people crave to hear it.

Now, the director is back with his next flick - Delhi 6 - starring Abhishek Bachchan and pretty Sonam Kapoor. Ofcourse, by the title it seems the story is something about Chandni Chowk area of Delhi, but I am not going into that. The music is again lent by Rahman but what I observed is a tinge of similarity in the music of both the movies.

None of you must be unaware that RDB's story was set in Delhi and same goes with Delhi - 6. Delhi's monuments - India Gate was shown in RDB while Jama Masjid has been shown in Delhi -6. But going about the music, I, kind of, find a similarity in music. I am not saying that the songs are repetitive or "inspired", but the scenario and their way of showcasing (movie is not released so its just my observation by hearing the songs) is similar.

Taking all cases, Rang de Basanti title song can be compared to Arziyan in a manner that both have loud and heavy vocals, with former by Daler Mehendi and latter by Kailash Kher.

Delhi 6 title song can be compared to Be a Rebel of RDB. Both seem to be rap, with most of the lyrics in English. One highlights the beauty of India while other praises Delhi 6. The pace of both are fast.

Tumhre Bhavan from Delhi 6 can be comapred to Ik Onkar of RDB. Both are sung in praise of the God, one for Sikhs and the other for Hindus. There is a light backing music in both with vocals leading the track all through.

Noor from Delhi 6 is similar to Lalkar from RDB. Both are totally narrative, with former by Amitabh Bachchan and latter by Amir Khan.

The major is the similarity between Tu Bin Bataye and Rehna Tu. The two softest melodies I have ever heard, Rehna Tu can be heard 100 of times just like Tu Bin Bataye in a stretch. Both calm you, soothe you. Both are romantic numbers. Lyrics of both stand out and out. I give the best lyricist award of 2009 to Prasoon Sir for this song. I dont want to wait for the entire year to choose. This is the best.

Pathshala can, somewhat, be compared to Kala Bandar. Though no similarity in the concept, both are pacy tracks with western music accompanied with drums as the lead. Both are sung by multiple singers in chorus.

One more with a minute similarity can be Khoon Chala and Dil Gira Gafatan. Not at all similar in concept, both are light songs with light background music. Piano is the lead in both. I know not many of you would agree on this, but that is my perception.

Luka Chhupi and Bhor Bhaye have similarity in the point that both are classical songs and Tabla plays a major role over here. The Tabla is awesomely played which is not used in any of Rahman's song between the period of these two songs (Except for Khwaja - but that is not classical but Sufi).

Khalbali and Roobaroo from RDB cannot be compared to Masakalli and Genda Phool from Delhi (except Khalbali and Masakalli end with "li" :P). Genda Phool is a mindblowing track which is probably never heard from Rahman before.

Overall, RDB was a super duper hit and I feel Delhi 6 is in RDB's league. Hats off to Sir! Not a single song from Delhi 6 is average (similarly RDB had none).

Rehna Tu... from Delhi - 6

2009-01-19T23:11:00.004+05:30

Rehna Tu... Hai Jaisa Tu...

is one of the best songs of Rahman Sir I have ever heard. Sung by himself, it stands solely out and out song of the album which is, nevertheless, filled by numerous sweet melodies.

The lyrics of this song are such that every poet would crave to pen them down. Hats off to Prasoon Sir. A romantic melody, the last 2 minutes just comrises the instrumental and you would still wish that the song should have been bigger than the actual 6:51 min.

It is the softest melody I have heard in recent times and that too some notes are on high scales, which adds beauty to its nature.

I just cant stop listening to this. It is the 23rd time in the row I am listening to it. I could even stretch to 100. I wish I had a girl friend to whom I could dedicate this song.

Please listen to it, and you would really love it. It is even better than many of the Slumdog's songs.